LINGAYEN-DAGUPAN Archbishop Socrates ‘Soc’ Villegas was elected president of the Catholic Bishops’ Conference of the Philippines. The purple smoke that emerged from the chimney of the Pope Pius XII Catholic Center in Paco signaled the election of CBCP’s new president. The purple smoke was produced by burning a copy of the RH Law.

In a homily last year, Archbishop Soc Villegas said, “My dear youth, contraception is corruption.” Nag-condom lang, corruption kaagad? ‘Di ba pwedeng careful lang muna?

Of the newly-elected CBCP president, Archbishop Emeritus Oscar Cruz said, “One thing is certain… Villegas will not keep quiet.” You taught him well.

Simple Life
Pope Francis says bishops and nuns must choose “humble” cars and shun flashy ones. To which, Filipino bishops replied, “Ang KJ huh!”

According to a study conducted by the Japan International Cooperation Agency, the Philippines is losing 2.4 billion pesos in potential income a day because of traffic jams. Dan Brown sort of feels vindicated.

Because of monstrous traffic congestion, the Philippines is reportedly losing billions of pesos in income per day. But that’s nothing compared to millions of Filipinos who are losing patience, hope, and sanity on the road everyday.

Nursing Exam
Almost 22,000 examinees flunked the recent licensure exam for nurses. Related: BPO industry bullish on growth this year

Britain’s Andy Murray won the Wimbledon men’s singles championship. Before Murray, the last Brit to win the title was Frederick John Perry in 1936! It’s been that long. To give you an idea of how long it was, Juan Ponce Enrile was still in Grade 6 when that happened.

1UAAP Season 76
For the first time in 19 years, the Ateneo Blue Eagles started the UAAP season with a 0-3 win-loss slate. The Blue Eagles are now in the bottom of the standings – or as the UP Fighting Maroons would call it, “hangout.”

The Fighting Maroons were in fact the first team to absorb three straight losses this season. To be fair to Ateneo, it is just being consistent… in chasing UP.

Last July 7, the De La Salle Green Archers beat the Ateneo Blue Eagles. After the game, Ateneo alum and presidential communications secretary Ricky Carandang tweeted, “Congratulations La Salle. Enjoy it while you can because it won’t last long.” Some irate La Sallians replied, “Talk about your post!”

According to the latest Social Weather Stations Survey, 39 percent of Filipinos remain optimistic. The rest were Ateneans.

The latest SWS study revealed 39 percent of Filipinos expect a better quality of life this year. Maynilad and Manila Water Company executives said, “Kami rin!”
“Do you wish to rise? Begin by descending. You plan a tower that will pierce the clouds? Lay first the foundation of humility.”
~ St. Augustine of Hippo

Sound Bites
“A car is necessary to do a lot of work, but please, choose a more humble one. If you like the fancy one, just think about how many children are dying of hunger in the world.”
~Pope Francis to priests and nuns

Have a great week!

I am on Twitter: @HecklerForever.

[Photos: and ABSCBNNews.Com]

Author: professionalheckler

See About the Heckler


Say something...

Please log in using one of these methods to post your comment: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: