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EXCLUSIVE: SECRET TWEETS EXPOSED

14 02 2014

WITH THE HELP of Julian Assange and Edward Snowden, we were able to access private Valentine-related tweets of some local personalities. We are making them public for the first time. Enjoy!

bakya
ThePresidentNoy:
@MrPalengke Pssst! Saan ang lakad n’yo ni @RatedK ngayong Valentine? Galingan mo na kasi para makabuo na kayo. Good luck!

MrPalengke:
@ThePresidentNoy Hindi naman ako ang may problema eh. Ayaw mabuntis ni @RatedK. Masisira raw ang figure. Ang laki na kasi ng nagagastos sa Cohen diet. Kaya heto, diet rin ako sa *bleep* lolz

RatedK:
@MrPalengke Are you even aware that when you tag someone, mababasa nila ang tweets mo? SMH! I’m sorry @ThePresidentNoy pero wala ka nang pakialam sa sex life namin ni @MrPalengke! Get a life!

ThePresidentNoy:
@RatedK Sorry, na-hack yata ang account ko. Hindi ako ‘yon.

bob
RubiTuasonSocialite:
@Sexy It’s the month of love. Please forgive me for testifying against you Jinggoy. Hindi na kasi kaya ng konsensya ko. Regards na lang kay Mareng @DoctoraLoi !

Sexy:
@RubiTuasonSocialite Gago! Malaki ang naitulong sa ‘yo ni Mommy @DoctoraLoi! Sabay pa kayong nagpapa-botox noon tapos tatraydurin mo s’ya?! Kapal ng mukha mo!

DoctoraLoi:
@RubiTuasonSocialite ‘Wag mo akong ma-mare-mare! Walanghiya ka! Pati si Mareng @JustaTantocoSocialite idinamay mo pa. Tamaan ka sana ng kidlat. #getlost

TwitterOfficial:
We’re sorry to inform you @RubiTuasonSocialite that you can no longer access the tweets of @JustaTantocoSocialite and @DoctoraLoi. You’ve been blocked.

AmazingKap:
@CongLani happy valentines day babe. mamaya, sunduin kta dyan. hatid ko lang si lani sa gma taping. maligo ka ha tapos suot mo ang binili kong biquini bikenee bikini. #exsited

CongLani:
@AmazingKap wrong send ka na naman pa! gusto mo bang ako na lang ang mag-tweet sa kanya? alam ko ang twitter account ng babaeng ‘yan.

AmazingKap:
@CongLani sweeeeeetheart! soorrrrrrrri! na-click ko lang. babawi aq later. pramis. sa yo naman ako uuwi 2nyt eh. sorry ulit. i love u!

CHENX
JustJanet
namis ko ang party sa heretage pag valntines Day. marami kaming iniinvyt na artista tapos kinakantahan pa ako ni darling @HighMeNapoles. kinilig talaga ako. mukhalang tanga. hihihi

HighMeNapoles:
@JustJanet wag monang ipaalalasa kin. nasisinti ako. ingat ka na lang jan swethart.

Bnay2016:
Good news ngayong Valentine’s Day! Isa na namang OFW ang nasagip natin mula sa tiyak na kamatayan sa ibang bansa. Salamat sa Diyos. Mabuhay ang mga bagong bayani!

MrPalengke:
@Binay2016 whatever. #lahatnalanginaannounce #ehdiIKAWna

SimplyNancy:
@MrPalengke Unfair! Lahat na lang pinupuna n’yo. Kahit anong gawin ng daddy ko, minamasama n’yo at binibigyan ng kulay. #blackpropaganda

JusticeSec:
… is in a relationship. Slam Dunk Love!

Binay2016:
@JusticeSec sus. ‘yan ka na naman sa slam dunk na ‘yan.

JusticeSec:
@Binay2016 why belittle my ability to fall in love? why can’t you just be happy for me?

Tanda
All4JuanPonce:
@Galunggong ‘musta mama g? I will you call you later when you wake up. happy valentine’s day. 14344 5254! missing you so much.

Galunggong:
@All4JuanPonce hey! i’m still awake. happy birthday! I can’t sleep. 4:30am here. tawag ka na daddy. #sad #alone #scared #when #will #we #see #each #other #again #hu #hu #hu

All4JuanPonce:
@Galunggong kailangang palamigin pa natin nang konti ang isyu. basta, ‘wag kang bibitaw. nandito lang ako. #YouandMeAgainsttheWorld love you. KIT!

Galunggong:
@All4JuanPonce what’s KIT?

All4JuanPonce:
@Galunggong Keep In Touch hihihi

Galunggong:
@All4JuanPonce baduy mo daddy! #oldschool hehehe

iamMiriam:
Hijo de pu… LORD! Why do you allow such debauchery? Why?!?

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Erapsyon:
ito ang pnakaayaw kong pitsa sa lahat. valentines day. ang daming dapat bigyan ng flowers. pag di mo nabigyan, magtatampo. hayyy mga babae talaga! #pogiproblems

Tanda:
@Erapsyon pare, ikaw ang expert eh. ano bang mas ok ibigay kay @Galunggong darling ko: Flowers o chocolates?

Erapsyon:
@Tanda manong, sa mga panahong ito, hindi flowers o chocolates ang kailangan niya. ang importante: puso! #TangInaAngCheesyKo #AkoBaTalagaIto

DoctoraLoi:
Tumahimik ka na @Erapsyon! Kinikilabutan ako.

Krissy:
@ThePresidentNoy I hate you naaaa. You forgot my birthday palaaaa. Why? Busy ka ba sa love life mo!? As if! Aha-ha-ha!

ThePresidentNoy:
@Krissy ‘Wag ka nga rito mag-tantrum. ‘Tawagan kita mamaya. Delete mo na ‘yang tweet mo! Nakakahiya.

DRealDniece:
@Vhongga pssst. kuya, umalis na c zeddrick. punta ka na sa condo. dala ka kropeck and duct tape tapos laruin ko flappy bird mo.

Vhongga:
@DRealDniece ULOL!

LhitoLapid:
Paramdam lang. Senador pa rin me 4 you’re information hihihi. Sarap kayang maging senador. Sarap matulog don, airconed hihihi hashtag jokesonly hihihihi

VALENTINE
Humor Trumps Looks
According to a recent SWS study, in choosing a partner, 90 percent of adult Filipinos (both male and female) choose sense of humor over good looks. Those adult Filipinos are called liars.

For 2016?
DILG Secretary Mar Roxas has reportedly hired the services of an American political strategist to enhance his public image. The first step towards achieving this is to enhance Korina Sanchez’s image.

Innocent?
An unverified survey showed 1 out of 4 believed Jinggoy Estrada’s claim that he never pocketed a single centavo from his pork barrel allocation. That one was identified as Jinggoy Esrada.

Scary
A study conducted by University of Tennessee researchers found that four species of crocodiles can climb trees — which are nothing compared to a species of crocodiles in the Philippines which can run for public office.
—————————————
“We hang the petty thieves and appoint the great ones to public office.”
~ Aesop

5Congratulations!
For making it that far, for making us all proud, for showing the world your immense talent, thank you Michael Christian Martinez!

Sound Bites
“I feel like a real champion.”
~Filipino Winter Olympian Michael Christian Martinez moments after making it to the Top 24

ruby jinggoy
“After I split from my husband, Mike Arroyo and I were not really you know talking because when I caught my husband (cheating) I burned all his clothes, all his things. I burned it all. All 100 pairs of his Italian shoes. All his suits and that got him (FG Arroyo) upset on why I did that. We had a falling out…Na upset sila sa akin. Buti nga hindi siya ang sinunog ko. Na cre-cremate siya nang buhay na buhay.”
~Socialite Ruby Tuason on ex-husband Butch Tuason and his first cousin Mike Tuason Arroyo

Have a safe weekend! Happy Valentine’s Day!

I am on Twitter: @HecklerForever.

[Photos: Reuters, Guyspeed.com, Rappler, Toonpool.com, PDI]

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