CITING JAMBY MADRIGAL’s tough stance against corruption, President Aquino likened her to boxer Mike Tyson. Dear Mr. President, Kesyo Jamby Madrigal, Mike Tyson agad? ‘Di ba pwedeng Laila Ali muna?”

1ndDonaire Loses
The Filipino Flash, Nonito Donaire Jr. lost his WBA super bantamweight title to Cuba’s Guillermo Rigondeaux. Reporters are verifying rumors that Donaire recently changed his religion.

Before Sunday’s fight, Donaire was undefeated for 12 long years – which was really nothing compared to the Binays of Makati who are undefeated for 26 years.

Just last week, Brian Viloria lost his fight. This week, Nonito Donaire was beaten. They say it comes in threes. Jamby Madrigal is worried.

According to Compubox, Rigondeaux landed 129 of 396 punches while Donaire, who tasted his first defeat in 30 fights landed only 82 of 352 punches. Moral of the story: Do not eat fries. Fries are unhealthy; bad for the body.

After 12 rounds, all three judges scored the bout for Rigondeaux: 114-113, 115-112, and 116-111. The decision of the board of judges is final unless the Supreme Court of the Philippines intervenes and issues a status quo ante order.

For Filipino boxing fans, the fight was excruciating to watch. The only thing more excruciating was Dyan Castillejo’s live annotation and analysis.

The Donaire-Rigondeaux fight lasted 12 rounds. ABS-CBN’s commercials lasted 12 days.

Top 7 Reactions to Nonito Donaire Jr’s Loss

No. 7: Gloria Macapagal-Arroyo: “Baka shabihin ng preshidente n’yo, kashalanan ko na naman ‘yan. Shumoshobra na sha!”

No. 6: Jackie Enrile: “Grabe ang ginawa ng kalaban niya. Demolition job!”

No. 5: Chiz Escudero: “Natalo man, hindi man napanatili ang korona, sa tingin ko ay hindi ‘yon dahilan para yurakan ang kanyang pagkatao.”

No. 4: Cynthia Villar: “Hindi ko kilala si Rigondeaux. Pero hindi naman kailangang gano’n kapopular para manalo ka.”

No. 3: Nancy Binay: “Wala akong oras para mag-react. Busy po ako sa kampanya. Magre-react na lang ako sa privilege speech ko sa Senado.”

No. 2: ER Ejercito “Hindi lang boksingero si Rigondeaux. Cuban rin siya. At hindi siya basta-bastang Cubano! Gold medalist siya sa 2000 Olympics! Gold medalist siya sa 2004 Olympics!”

And the No. 1 reaction to Donaire’s loss…

Migz Zubiri: “Nakausap ko po si Nonito mismo after the fight. Inamin po niya sa akin na isa siyang battered boxer.”

Quick Count
According to the Commission on Elections, the winners in the May 13 polls will likely be known within 48 hours. Unless of course the elections are held in Imus, Cavite which takes three years or more to determine the winner.

North vs. South
North Korea threatened to launch missiles aimed at South Korea. As a preemptive measure, South Korea launched Psy’s second single, ‘Gentleman.’
“Boxers, like prostitutes, are in the business of ruining their bodies for the pleasure of strangers.”
~(Irish) Wayne Kelly

Sound Bites
“I apologize. I have no excuse. He beat me tonight. I gave it all I got. I never studied the fight and I should have.”
~Nonito Donaire Jr.

NBA legend Kobe Bryant will be out for 9 months. He just had a successful surgery to repair his torn left Achilles’ tendon. Get well soon Black Mamba!


Have a safe week everyone!

I am on Twitter: @HecklerForever.

Author: professionalheckler

See About the Heckler

3 thoughts on “BOXERS”

  1. buddhist jamby madrigal being compared to mike tyson by p-noy.
    weird analogy.
    thats like comparing p-noy to dennis rodman.
    also weird, but for different reasons.

    “To hang out in a gay bar or put on a
    sequined halter top makes me feel like a
    total person.”
    Dennis Rodman
    friend of kim jong un and no doubt cross dressing generals.
    marcos would have loved him


  2. Iron-y, p-noy and binay.

    First it is p-noy who compares madrigal to “iron man” mike tyson! He certainly know how to flatter a woman!

    So vp binay then jumps on the bandwagon and insults “iron lady” margaret thatcher by comparing nonentity nancy to the oxford scholar, industrial chemist, tax lawyer, global change agent, 20th century icon. Binay once again proving he is as bright as his daughter! maybe binay meant nancy was the ironing lady. that makes more sense for the p.a./gofer/housemaid


    “Iron duke” – master army strategist the duke of wellington – paranoid serial coup plotter trillanes would love to inflate his ego even further with that moniker!

    “Iron maiden” – old torture device – james yap has already awarded that to kris aquino.

    “Ironside” – aka super prosecutor perry mason – situation/position vacant. De lima is the patron saint of fugitives.

    “I have to run like a fugitive to save the life I live
    I’m gonna be Iron like a Lion in Zion
    I’m on the run but I ain’t got no gun”
    Bob marley


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