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THINGY

5 10 2016

FOUL-MOUTHED Philippine president Rodrigo Duterte threatened to “break up with America” and even told President Obama, “You can go to hell!” In response, Obama said, “Thanks for the invite.”

Duterte also lashed out at the European Union (EU) and said, “better choose purgatory, hell is filled up.” The European Union is asking about the context of Duterte’s statement, how Duterte said it, and why Duterte knows so much about hell.

1reddit
Slaughter Them!
It’s less than 90 days before Christmas. Everyone can’t wait for the Yuletide season including President Duterte. In particular, the President is excited about December 28 because on that day he celebrates the slaughter of three million innocents.

Hitler
While defending his all-out war on drugs, President Duterte invoked Nazi leader Adolf Hitler and the Holocaust. His most rabid millennial supporters were like, “What’s Holocaust?”

1teddyboy
Neo-Nazi?
President Duterte recently appointed former congressman Teddyboy Locsin as Philippine ambassador to the United Nations. Locsin is now being criticized online after a tweet he posted last August 22 resurfaced and went viral. In the controversial post, Locsin said, “I believe that the Drug Menace is so big it needs a FINAL SOLUTION like the Nazis adopted. That I believe. NO REHAB.” Locsin has since deleted the tweet which apparently was Duterte’s basis for appointing him to the government in the first place.

Withdrawn
Congressmen have apparently backed down on their plan to show the fake Leila De Lima “sex video” in the next House hearing. The time they spent watching it on RedTube was satisfying enough.

1mark
Busted
Actor Mark Anthony Fernandez has been arrested for alleged possession of a kilo of marijuana. Alma Moreno will have to pray harder.

Mark Anthony Fernandez says he uses marijuana as a “medication to PREVENT cancer.” Doctors who heard the statement concluded, “He’s obviously on drugs.”

Thingy
Someone sent me this letter last Friday.

Hello there! Just call me Maybe.

I really don’t understand. Like, you know. Why?!? Kasi nga, ‘di ba, there’s this letter from our school which came out today encouraging us to wear black sa game on Sunday between Ateneo and La Salle. When I read it, I was like, “Are you effin serious?” Ready na ang shirt ko. I even bought a new one at Powerplant in Rockwell so don’t be KJ, okayyyyy!!!!!???? (I won’t tell the color to protect my school. At ayaw kong ma-bash like, you know.)

An hour ago, my bestie texted, “Let’s go black huh kasi Dad said he’ll be in black.” I refused. Kasi nga, why mix politics and sports? Every year, naka-green or blue naman kapag La Salle vs Ateneo ‘tapos ngayon itim? Baduy.

And they’re talking about this EJK thingy. Fine. They’re killing the poor and the dugyots. But as President Duterte said, they’re addicts naman ‘di ba? They’re a menace to the society. ‘Buti na lang I don’t commute. Kasi baka ‘di ko kayanin ang threats. Like you know, when they’re gonna rob you or snatch your iPhone 7. Scary shit. By the way, there’s an iPhone 7 that exploded na raw. Gosh, I’m effin worried. Should I ask Dad for a new one?

Before some people bash me, let me be clear lang huh. I respect those who are against this EJK thingy. Pero if you wanna express your opposition to it, kayo na lang. It’s not everyone’s thing naman kasi. Besides, I kinda support naman President Duterte when he said na dapat mawala ang mga addicts of this world. I mean, helllllooooo. They’re so katakot naman talaga eh.

1camillenaredo

Aside from this EJK thing, na-mention din sa letter ‘yong Marcos burial issue. Like, helllloooo!!!! Pati ba naman ‘yon isama???? Anong kunek sa game ‘di ba? ‘DI BA???? I know for a fact (yes, nagbabasa naman ako) that Marcos has been frozen for like three decades. Let him rest. Anywhere! Move on na tayo! (Btw, Sandro Marcos’s older brother is a lot cuter. I mean, Sandro is ok by local standards but he’s got this like horrendous grammar so it’s a sorta turn off thingy).

‘Yun lang. I just shared my thoughts. Mas ok nang maging honest ‘di ba? Kesa naman you wear black just for the heck of it. I mean, maayos naman ang human rights ko. My friends and I live a peaceful life naman. We can go to the malls, window shop, eat pizza. We’re so free. And my family’s rights are not being violated naman. So, anong isyu ‘di ba? Feeling ko, medyo OA lang talaga ang reaction ng iba on this human rights thingy. But I respect them.

Done! At least nasabi ko na ang nararamdaman ko. I have to go. I’ll go check Manang muna if naplantsa na niya ‘yong new shirt ko. Can’t wait to watch the game. Wish us luck! XOXO
————————————————————————————————————————————–
“I believe that the war on drugs is a tragically misplaced use of resources – an immoral venture that produces far more suffering than it alleviates.”
~David Harsanyi

Perceived wrongs?
Boo to this noisy Sri Lankan-turned-Filipino (thanks to the late dictator Ferdinand Marcos whom he served well)

1ronnat

Sound Bites
“Sobrang ingay ng pangulo. Tama lang na ipakita niyang galit siya sa droga pero ‘wag na siyang mag-ingay na: ‘Papatayin kita.’ ‘I will kill you.’ Hindi tama iyan. Kaya he is falling on his own sword, nadadapa siya sa kanyang espada dahil salita siya nang salita.”
~Sen. Richard Gordon

Word.

Elsewhere
Propaganda war: Weaponizing the internet by MARIA RESSA
A fake account is a manufactured online identity, sometimes known as a troll depending on the account’s behavior. Not all trolls are part of a paid propaganda campaign, but for now let’s focus on the paid initiatives, which can pay a troll up to P100,000/month.

Poll Results
1poll

I am on Twitter: @HecklerForever.

[Photos: Heil Hitler Digong: Macky Pamintuan; Teddyboy Locsin: Inquirer.net; Mark Anthony Fernandez: Victoria Tulad/GMA News; UAAP: Camille Naredo]

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