STILL IN BED while writing this post. These are random thoughts on or about the New Year i originally posted on Twitter. Happy New Year!

Overheard: “Definition of a hangover: Wrath of Grapes.”

It’s 2012. It’s make or break for the Mayans.

For the record, I’ve survived three “Rapture” since Dec 31, 1999. I am so ready for another. #2012

Happy New Year Nukualofa, Chatham Islands, Kiritimati, Apia, and Fakaofo! Weh ano naman ngayon kung nauna kayo? Bakit? Sikat ba kayo?

General Forecast: The coming year’s lucky colors: Gamboge, Urobilin, and Café au lait. Can’t pronounce them? Then, you’ll have two months of bad luck.

Ang aking 2011 ay parang gulong. May moments na nasa ibabaw, may moments na nasa ilalim. But generally, it was a good year.

This got to be Osama Bin Laden’s saddest New Year’s Eve ever. His firecrackers were soaking wet. #arabianSea

2011 was a bad year for dictators. Hopefully, 2012 will be worse for them.

This year, Kim Jong-Un should diet.

Talk is cheap. And cheaper if you’re ‘naka-unli.’

I started and ended 2011 on social media. ‘Social life’ redefined.

This coming year, let’s spend some quality time avoiding each other. #bittertweet

Everything’s going digital. You’ll enjoy it more with a complete set of fingers. Think twice before lighting a firecracker tonight.

A recent survey showed that 88 percent of Filipinos welcomed 2012 with hope. Some 400 others welcomed it with stitches and severed fingers.

According to the Department of Health, the top 5 injury-causing fireworks are piccolo, kwitis, fountain, five star & luces… known collectively as, “stubbornness.”

Nicki Minaj’ ‘Super Bass’ and Jessie J’s ‘Price Tag’ are soooo last year!

2012 is the Year of the Dragon. Bad news for Nadia Montenegro.

One of my friends’ New Year’s resolutions is to be extraordinary. ‘Coz right now, he’s sooo predictable. He’s even more predictable than the casting of Deejay Durano in Wenn Deramas movies

Finally, here’s your Horoscope for 2012. Have fun!

Again, Happy New Year!

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I am on Twitter: @HecklerForever.