AN INCUMBENT CONGRESSMAN and two other politicians were found to be the registered owners of several firearms confiscated inside the luxury villa of convicted criminal Peter Co in the New Bilibid Prison. Which explains why when you look up the meaning of the word ‘politician’ in the latest edition of the Oxford English Dictionary, it says there, “See criminal.”

Official records reveal a Walther PPK pistol found inside the ‘kubol’ of drug lord Peter Co is registered under the name of Guimaras Rep. Joaquin Carlos Rahman Nava. Sources say Nava can’t wait to deny his links to the convicted drug lord. The public can’t wait to not believe him.

Bilibid Balladeer
Henry Colanggo, the convicted leader of the Waray-Waray and Ozamiz bank robbery group and one of the inmates living in a luxury villa inside the national penitentiary is also a recording artist. In fact, in the recent PMPC Star Awards for Music, he won Best New Male Recording Artist even besting the talented and very popular rapper-songwriter Abra. The award made Colanggo happy but he made the PMPC ha₱₱ier.

Critics say the PMPC had lost its credibility when it gave the award to a convicted robbery gang leader. Which begs the question, what credibility?

Happy, Hopeful Christmas
According to a Social Weather Stations survey, 7 out of 10 Filipinos expect a happy Christmas. The other three were Bong, Jinggoy and Enrile.

In a recent survey, the SWS asked some 1,800 respondents if they were expecting a happy Christmas this year. It’s a YES according to 64 percent of Filipinos in Metro Manila; 72 percent in the rest of Luzon; 71 percent in Mindanao; 72 percent in the Visayas, and 0 percent in the Maximum Security Compound of the New Bilibid Prison.

According to Pulse Asia, 34 percent of Filipinos are expecting a more prosperous Christmas season for their families this year. And the Binays were like, “True!”

The Advice
Speaking before youth members of the Jesus is Lord Church Movement, President Aquino called on the youth to discuss politics and government instead of spending time on selfies and Clash of Clans. Such encouraging words from someone who quit playing video games at the age of 50.

Using UP’s grading system, the Senate subcommittee on public services recently conducted an MRT-3 commuters’ survey. Of the 13 stations, four got a [failing] grade of 5.0: Taft Avenue, Shaw Boulevard, Cubao, and GMA-Kamuning. The Santolan-Annapolis station got a 2.75 while Ayala and Magallanes stations were both given a 2.5. The rest received a grade of 3. When UP students were asked about the MRT survey, they said, “It was fun!” When Ateneo students were asked about the same MRT survey, they replied, “What’s MRT?”

For the first time, US Marine Lance Corporal Joseph Scott Pemberton, the suspect in the murder of transgender Jennifer Laude appeared before the sala of Olongapo City Judge Roline Ginez-Jabalde. Throughout the hearing, Pemberton was noticeably staring at Judge Jabalde, checking if she’s really female.

COLLASimbang Gabi
The annual Simbang Gabi started last Tuesday. Some friends are determined to complete the nine-day series of dawn masses. I’m hoping to see them get promoted to Level 2 Catholic.

Birthday Pope
Last December 17, Pope Francis turned 78. Or as Senator Enrile would say, “So young!”

Online Censorship
The Belarus government has tightened its control of online media. A bill that seeks to shut down online content deemed offensive by the government has been endorsed by Information Minister Titus Sottoshenko.

A recent study has revealed that garbled text messages may be a sign of stroke. Unless the “garbled” messages were sent by some Filipinos. They’re just probably jejenese. Eow kua! muZta na poWz! Klala mo p q? Jejeje #kathnielislove #joshanerocksdavao #jejeje

Sony cancelled the showing of the movie ‘The Interview’ – a political comedy about a fictional plot to kill North Korean dictator Kim Jong-Un after hackers believed to be sponsored by North Korea threatened to launch an attack. Maybe these North Korean wackos can do something about the annual MMFF.
“Equality before the law is probably forever unattainable. It is a noble ideal, but it can never be realized, for what men value in this world is not rights but privileges.”
~ H.L. Mencken

Sound Bites
“Walang problema kahit malaki ang sa kanya, maliit lang sa akin; advantage s’ya ok lang ‘yan.”
~Manny Pacquiao on Mayweather’s proposed purse split in the event of a super fight

“We agree with the prosecution that to allow the accused-movant to leave his detention cell will not only set a bad precedent, but will likewise be regarded as a mockery of the administration of justice.”
~The Sandiganbayan on Jinggoy’s request to spend Christmas in his home.

Happy weekend!

I am on Twitter: @HecklerForever.

[Photos: House of Representatives: Nava; Ivory Records: Colanggo; Rappler: MRT; Philippine Star: Simbang Gabi; Sony: The Interview]

Author: professionalheckler

See About the Heckler

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