GUESTING on a comedy show, lawyer Lorna Kapunan reveals she has a love life, and she’s sexually-active. Thousands of sexless viewers heaved a sigh of relief. There’s still hope. THERE’S STILL HOPE!
In a purported Facebook post, lawyer Jessica Lucila ‘Gigi’ Reyes claimed that the camp of her former boss, Juan Ponce Enrile betrayed her. But analysts say this “Gigi felt betrayed by JPE” moment is on page 4 of a 50-page unpublished zarzuela script.
Lawyer Gigi Reyes felt betrayed by Juan Ponce Enrile. To which Cristina Ponce Enrile said, “Ako rin!”
HERE are excerpts from Gigi Reyes’ Facebook ‘rant’ (Via ABS-CBNNews.Com).
(At ang hindi awtorisadong salin nito sa Filipino).
“I left the country last August 31 to seek some peace and quiet.”
(Akala ko makakalusot. Syet!)
“Some elements from the media have attempted to get to our residence pretending to be my relatives.”
(Mga dugyot! Makikinis kami! Alam ng mga guwardiya namin ang kamag-anak o hindi!)
“The Philippine Daily Inquirer, in particular, has been especially cruel.”
(Tama ang desisyon kong mag-subscribe na lang sa Daily Tribune!)
“It is apparent that the PDI and several other media outlets have trained their focus on me.”
(Hindi ko kasalanang maging maganda at powerful! May asim pa naman ako. In fairness to me.)
“True enough, THE WORST BLOW HAS JUST BEEN DEALT UPON ME BY NO LESS THAN THE CAMP OF SENATOR JUAN PONCE ENRILE- THE MAN I SERVED WITH FULL DEDICATION, HONESTY AND LOYALTY FOR 25 YEARS.”
(‘Sensya na boss. Hindi ko masabi ang word na “love.” Hurt ako nang slight eh. Iti-text ko na lang.)
“A certain Atty. Enrique dela Cruz has been doing the media rounds saying that Senator Enrile did not give his blessings to any of the acts I performed on his behalf. He directly accused me of doing things without the Senator’s knowledge.”
(Tanga lang ang peg ng abogadong ‘to. Gusto niya kaming pag-awayin ni boss. Hellllllow! 25 years is 25 years!)
“IF INDEED THESE STATEMENTS ARE SANCTIONED BY OR COMING FROM MY FORMER BOSS, THEN NOTHING CAN BE WORSE THAN THIS KIND OF TRAVESTY AND BETRAYAL.”
(Pero sure akong ‘di niya magagawa ‘yon. Sure na sure na sure. Ayaw ko nang magbigay ng detalye. Basta. Sa ‘ming dalawa na lang ‘yon.)
“I have earned the bitter ire and enmity of some people by and large because and in defense of Senator Juan Ponce Enrile.”
(To quote Ate Guy in ‘The Flor Contemplacion Story,’ “I did not kill… anybody!” Ngunit kung kasalanan man ang magmahal – humihingi ako ng tawad.)
“I have lost contact with Senator Enrile…”
“The last time I spoke to the Senator from abroad… he even told me to be strong.”
“… that we will fight together.”
“I never once thought that this day would come.”
(Gaga ka kasi Janet! Gaga ka!)
“I have every intention to defend myself…”
(Mapera ako! May pambayad ako ng abogado. Tse!)
“I have faith in GOD and my fate rests solely in His Hands and in His Divine Mercy.”
(In fairneeeeeeeess, religious na ulit ako. Pak!)
UPDATE: Senate Minority Leader Juan Ponce Enrile on Monday insisted he did NOT betray his former Chief of Staff Gigi Reyes. When Gigi Reyes heard this, she changed her Facebook status from “It’s Complicated” to “In A Relationship.”
IN OTHER News…
On Monday, Sept. 23, Janet Lim-Napoles was arraigned at the Makati City RTC. Napoles entered a plea of “not sexually active.”
In the metro and in Luzon, the past few days have been wet. Lorna Kapunan can relate.
Due to the autumnal equinox which signals change in seasons, nights will be longer starting Tuesday, Sept. 24. Again, nights will be longer. And Lorna Kapunan was like, “I luvettt!”
Mark Joseph Tajo Solis, a graduate student from UP is in hot water these days. A multiple photo contest winner, it turned out that his winning entries were stolen. This kid has a bright future in politics.
Reports say Mark Joseph Solis stole someone else’s work five times. His family was embarrassed. His friends were shocked. Tito Sotto felt proud.
On his LinkedIn Profile, Mark Solis says he works as a Legislative Officer at Sen. Pia Cayetano’s office. On Twitter though, the senator immediately clarified that Solis was no longer connected with her office. She also denied telling Mark “to be strong” and “we will fight together.”
Sexually Active… Too?
On Facebook, Anonymous Incorporated posted this undated photo of Juan Ponce Enrile and his ex-Chief of Staff Gigi Reyes
Kung ito ay remake ng isang pelikula, ano ang angkop na pamagat?
A: Temptation Island
B: Saan Nagtatago ang Pag-ibig
C: Crazy, Stupid, Love
D: Diligin Mo ng Suka ang Uhaw na Lumpia
“Older women are best because they always think they may be doing it for the last time.”
“If he can prove to me that Janet Napoles had lunch with the President, I would resign. If he doesn’t prove his claim, he should apologize to us.”
~ Presidential Spokesperson Edwin Lacierda on Kit Tatad
Have a safe week!
I am on Twitter: @HecklerForever.
[Photos: Philippine Daily Inquirer, Philippine Star, Anonymous Inc, Pixel Offensive]