THIS JUST IN: Facebook posts reveal Genelyn Magsaysay, Ramona Bautista’s mother, is taking antidepressants. Shocking tabloid news say she’s allegedly getting psychiatric treatment. And in even more shocking news, President Aquino has offered to shoulder her medical expenses.

Turkey was hit by a 5.7-magnitude earthquake killing at least five and trapping dozens in collapsed buildings. Seen running in apparent panic during the tremor was a woman in red scarf.

A news crew of ABS-CBN was able to locate the residence of Ramona Bautista in Turkey. Take that NBI/Interpol!

Ramona Bautista is married to a Turkish national identified in the papers as Engin Tuna Bülbüloğlu. Now we know why she insists on using her maiden name.

Engin Tuna Bülbüloğlu was quoted to have said that in Turkey, Ramona Bautista is untouchable. While in the Philippines, his name is unpronounceable.

Murder suspect Ramona Bautista has been married for three years to Engin Tuna Bülbüloğlu. That name just made “Yilmaz Bektas” sound common.

Maria Ramona Belen Bautista was a hot topic in Turkish newspapers. Take that Ruffa Gutierrez!

This just in: Latest reports say Ramona Bautista’s siblings had a premonition that something bad involving their sister was going to happen. A day before Ramgen was killed, the whole family played bowling and Ramona, a novice at the sport, scored a turkey.

Giant Asteroid
Last Tuesday, Asteroid 2005 YU 55 – a black asteroid as huge as an aircraft carrier just missed the Earth… but partly collided with Ramona Bautista’s jaw.

A global catastrophe was averted when an asteroid as huge as a football field missed planet Earth Tuesday. Asteroid 2005 YU 55 came close to destroying humanity but reversed its direction when it saw competition: Kim Kardashian, Lindsay Lohan, and Ramona Bautista.

Ali Peek
At press time, the lone assailant who shot and injured basketball star Ali Peek has yet to be arrested. Unverified reports say the suspect has applied for asylum in the Dominican Republic.

Most Hated
CNN’s travel website has named the Ninoy Aquino International Airport (NAIA) as the fifth most hated airport in the world. As pageant fans would say, fourth-runner up. Sought for comment, NAIA officials said, “Nope, we’re not going to change our airport. Whoever loves our country must also love our airport.”

In an article titled “World’s 10 most hated airports,” CNN’s Jordane Rane dissed NAIA’s “unkempt conditions, soup kitchen-style lines that feed into more lines, and an overall sense of futility.” Wait, is that NAIA? Sounds more like the MRT.

National Geographic representatives have confirmed that Lolong is now the world’s biggest saltwater crocodile in captivity. When told about the recognition, Lolong said, “Nakakain ba ‘yan?”

Lolong has been named by NatGeo representatives as the world’s biggest saltwater crocodile. Lolong’s very proud colleagues in Agusan Marsh have filed a resolution commending the feat.

Pacman vs. Marquez
Experts predict a Pacquiao victory over Marquez this Sunday. Some say the fight will be over by Round 2. Others believe it could last until Round 8. One thing’s for sure though, TV commercials will last by ‘round midnight.

At least 26 congressmen are watching Manny Pacquiao’s fight in the United States. In fact, the MGM Grand Garden Arena has reserved three rows for them. The seats were labeled, “Las Vegas Marsh.”

Kapamilya Christmas ID
On Thursday night, media giant ABS-CBN launched its 2011 Christmas Station ID. Conspicuously missing were Megastar Sharon Cuneta… and President Aquino.
“He who does not prevent a crime when he can, encourages it.”
~ Seneca

Quotes of the Weak
“Nothing will come out of this incident. Everything is merely made up of allegations. No one can touch us.”
~Engin Tuna Bulbuloglu, Ramona Bautista’s Turkish husband

“If he wants, the President can just come with us. Then, after [my wife’s medical procedure abroad], we can all return home.”
~Former First Gentleman Jose Miguel Arroyo

Stay healthy! Happy weekend!

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PRESIDENT AQUINO gave P5M to the MILF then gave P31M to the ABB. Now, he wants to shoulder GMA’s medical expenses. With an enemy like that, who needs friends?

Photos of the Weak
“From reformer to transformer.”
The images shown here were presented to the media Tuesday by Estelito Mendoza, legal counsel of former president Gloria Macapagal-Arroyo (Thanks to TV5’s Jove Francisco for posting these on Facebook.)

THE DEPARTMENT OF JUSTICE rejected former president Gloria Macapagal-Arroyo’s request for an allow departure order. “There is no compelling or immediate necessity to seek treatment abroad,” according to Dr. Leila De Lima much to the disappointment of Dr. Raul Lambino.

In her previous letters to the DOJ, the Pampanga representative said she was seeking medical treatment in Austria, Germany, Italy, Singapore, Spain, Switzerland and the United States. But it was later discovered that she’s just planning to join the upcoming season of “The Amazing Race.”

In an exclusive interview, former President Gloria Macapagal-Arroyo told Manila Standard Today’s Christine Herrera that she used to take 25 to 30 tablets of painkillers and vitamins everyday. Observers say that was alarming. What made it even more alarming was the unverified report that the drugs were prescribed by a certain Dr. Conrad Murray.

Manila Standard Today’s Christine Herrera outscooped everyone when she scored an exclusive interview with GMA. It was a casual and brief chat. The former president was in a jovial mood. There was this brief tense moment though when Mrs. Arroyo said, “Well, Clarice – have the lambs stopped screaming?”

Reports say former President Arroyo is in bad shape. The only other thing that’s in worse shape is our economy.

Some people have noticed that due to Mrs Arroyo’s worsening health condition, it looks as if the 64-year-old ex-president has aged by at least 20 years – or as Estelito Mendoza would call it, “presidential pardon.”

Aquino-Cojuangco Video
Have you seen the viral video detailing the alleged sins of the Aquino-Cojuangco family? The video is 15-minute long; with 14 minutes alone devoted to the sins of Kris Aquino.

Wanted: Ramona
The NBI has reportedly started its search for murder suspect Maria Ramona Belen Bautista overseas. It will be an easier task for the NBI to locate Ramona… mostly because she is a Bautista, not a Lacson.

Ali Peek Shot
PBA star Ali Peek has been shot. The suspect was last seen boarding a Cathay Pacific flight to Hong Kong and is believed to be en route to his wife’s home in Turkey.

Albert Henry “Ali” Peek of Talk ‘N Text has been shot. The US Embassy is seeking justice for its citizen!

Talk ‘N Text owner Manny V. Pangilinan is helping the police find the gunman. He is offering a reward of 500 thousand pesos for the capture of Ali Peek’s assailant prompting Genelyn Magsaysay to accuse him of using the shooting incident for publicity.

Hours after Joe Frazier passed away, Regine Velasquez gave birth. It’s been a busy day for Sen. Tito Sotto who demands to see both death and birth certificates ASAP.

Survivor Philippines
GMA Network has launched Season 4 of Survivor Philippines: Celebrity Doubles Showdown. This promises to be the best season yet for the local version of Mark Burnett’s Survivor franchise. Despite Richard Gutierrez.
“In a disordered mind, as in a disordered body, soundness of health is impossible.”

Quotes of the Week
“How would you feel if you knew something was wrong with you but not knowing what it was? I know something is wrong with me.”
~Former President Gloria Macapagal-Arroyo

“Compassion and humanitarian grounds are a convenient excuse. But if we always concede to that, then we will not have a solid justice system.”
~Justice Sec. Leila De Lima

“I need the support of the saints in every locality around the world ,my children are innocent, pls pass !!!”
~Genelyn Magsaysay on Facebook

Manila Standard Today: Arroyo: Not knowing what ails me is killing me

ABS-CBN News: Questions Ramona left unanswered

Merry Christmas! Have a safe day!

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GENELYN MAGSAYSAY broke her silence Sunday. She delivered a 12-minute SONA exclusively shown on GMA 7.

According to Genelyn, Bong Revilla is using the Ramgen murder case to boost his chances in the “2013 presidential elections” Since the presidential elections won’t happen until 2016, Malacañang is verifying intelligence reports that Genelyn is planning to lead an “Oust Aquino Movement” soon.

In a videotaped message, Genelyn Magsaysay addressed the public as, “Mga minamahal ko…” No, thanks!

She added, “Ano po ba ang laban ko sa isang malaking pulitiko.” To which Bong Revilla said, “Mas malaki ka!”

And then Genelyn lectured, “Nais ko pong ipaalala sa mga hindi nakakaintindi na may tatlong sangay ng gobyerno. Ito ang lehislatibo, hukuman, at ehekutibo. Lehislatibo, ang sangay ng gobyerno na gumagawa ng batas; hukuman na siyang nagpapatupad ng batas, at ehekutibo ang nagpapatakbo ng gobyerno at mga sangay nito. Ang mga desisyon at pagpapatakbo ng bawat isa sa mga tao ay dapat malaya sa isa’t isa. Sa madaling salita, walang pakialaman.” Move over Father Joaquin Bernas! There’s a new constitutionalist in town!

Earlier, Genelyn Magsaysay said, “Hindi ko pinalaki at tinuruan ang mga anak ko na magpatayan!” Oh! So were you taught to have an affair with a married man?

Confirmed! Ramona Bautista is already in Turkey. That’s fowl!

And there’s another videotape. This time, the copy was exclusively given to ABS-CBN by Ramona Bin Laden.

Before she left for Turkey, Ramona Bautista produced her own video shown exclusively on ABS-CBN. That explains her absence at Ramgen’s funeral last November 2. She was busy rehearsing her lines.

In the video, Ramona tried to narrate what happened on October 28, the night Ramgen was killed. Not so surprisingly, her story had more versions than the Bible.

Ram Revilla’s girlfriend Janelle Manahan who survived the shooting will undergo facial reconstruction. With Interpol hot on her trail, Ramona Bautista wants one too.

Fliptop Battle: Magsaysay vs. Revilla

Bong Revilla:
Ano bang problema mo? Heto nga’t tumutulong na!
Ang hirap kasi sa ‘yo, isa kang kunsintidora!
Putak ka nang putak, daig mo pa ang manok
Hindi naman bagay sa katawan mong bilog!

Genelyn Magsaysay:
Wow! Kung magsalita ka naman, parang perfect ka ah
Anong ‘pinagmamalaki mo, ‘yang malawak mong panga?
Hoy! Kung gusto mong mag-bise, ‘wag mo kaming gamitin!
Ipaliwanag mo na lang kung sino si Josephine!

Bong Revilla:
Anak ng teteng…
Huwag ka ngang mamersonal at ‘wag ka nang mandawit
Baka nalilimutan mo, minsan ka ring naging kabit!
Wala akong paki, kung kuya mong congressman ay rich
May respeto ako sa babae, kahit “menopausal bitch!”

Genelyn Magsaysay:
Pucha ka! Bakit pati kuya ko ay iyong dinamay
Pinaplastic mo lang pala siya noong gabi ng lamay
‘Wag na ‘wag kang magpapakita rito, kapag si RJ nakalabas
Tingnan ko lang kung makaporma ka sa lalaking naka-Halloween mask!

In Other News
Miss Philippines, Gwendolyn Ruais won first runner-up in the Miss World pageant held in London early Monday morning (Manila time). Congratulations Gwen! You’re the man!

Meanwhile, Miss Philippines Diane Necio won Miss Internet Popularity in the Miss International pageant held last night in China. ‘k.

A grandson of Sen. Juan Ponce Enrile identified as Achilles Juan Ponce Enrile was robbed by the driver of a taxicab he flagged down in Mandaluyong City. When the robber announced, “Holdup ‘to. Ibigay mo sa akin ang pera mo!” Achilles said, “Oh no you don’t! I’m Enrile’s grandson.” The robber retorted, “Ah ganun!? Ibigay mo sa akin ang pera ng bayan!”

Sen. Juan Ponce Enrile’s grandson was robbed by a taxi driver. Sa awa ng Diyos, haping-hapi ang robber!
“Crime is a product of social excess.”
~Vladimir Lenin

Quotes of the Week(end)
“Nakakalungkot. Malayo pa po ang eleksyon. Bakit napakaaga ng kampanya?”
~Genelyn Magsaysay

“Pabalikin mo ang anak mo! Hindi ako naniniwalang hindi mo alam ang pag-alis niya!”
~Sen. Bong Revilla

“I pray for our finances. They are pushing us to the limit. I’m trying to cope, my children are the ones holding our allowance. I’m always the one making abono, they cut off our allowance but they are the ones living luxurious living. They have luxurious cars and houses.”
~Genelyn Magsaysay‘s Facebook status (October)


Briefly Noted
Sunday Inquirer Magazine’s cover yesterday, Nov. 6 was Vicki Belo. The cover says “BELO On Belo & Other Obsessions.” Below it: ENCOUNTER WITH A Mangkukulam

Have a great week! Ingat!

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http://t1.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcQgVtx7AaGH5VdMOYiBeB00bUZW0mtu6HaMqfpkh4iJSXDfvJLH3QTHE ALL SAINTS DAY break is over. The Christmas Season is officially here. In fact, the Alex Boncayao Brigade is getting their cash gift soon!

But first, this: there’s absolutely no truth to rumors that former senator Ramon Revilla Sr. is the father of the 7 billionth baby born on October 31.

Portia Ilagan, the spokesman of the Revilla family said Ramon Revilla Sr. fathered at least 72 children. Sen. Juan Ponce Enrile believes it could have been more had Revilla not “aborted” sperm cells.

Ramon Revilla Sr. has fathered 72 children with 16 different women… officially making Mang Dolphy Quizon a saint.

Former senator Ramon Revilla Sr. was not able to attend Wednesday’s funeral of his murdered son Ram. He was still confined in the hospital although his BP has gone back to normal, 120 over 72 children.

After the funeral, Ram’s mother, “That’s Entertainment” alumna Genelyn Magsaysay told the media she didn’t raise her children to be violent people. And Princess Revilla was like, “Why are you looking at me?”

The Ligots
Former military comptroller Jacinto Ligot and wife, Erlinda have surfaced Wednesday and posted a bail of P160,000 for a string of tax evasion cases. The couple’s lawyer said the Ligots went on a vacation “somewhere in Luzon.” When asked to give more clues, the lawyer said, “Basta! Kung saan ‘di naghanap ang NBI, do’n yun!”

Herman Cain, a former pizza chain CEO and leading Republican presidential candidate is being accused of harassing two women in the mid-1990s. Cain dismissed the issue as a demolition job invented by the camp of Manny Villar.

Here’s a piece of good news. US surgeons successfully separated Filipino conjoined twins Angelica and Angelina Sabuco. The surgery lasted 9 hours, about half an hour shorter than the marriage of Kim Kardashian and Kris Humphries.

Top 10 Things That Have Lasted Longer Than The Kardashian-Humphries Marriage

No. 10: The NCAA games in the Philippines

No. 9: The Ligot couple’s vacation

No. 8: Nora Aunor’s good behavior after her return to the Philippines (May himala!)

No. 7: The UP Fighting Maroons’ losing streak

No. 6: “Happy Yipee Yehey” (Akalain mo ‘yon!)

No. 5: Christopher Lao’s online popularity

No. 4: The Yuletide Season in the Philippines

No. 3: Manny and Jinkee Pacquiao’s latest cold war

No. 2: The time spent by Gloria Macapagal-Arroyo in the hospital after being elected congresswoman

And the No. 1 thing that has lasted longer than Kim and Kris’ marriage…

Noli De Castro’s “TeeeeeeeeeeeeVeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeey Patrol”

The marriage of reality star Kim Kardashian and NBA player Kris Humphries’ lasted 72 days. And James Yap was like, “Puwede pala ‘yon? Sus, kung alam ko lang… ”
“I don’t know why some people get worked up about gay people marrying. It’s not gay people who are ‘ruining the sanctity of marriage.’ It’s celebrities.”
~Craig Ferguson

Quote of Week
“Kung maaari lang po, tugisin niyo ang totoong killer. Huwag niyong gamitin ang pamilya ko. Huwag niyo kaming paikut-ikutin dahil alam mo kung sino ka. Kawawa ang mga anak ko. Kung kayo ay may galit sa akin, ako na lang. huwag niyo nang isama ang mga anak ko. Ang mga anak ko ay mahal na mahal ko.”
~Genelyn Magsaysay, Ram Revilla’s mother

Blogger raises issue of possible plagiarism vs. the Department of Tourism

GMA News: DOT: ‘Plagiarized’ food article was just a test page

Enjoy the rest of the week! Merry Christmas!

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