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SUSPECTED, SUSPECDEAD

19 07 2016

LAST WEEK, suspected drug lord Peter Lim sought audience with no less than President Duterte to deny his reported involvement in the illegal drugs trade. Netizens cry double standard in the government’s war against illegal drugs. They noted, “‘Pag mahirap ang suspek, patay agad pero ‘pag mayaman, nakikipag-meeting pa sa pangulo.”

The president’s spokesman Martin Andanar quickly denied the allegation.

1DUTERTELim
Peter Lim: Hindi ako drug lord!

Palace: Kay Presidente ka na lang magpaliwanag.

Peter Lim: Ayaw ko nga! Eh kung patayin ako nun?

Palace: Mayaman ka ba o mahirap?

Peter Lim: Mayaman.

Palace: You’re safe.

* * *

Lalaki sa Looban: Hindi ako pusher!

Pulis: Bang!

Lalaki sa Looban:

Pulis: Pasensya. Nanlaban ka eh. Wala akong choice.

* * *

Peter Lim: Hindi ako drug lord!

Palace: Kay Presidente ka na magpaliwanag.

Peter Lim: Si Presidente talaga ang haharap sa akin?!?

Palace: Ayaw mo?!? Choosy?

Peter Lim: Hindi. Excited lang.

* * *

Lalaki sa Kanto: Hindi ho ako pusher sir! Hindi ako pusher!

Pulis: Sa presinto ka na magpaliwanag!

Lalaki sa Kanto: Pwede ho bang kay Presidente na lang?

Pulis: Ambisyoso! Addict ka! Addict!

FullSizeRender
Peter Lim: Hindi ho ako drug lord!

Duterte: Ipapapatay kita ‘pag may nakuha akong ebidensya. Right now, submit yourself to an investigation.

Peter Lim: Hindi mo ako papatayin ngayon sir? Hindi totoo ang banta mo dati?

Duterte:

Peter Lim: Nagtatanong lang sir. Aalis na po ako. Thanks.

* * *

Suspek: Hindi ho ako pusher sir! Hindi ako pusher.

Pulis: Bang!

Suspek: Agad-agad?!?

Pulis: Lumalaban ka pa huh! Bang!

Suspek:

Pulis: Dapat kasi nakikinig kayo sa balita. Ang sabi ng ating pangulo, “I’m the President. I don’t give due process.” Pasensyahan, ‘di ka yata na-inform.

* * *

Peter Lim: Hindi ho ako drug lord!

Duterte: Sa NBI ka na magpaliwanag. Go!

Peter Lim: Go na talaga? As in… I can go? I’m free?!

Duterte:

Peter Lim: Nililinaw ko lang sir. [THANK YOU LORD!!!]

* * *

Pulis: Dapa. Dapa!

Tambay: Hindi ho ako pusher sir! Maawa kayo. Hindi ako pusher! Pakawalan n’yo ako!

Pulis: Anong pangalan mo?

Tambay: Peter sir. Peter Lim.

Pulis:

Tambay: Subok lang sir. Baka sakaling makalusot. Who knows ‘di ba?

New App
The Philippine National Police will activate a text hotline called “Text Bato.” A new Smartphone app which will allow ordinary Filipinos to send messages directly to PNP Chief Ronald “Bato” dela Rosa will also be launched soon. The app is called “Itaga mo sa Bato,” which was shorter and catchier than the original suggestion, “Bato, bato sa langit, ang tamaan… nanlaban.”
________________________________________________________________________________________
“I guess the only time most people think about injustice is when it happens to them.”
~ Charles Bukowski, Ham on Rye

Worst Attendance
Official records show Manny Pacquiao attended only one session during the third and final regular session of the 16th Congress. When asked to justify his absences, Pacquiao said, “Colossians 2:5 For though I am absent from you in body, I am present with you in spirit.”

Sound Bites
“I know that I’m now a subject of incessant vicious attacks in the social media. But I don’t intend to dignify them by probing into who’s behind them and why.”
~Sen. Leila De Lima on the viral video which showed her in a party with QC Rep. Alfred Vargas who was maliciously identified by idiots as detained drug lord Herbert Colangco

Say no to drugs.

I am on Twitter: @HecklerForever.

[Photo: Malacañang]

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One response

19 07 2016
depatridge

Reblogged this on omigacouk.

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