STUNTMAN

mar_bawang3 PRESIDENTIAL ASPIRANT Manuel Roxas II seems to be pulling out all the stops to win the presidential derby in 2010. He rides a pedicab, publicly displays his fondness for a broadcaster, shouted invectives during a rally, proposed marriage on a noontime show, and wore a necklace of garlic on the Senate floor.

As National Historical Institute chair Ambeth Ocampo wrote in his Philippine Daily Inquirer column, “… the original Roxas, or even Gerry Roxas must be rolling in their graves with laughter.” He added, “There is a time and place for everything.”

But will Roxas listen to critics now that his antics seem to have been paying off? I mean, with a five percent-gain in a recent survey, who could stop him from resorting to even the most inane forms of gimmickry?

So what’s next for this diastemaic presidential wannabe? Nobody knows. But here goes…

The Next 5 Most Surprising Publicity Stunts of Presidential Aspirant Manuel Roxas II

5: He will deliver a privilege speech on gender sensitivity and gender equality. This time, he’ll wear a necklace of black pepper (paminta).

4: On Wednesday, he will do a Lacson: “I quit.” On Saturday, he will do a Miriam,”I lied. Hahaha!”

3: He will admit to having a sex video. (Not a single Filipino will buy this gimmick and the issue will just die down.)

2: He shall confess to being gay for several years… until he met Korina Sanchez. Together, they’ll re-appear on Wowowee where he will tell her: “Ikaw ang nagpatigil sa aking pagkabinabae.”

And the No. 1 most surprising publicity stunt of Mar Roxas…

1: To prove his concern for the health and wellness of the youth, he will drive a pedicab to La Salle and while inside the campus, he’ll scream: “Put*ng-i*aaaaaaa! Kung talagang matapang kang virus ka, harapin mo ako! Ako na lang ang saktan mo, huwag na ang mga estudyante!

Light Bites
Q: What is green, hot, 5ft.6 inches vertically, and 4 inches horizontally?
A: A flu-infected La Sallista with a thermometer in his mouth

Q: What is blue & 5ft.7 vertically, and green & 6ft.5 horizontally?
A: Mar Roxas staring at a La Salle cager who’s asleep


Elsewhere…
French Open 2009 champ Roger Federer is attacked by a fan during his finals match against Swede Robin Soderling.

Philippine Star: Chair Wrecker, William Esposo on political advertisements

AM What has happened to the controversial AkoMismo campaign? Check out the group’s website.

Newsbreak: Chief Justice Puno, fashion model?

Philippine Daily Inquirer: Lopez patriarch tells all

Killed Bill: David Carradine – Bizarre death for the septuagenarian actor
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“Know that the amount of criticism you receive may correlate somewhat to the amount of publicity you receive.”
~Donald Rumsfeld

QUITTERS


Lacson Quits
Sen. Panfilo Lacson has quit the presidential race in 2010 because “waging a campaign is expensive.” The only thing more expensive is his battery of criminal lawyers.

Remember what Sen. Panfilo Lacson said last month? “I am 101 percent sure of running for president in 2010.” Now, do you remember what he said about the Dacer-Corbito twin murders?

Top 5 Initial Reactions to Panfilo Lacson’s Latest Bombshell

No. 5:Hayden Kho: “Condemn the quitting, not the quitter.”

No. 4: Mar Roxas: “Put*ng-i*a! Totoo ba ‘yan?

No. 3: Manny Villar: “For my reaction, let me refer you to Senators Pimentel and Cayetano.”

No. 2: Joseph Estrada: “Pareho na kami ngayon: Drop out!”

And the No. 1 initial reaction to Ping Lacson’s latest bombshell…

President Arroyo: “Por diosh, por shanto! Ganyang-ganyan din ang announshment ko noong Deshember 30, 2000, Rizshal Day. Ayokong maniwala hangga’t ‘di pa taposh ang filing ng shertificate of candidashy. Promish, ‘no?”

Quitters
Have you noticed the trend? Senate President Juan Ponce Enrile offered to quit as chair of the senate committee of the whole hearing the ethics complaint against Sen. Manny Villar. A week later, Cong. Jose De Venecia quit the Lakas party. Earlier this week, lawyer Adel Tamano quit as spokesman of the United Opposition and joined the Nacionalista Party. Sen. Panfilo Lacson quit the 2010 presidential race. Quitting has become the “in” thing these days… Jamby contemplates quitting marriage!

A Senate reporter curiously asked Sen. Lito Lapid if he has ever been a quitter. The actor replied, “Tanga ka ba? Facebook nga, ‘di ako marunong, Quitter pa.”

ADEL Tamano Now A Nacionalista
Lawyer Adel Tamano has quit as spokesman of the United Opposition and joined the Nacionalista Party. But there’s no confirmation yet to rumors that Tamano will replace Senators Pimentel and Cayetano as Manny Villar’s spokespersons.

Eddie Villanueva, Again!
Jesus Is Lord leader and presidential aspirant Bro. Eddie Villanueva vowed to mobilize five million(!) of his followers to create a “spiritual earthquake” to stop Con Ass. And we all thought Lito Lapid was funny.

Dangerous
Stormy months are here again. Authorities are warning commuters against dangerous billboards. You know, a falling billboard is the second most dangerous thing these days… next only to a La Sallista.
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“A man is not finished when he is defeated. He is finished when he quits.”
~Richard Nixon

Survey Says…
Who would you vote for president in 2010?
Undecided: 50%
The administration candidate: 27%
The opposition candidate: 23%

We have a new survey. Please vote now.

Enjoy your weekend!

KARMA

null ABS-CBN Suspends TV Host
ABS-CBN suspended the talent contract of libel convict and TV/radio host Cristy Fermin following her explosive tirade against actress Nadia Montenegro which the network said violated the highest standards of professionalism and journalistic integrity. In another report dismissed as “unrelated” by Fermin herself, Kris Aquino has reportedly issued a statement saying, “God is really good and God knows how much I have missed The Buzz.”

ABS-CBN Suspends TV Host II
Libel convict Cristy Fermin has been suspended by ABS-CBN “for violating the highest standards of professionalism and journalistic integrity.” She’ll neither appear on “The Buzz” nor host her radio program on DZMM. Likewise, she’ll automatically be barred from entering the province of Rizal… unless the governor lifts the ban on the entry of Metro Manila garbage.

ABS-CBN Suspends TV Host III
Less than a week after ABS-CBN News boss Maria Ressa fired Cristy Fermin’s protégé – showbiz columnist Ogie Diaz for violating the network’s code of ethics, ABS-CBN Entertainment suspended Fermin for violating the highest standards of professionalism and journalistic integrity. Last month, the network also suspended news executive Luchi Cruz-Valdez and Ces Drilon was also suspended for disobeying her superiors. With these recent developments, ABS-CBN insiders are left with one question: “Bakit sobrang lakas ng kapit ni Willie Revillame?”

null ABS-CBN Suspends TV Host IV
After dismissing tabloid columnist Ogie Diaz, ABS-CBN suspended Cristy Fermin. Network executives were quick to deny allegations… of “ethnic cleansing.”

Dangerous Places
The International Federation of Journalists says Iraq is still the most dangerous place in the world for journalists followed by the African nation of Somalia. In close third was ABS-CBN.


Madonna-Guy Ritchie Divorce
British newspapers say Madonna and Guy Ritchie are splitting up. The rumor intensified when Madonna was spotted in Hong Kong with her make-up artist.

Madonna-Guy Ritchie Divorce II
British newspapers say Madonna and Guy Ritchie are splitting up. Local newspapers are not buying it though… unless Fanny Serrano issues a confirmation.

null Top RP Universities
Overtaking the University of the Philippines System, Ateneo De Manila University topped the 2008 survey of Philippine universities conducted by The Times Higher Education-Quacquarelli Symonds (THE-QS). Perennnial frontrunner UP System doubted the survey saying it did not participate this year after THE-QS asked for an advertising fee of $49,000 or P2M pesos. Distant third placer De La Salle University also issued a statement on Ateneo’s feat. It blamed the referees.

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People pay for what they do, and still more, for what they have allowed themselves to become. And they pay for it simply: by the lives they lead.
– Edith Wharton

B IS FOR BRIBERY

Court of Appeals Bribery
The Lopezes are being accused of bribing Court of Appeals Associate Justice Jose L. Sabio Jr. for a favorable ruling on the Meralco-GSIS row. Let’s see if Judy Ann Santos could explain this one.

Court of Appeals Bribery II
Meralco Chairman and CEO Manolo Lopez said Court of Appeals Associate Justice Jose Sabio Jr. must not worry about his safety after exposing an alleged bribery by the Lopezes. He added, “I want to assure Justice Sabio that the Lopez family has never been involved in any form of violence whatsoever.” I believe him. The Lopezes would never order the assassination of Sabio. Character assassination by DZMM commentators is another issue though.

Court of Appeals Bribery III
The Lopezes’ “emissary” reportedly offered a bribe of 10 million to Associate Justice Jose Sabio Jr… to which the Isnajis of Sulu reacted, “Samantalang kami, five million lang ‘di pa mapagbigyan.”

Pulse Asia Survey
The latest Pulse Asia survey showed that if presidential elections were held today, Vice President Noli De Castro who obtained a rating of 22 percent would win followed by deposed president Joseph Estrada with 16 percent. Sen. Loren Legarda was strong in third with 14 percent – but is expected to zoom to first place if there would be another kidnapping rescue in Mindanao.

Pulse Asia Survey II
The latest Pulse Asia survey showed that if presidential elections were held today, Vice President Noli De Castro would win. The good news is, we’re not having the elections today.

Pulse Asia Survey III
The latest Pulse Asia survey showed that if presidential and vice presidential elections were held today, the tandem of Loren Legarda and Chiz Escudero would win, followed by the Villar-De Castro, and the Roxas-Pangilinan tandems. However, about 1 in 5 Filipino adults do not prefer any of the tandems… and opted to go for the Marian-Dingdong team-up.

Pulse Asia Survey IV
According to Pulse Asia, if presidential elections were held today Senate President Manuel Villar would get 12 percent; Sen. Mar Roxas, eight percent; Sen. Panfilo Lacson, five percent; Makati Mayor Jejomar Binay, two percent; MMDA Chairman Bayani Fernando, one percent and Interior Secretary Ronaldo Puno, 0.2 percent. If you combined their ratings though, Dyesebel would still beat them by a mile.

University Survey
Only the University of the Philippines and Ateneo de Manila University made it to the list of world’s top 500 universities based on the 2007 survey conducted by the Times Higher Education Supplement Quackquarelli Symonds. UP was ranked 398th while Ateneo took 451st place. De La Salle University, which dropped to 519th, is dismayed by the results and seriously considers filing a protest… at the UAAP board.

University Survey II
Only the University of the Philippines and Ateneo de Manila University made it to the list of world’s top 500 universities based on the 2007 survey conducted by the Times Higher Education Supplement Quackquarelli Symonds. UP was ranked 398th while Ateneo took 451st place. University of Sto. Tomas which dropped out of the elite 500 and is now at 535th vowed to make a comeback… by dethroning UP in the upcoming UAAP cheerdance competition.

Abu Sayyaf Strike Again
Reports say the Abu Sayyaf Group has abducted two traders of cosmetic products in Sulu. Reacting to the report, Ces Drilon said, “Sana isinabay na lang sa ‘min no’n.”