PIGS

FORMER MAKATI CITY Vice Mayor Nestor Mercado dropped another bombshell in the Senate last Wednesday. Mercado alleged that the Binays own a 350-hectare estate in Rosario, Batangas. The media dubbed it ‘Hacienda Binay.’ That’s how much Tita Cory had influenced the Vice President.

11BINAY ESTATE
According to Nestor Mercado, the estate has two mansions, a 40-car garage, a cock breeding farm, an orchid farm, a “maze garden” patterned after the Kew Gardens in London, a horse ranch, an air-conditioned piggery, and a man-made lagoon. Or as PNP Chief Allan Purisima would say, “ordinary.”

The sprawling property, Mercado claimed, is equivalent to “six Luneta Parks, 10 Araneta Centers or even half the city of San Juan.” To give you an idea of how huge the property is, Binay tried to survey the estate from end to end on foot while he was still a city mayor. He only finished the survey when he was already the country’s vice president.

The alleged Binay estate in Rosario, Batangas has an air-conditioned piggery – the second of its kind to be built in the Philippines… after Batasang Pambansa.

Nestor Mercado bared that it was the idea of former Makati City Mayor Elenita Binay to install air-conditioning units in the piggery. Even Imelda Marcos was like, “That’s too much.”

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The Binays’ air-conditioned pig farm was put up in 1994. In fact, the farm recently marked its 20th anniversary. To celebrate the momentous event, the pigs were given cakes.

Despite the series of shocking exposés, the Vice President will not attend the Senate inquiry. You know, he’s focused on his work. He’s got a tough job as vice president. The only thing tougher is the job of his PR team and damage control group.

Lawyer JV Bautista, interim secretary-general of UNA and a staunch Binay defender called for a lifestyle check on Nestor Mercado. According to Bautista, the former Makati City vice mayor is a gambler who frequents casinos and has lost millions in cockfights. To which, Mercado replied, “That’s not true. Pustahan pa tayo.”

11BINAY ESTATE
The camp of Vice President Binay has since denied Mercado’s allegations and insisted businessman Antonio Tiu is the real owner of the Batangas estate. To clarify the issue, Tiu has expressed willingness to face anyone: Trillanes, Cayetano, Pimentel… anyone! “Challenge accepted.” – Kim Henares

People have different views on the Binay controversy. Some say as public officials, the Binays must be open to scrutiny. They have a point. Others believe the allegations must be substantiated and backed up with evidence. They also have a point. In fact, everyone who has a piece to say about the issue has a point – except perhaps for Mar Roxas who will probably gain six more points.

When asked to comment on the ill-gotten wealth allegations against the Binays, presidential spokesperson Edwin Lacierda said, “We are not involved in any way. We are just observers.” Then, he high-fives Abi Valte.

When asked to comment on the controversies hounding the Binays, presidential spokesperson Edwin Lacierda said, “We are just observers.” With popcorn, soda, and laughter.
11BINAY ESTATE3Huge Drop
The recent probe on the alleged overpriced Makati City Hall Building 2 has definitely affected public perception of Vice President Binay. His approval and trust ratings in the latest Pulse Asia survey dropped by 15 percentage points. The survey has a margin of error of plus or minus 3 floors.

Of the government’s four highest-ranking officials, Vice President Binay got the highest trust and approval rating. It was so high… Junjun Binay had to take the elevator.

Progress
A report says China has overtaken the U.S. as the world’s largest economy. In third place is the Binay economy.

Q-10Unexplained Wealth
The Anti-Money Laundering Council (AMLC) says Bong Revilla has an unexplained wealth of almost 88 million pesos. Apparently, when Bong was made to explain in writing, he told AMLC he’s better at multiple choice questions.

Reports say Bong Revilla has an unexplained wealth of almost 88 million pesos. He’s in big trouble. He’s not used to explaining about money. The few times he was made to explain by Lani – it was about women.

Cheaters, Inc.
A recent study revealed men who cheat on their wives were more likely to die of a heart attack. In totally unrelated news, doctors at the PGH say Senator Enrile has atherosclerotic cardiovascular disease. #walalang #promise #walatalaga
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“Honest people don’t hide their deeds.”
~Emily Brontë, Wuthering Heights

Sound Bites
“Nakakatawa po iyon. Matagal nang isyu iyon. Dumami na nga nang dumami. Dati nga 150 hectares, tapos naging 200 hectares, ngayon naging 300 na.”
~Vice President Binay on his alleged estate in Rosario, Batangas

Have a great weekend!

I am on Twitter: @HecklerForever.

[Photos: Philippine Daily Inquirer, Office of the Vice President]

KICKBACKS, ROGUE COPS AND OTHER STORIES

1BC
AT LEAST 10 police officers were allegedly behind the EDSA-Mandaluyong robbery-abduction case last week. They have all been identified. Once arrested, they will be presented to the media, and then locked in a room with a drunk Billy Crawford.

Two of the cops who were involved in the EDSA robbery-abduction case were “repeat offenders.” The National Police Commission said SPO1 Ramil Hachero and PO2 Jonathan Rodriguez were slapped with the same charges in 2011. Apparently, they never learned. Hachero and Rodriguez are the Jinggoy Estrada of the police force.

1NMKickbacks
Former Makati vice mayor Nestor Mercado revealed that then city mayor Jejomar Binay received millions of pesos in kickbacks from several infrastructure projects. Which begs the question: how many bidders experienced being trapped in a Makati City elevator?

The Vice President is getting negative publicity of late. His spokesperson, Jonvic Remulla a.k.a. Mr. Cavite governor is blaming Binay’s enemies: Nestor Mercado, Alan Peter Cayetano, and the truth.

According to Nestor Mercado, former Makati City Mayor Jejomar Binay got  a “13 percent kickback” per project. Or in the words of Janet Lim-Napoles, “Cheap!”

Vice President Binay has a scheduled address next week. Jonvic Remulla says his boss will answer the allegations “punto por punto.” But he denies rumors the Vice President will end his speech with a music video.

EXCLUSIVE! Here’s the draft of Vice President Binay’s speech.
1BA

FIBA 2019
Bidding will start soon for the 2019 FIBA World Cup. Some countries have earlier expressed interest to make a bid. But they decided to back out this week after learning that they’ll be up against Hilmarc’s Construction Corp.

Warning
Citing security threats, the Chinese government advised its citizens “not to travel to the Philippines.” To which, Chinese nationals said, “Tanga! We’re already here.”

In a travel warning released the other day, China said, “the safety situation in the Philippines is deteriorating.” Of course, it would have been much safer here without those Chinese drug lords, Chinese traffickers, and defective Chinese products.

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16-Digit Plate
A consumer welfare group and netizens blasted the Land Transportation Office for allowing hundreds of new taxi units [with pending franchise applications] to ply the streets of the metro using 16-digit plate numbers. When sought for reaction, the LTO gave 16 excuses.

The LTO allowed hundreds of new taxi units in Metro Manila to use 16-digit plate numbers. Or as abusive cab drivers would call it, “Awesome!”

Taxi units with 16-digit plates are now roaming the streets of Metro Manila. Thanks to the brilliant minds of LTO. When asked why sixteen numbers were used, the LTO replied, “26 letters are a bit long.”

1BNo Cerebellum
Doctors in China were startled when they discovered that a 24-year-old woman had been living without a portion of her brain. In the Philippines, we call that “LTO.”
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“Politicians: Pinocchios with nose jobs.”
~Bauvard, The Darkness of Nature

Sound Bites
“’Wag naman nating lahatin na kasama sa criminal gangs at criminal activities. Ninety nine percent, the overwhelming majority of the police forces, ay ginagawa ang trabaho nila sa mabuting paraan.”
~DILG Sec. Mar Roxas

“Sabi niya ‘Ma’am, natanggap ko na ‘yong cake, ang sarap ng cake.’ Parang hindi ko tuloy alam, idi-deny ko ba eh parang tuwang-tuwa s’ya sa cake. Pag deniny ko, baka hindi na matuwa sa akin dahil hindi pala ako ang nag-bake no’n.”
~Sen. Nancy Binay

Enjoy your weekend!

I am on Twitter: @HecklerForever.

[Photos: Philippine Daily Inquirer, GMA News, Reuters]