5 12 2012

KATE MIDDLETON, Duchess of Cambridge is reportedly pregnant! And Tito Sotto was like, “Sabi ko sa inyo ‘di gumagana ang pills eh!”

Buckingham Palace has confirmed reports that Kate Middleton is pregnant! But Kate was quick to deny rumors that Jake Ejercito was the father.

Kate Middleton is having a baby! Albie Casiño’s mother wants a DNA test.

Popular Names
According to BabyCenter.Com, ‘Aiden’ and ‘Sophia’ are the most popular baby names for 2012. The least popular is ‘Tito.’

elysRIP: World’s Oldest
CNN reported that the world’s oldest person – a woman, just died. Besse Cooper was 116 years old – Or as Methuselah would say, “Infant!”

Besse Cooper, purportedly the world’s oldest person has died. She was 116 years old. If Cooper was Filipino, I wouldn’t be surprised if she still gets to vote in next year’s polls.

According to Sidney, one of Besse’s children, his mother always told them her best years were when she was “in her 80s.” To which Juan Ponce Enrile said, “I know, right!”

The world’s oldest person has died. The second oldest person can’t wait to assume the vacant title.

The oldest person in the world – Besse Cooper is dead. She was 116. Besse died of exhaustion after reading bed time stories to her 12 children, 45 grand children, and 22 great grand children.

Besse Cooper, the world’s oldest person died at 116. She experienced two world wars, witnessed man’s exploration of the moon, and saw the bombing of the World Trade Center. Unfortunately, she didn’t live long enough to read Pope Benedict XVI’s first tweet.

Late? It’s Fine!
The Commission on Elections approved the candidacy of a senatorial aspirant who failed to register before the deadline because of heavy traffic. The candidate, who represents Bro. Eddie Villanueva’s Bangon Pilipinas Movement was identified as Israel Virgines, middle name: Exception to the Rule.

The Comelec accepted the candidacy of senatorial aspirant Israel Virgines although he failed to meet the deadline for the filing of COC because of traffic. Thank you so much Comelec! I can’t wait to see him lose.

The Comelec accommodated Virgines just because he’s a member of an influential Church group according to some people. Those people are called “right!”

elysFEU Shooting
Three male students of Far Eastern University were shot by unidentified motorcycle-riding men Tuesday. Two of the victims have died. Reports say authorities are looking into a fraternity-war angle. How about ‘lack of security’ or ‘inutile police’ angle? Try n’yo.

Alfred’s Choice
Re-electionist Quezon City Councilor Alfred Vargas said, “”If ever lang naman na papiliin ako ng tadhana between showbiz and public service, I will choose public service.” To which ‘showbiz’ said, “’Buti naman!”
“You only live once, but if you do it right, once is enough.”
~Mae West

Quotes Quiz
Who tweeted this:

“Bumili ako ng alamang sa palengke kanina at ginisa sa baboy, kamatis, bawang, at sibuyas. Bagoong! Kaunting nilagang talong, suka at sili at umuusok na kanin. Ayos na ang buto buto.”
A: Sen. Kiko Pangilinan
B: Cong. Dato Arroyo
C: DILG Sec. Mar Roxas
D: Cong. JV Ejercito

Enjoy the rest of the week. Stay safe.

I am on Twitter: @HecklerForever.

Answer to Quotes Quiz:
A: Kiko Pangilinan


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