A STRONG EARTHQUAKE hit Bohol, Cebu, and other parts of the Visayas and Mindanao Tuesday morning. Phivolcs reported it was likely caused by the East Bohol fault. Malacañang believed however, it was GMA’s fault.

Because of the magnitude 7.2 earthquake, several houses were damaged. Both houses of Congress can relate.

Some superstitious people said Mother Nature was punishing us. But destruction via an earthquake was totally unnecessary. We already have our lawmakers.

Witnesses saw how churches, houses, landmarks and buildings got destroyed. Some residents panicked when things started falling: lampposts, walls, roofs, ceilings, and President Aquino’s satisfaction rating.

According to the latest SWS survey, President Aquino’s net satisfaction rating plunged to 49 percent in September from 64 percent in June. The big drop was a big blow to the President’s ego, his team, and Mar Roxas’s chances in 2016.

It was a huge 15-point loss for President Aquino’s net satisfaction rating. Supporters and fans of the President are blaming Aljon Mariano.

You know things are getting bad when the President’s hairline is now higher than his net satisfaction rating.

Pork Survey
The latest Pulse Asia survey showed 67 percent of Filipinos believe that misuse of pork barrel funds has continued under the present administration. The remaining 33 percent need to have their brains checked.

The same survey revealed that 45 percent of respondents wanted the pork barrel system abolished. The rest were lawmakers.

Global HWD
October 15 is Global Handwashing Day. Since Janet Napoles’s racket was exposed though, some prominent people have been observing this… everyday!

In Washington DC…
President Obama’s approval rating is down to 37 percent. President Aquino felt so relieved.

Picture! Picture!
Ano ang pinag-uusapan ng dalawa?
A: “Wow naman Senator. Ito ba ang listahan ng mga tumanggap ng DAP? Number 1 kayo ah. Congrats po!”

“Sus! Wala ‘yan. What’s 100 million? Hihihi!”

B: “Naku Sir, kayo ba ‘tong nasa picture kasama si Ms Janet Napoles. You’re friends pala huh.”

“Grabe ka naman Megan, ang bilis mong mag-conclude. Aksidente lang ang pagkikita namin. I don’t know that woman!”

C: “Sige Senator, tutungo ako para kunwari hindi tayo nag-uusap. Isa lang naman ang hiling ko sa inyo: imbitahan n’yo sa Senado si Napoles. Bakit ba umiiwas kayo?!”

“Sige Megan, ngingiti rin ako para kunwari hindi ako inis sa ‘yo. Bakit ba nakikialam ka?”

INC Event
The medical-dental mission of the religious sect Iglesia ni Cristo in the city of Manila was a huge success as more than 1.5M people showed up. During the day-long event, the INC distributed relief goods, provided medical and dental care, , and impressed politicians. Mission accomplished.

Gay Test
With an existing ban on homosexuals, the so-called Gulf Corporation Countries: Bahrain, Qatar, Oman, Saudi Arabia and the United Arab Emirates have started to implement a “gay test” on travelers to detect “non-straights.”. One of the questions in the test goes, “Are you a fan of My Husband’s Lover?”
“No matter how much falls on us, we keep plowing ahead. That’s the only way to keep the roads clear.”
~Greg Kincaid

FYI: Magnitude and Intensity
Magnitude and Intensity measure different characteristics of earthquakes. Magnitude measures the energy released at the source of the earthquake. Magnitude is determined from measurements on seismographs. Intensity measures the strength of shaking produced by the earthquake at a certain location. Intensity is determined from effects on people, human structures, and the natural environment. /via USGS

Sound Bites

Our thoughts are with the victims of the strong earthquake in the Visayas and Mindanao. This too shall pass.

I am on Twitter: @HecklerForever.

[Photos: Robert Michael Poole, Ayee Macaraig, @SenMiriam]

Author: professionalheckler

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