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THE EPAL QUIZ II

29 08 2012

“The truth is, attention seekers are looking for validation. They want to know that they are worthy.”
~Author Unknown


1: Ayon sa larawan, may ‘Good News’ daw mula sa Kongreso! Question: Ano ‘yon?
A: Pinapayagan nang idisplay ang mukha ng chief of staff sa billboards at tarps
B: Hindi lang pagpapalawak ng kalye ang allowed; pagpapalawak rin ng papel
C: Extended hanggang Book 5 ang ‘Walang Hanggan’ ni Goma.


2: Question: Anong tanong ang unang pumasok sa iyong isip nang makita mo ang larawang ito?
A: Libreng scholarship, libreng training, libreng pagpapagamot, at libreng Mercury Drug?!? Namimigay na pala ngayon ng drug store sa Quezon City??
B: Wala bang nararamdaman ni katiting na hiya ang mga Castelo kapag nakikita nila ang kanilang mukha at pangalan sa kabi-kabilang billboard?
C: Wala. ‘Yan ang sagot sa B. Final answer.


3: It’s Passporting Day! Libreng passport! Wow. Question: Ano ang relevance ng higanteng larawan ng kongresista sa proyekto?
A: That’s her passport to a fresh term in Congress.
B: Kung wala ang larawan niya, ulap lang ang makikita. Sayang ang space.
C: Wala kang karapatang kwestyunin si Congresswoman. Apat na oras ‘yan sa parlor. So pleease… appreciate naman the effort.


4: Ang larawang ito ay kuha malapit sa Basilica Minore De Peñafrancia sa Naga City. Question: Kailangan ba talagang naka-imprenta lagi ang pangalan ni Joel Villanueva sa lahat ng tarps ng TESDA?
A: Natural! Alangan namang pangalan mo ang ilagay! Sino ka ba? ‘Di ka naman senatoriable. Siyempre, pangalan niya!
B: Luke 23:34 Ama, patawarin mo siya sapagkat hindi niya nalalaman ang kaniyang ginagawa.
C: Kung makareklamo naman kayo, daig n’yo pa ang presidente! Kung si Pangulong Aquino nga, tinu-tolerate siya, who are you to complain?


5: Question: Kung bibigyan ka ng pagkakataong magtanong kay Manila Councilor Ramon Morales, ano ang itatanong mo?
A: Konsehal, pera n’yo ba ang ipinambili sa firetuck?
B: Hindi ba na-insecure si Mayor Lim dahil mas maliit ang kanyang pangalan?
C: Kung aalisin ba ang pangalan n’yo sa firetruck, hindi ba ito tatakbo?


6: Question: Anong ibig sabihin nito?
A: Move over Sinandomeng, Wagwag, at Milagrosa. Heto na ang bagong variety, ‘Jonvic Remulla.’ Yum! Yum! Yum!
B: Kapag ang palay naging bigas, may bumayo… pulitiko!
C: Kung nabubuwisit ka sa label, eh ‘di ‘wag mong tanggapin! You have a choice: prinsipyo o pagkain?


7: Question: May mas gagarapal pa ba sa supposedly registration notice na ito sa Baclaran?
A: Meron. ‘Yong mukha ng wannabe congressman.
B: Hindi ko na problema ‘yan. Hindi ako taga-Baclaran!
C: Ayaw ni Winnie Castelo ng ganyan. He hates competition.


8: Sabi ng alkalde: Linisin Ikarangal ang Maynila. Anong sagot mo sa kanya?
A: You first!
B: O, anong kaepalan ‘to Mayor? Tanggalin mo na ‘yan.
C: O, gabi na. Bakit nand’yan pa rin ang mukha mo mayor?


9: Question: Anong masasabi mo sa proyektong ito ni Laguna Rep. Ivy Arago?
A: Why not? Ilang pares na boto rin ‘yan ‘noh! Sayang.
B: Para-paraan.
C: Mapapalampas ko na sana eh, kaya lang biglang nag- “I’ll VY With You Forever” Naknampoodle. Ang korni mo! ‘Kainis!


10: Question: Anong angkop na pamagat sa larawang ito?
A: Posteng yawa!
B: Here lies… Councilor Vincent Belmonte
C: Singkapal ng bato, sing-epal ng isang blokeng semento!

For a chance to win happiness, expose these EPAL politicians! Tama na, sobra na, tigilan na! No to EPALiticians!

In Other News
On Twitter, Camarines Sur Governor LRay Villafuerte’s son JULIO wondered if the late DILG Sec. Jesse Robredo had any major accomplishments. After a barrage of criticisms, Julio tweeted an apology – making it his first major accomplishment in life thus far.

New DILG Chief
President Aquino is being pressured to immediately appoint a new DILG Secretary to replace the late Jesse Robredo. The President is reportedly left with only two choices: Balay and Samar.

Harry in Trouble
Apparently, there’s a Prince Harry naked video somewhere. And Vicki Belo was like, “Don’t look at me.”

Quotes of the Weak
“Been reading Jess Robredo tweets for weeks now. Someone please inform me of any major accomplishments Jess has done, coz I don’t know any.”
~Julio Villafuerte, son of Camarines Sur Governor LRay Villafuerte and grandson of Rep. Luis R. Villafuerte, Sr. (via Twitter)

Holes
NASA’s Mars Curiosity rover reportedly dug a deep hole. Unfortunately, that was nothing compared to the hole Tito Sotto dug for himself.

Enjoy the rest of the week!

I am on Twitter: @HecklerForever.

————————–
For the images used in the Epal Quiz II, thank you so much:
Epal Watch, No More Epal FB Page, Support the Anti-Epal Bill FB Page, Mary Jane Cruz, Reyfrancis Cosico, Wiggi Sanarez, @BenTCinco, @JannsMed, @mendozil, @dkarlocastro, and @mlsmedina.

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55 responses

29 08 2012
leslie

share ko po sa FB 🙂

Like

29 08 2012
Del

yung picture ni Thrishia Bonoan David, picure pa niya nung tumakbo siya nung 1998, hahaha. Matagal na yan, di pa nagbabago itsura.

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31 08 2012
aiken

oo nga, gamit na nya since sk pa hehe

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29 08 2012
Libertas

Julio villafuerte
“I was out of the loop”

“Never ruin an apology with an excuse.”
― Benjamin Franklin

Another inbred ingrate without a braincell to his name. He should try working for a living, not spending the taxpayers money which his father stole.

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31 08 2012
senior60

a person is deemed innocent until proven guilty, can you produce evidences libertas if called to testify in court?

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29 08 2012
senior carlos

kung meron ng epal law sitahin mo ang mga nandito sa blog mo! kaya lang panukala pa lamang eh, so ano ang masama doon? ikaw ang mali at hindi alam ang ginagawa. puros ka lang batikos pero hindi nagbibigay serbisyo sa tao. paki post mo nga itong note na ito kung kaya mo?!
salamat!

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31 08 2012
aiken

masama dahil taxes mo yun.. picture mo dapat andun, not the politician

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31 08 2012
senior60

” kung meron ng epal law” bakit sisitahin ni “mo” ang mga nandito sa kanyang blog, sa anong kadahilanan senior carlos

o ano ngayon, na post na “note” mo, nakayanan ni “mo”

akala mo ha hahaha sana correct interpretation ko

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29 08 2012
Jeannie

Sa Caloocan City (especially doon sa kahabaan ng Kabatuhan Road sa Deparo), nakaukit ang yellow smiley emoticon with bigote ni Mayor Echiverri sa mga bangketa, hehe. I don’t have the pic to show you pero I guess andoon pa yun kasi natapos ang road construction just before election 2010. Kung hindi pa nasira ang mga kalsada, mapicturan nga pag-uwi ko ng ma-ishare;) Just after Typhoon Ondoy in 2009 (syempre before election 2010), namigay sa barangay para sa mga nasalanta at para maalalang handog iyon ng mapagmalasakit na local government, naroroon sa bawat plastic ng relief goods ang picture ng sino pa? Syempre, ng butihing Mayor ng Caloocan…what a relief!

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29 08 2012
phreddox

Yang mga Villafuerte number 1 epal yan sa Camarines Sur. One major accomplishment ni Sec Robredo? Keeping the Villafuerte clan’s dirty hands off Naga City for two decades now and counting!

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29 08 2012
getmad

please lang, kayong marunong magcrop sa computer, please do this…lahat ng mga poilikong gumamit ng tarp na may larawan ni sec jesse, puede bang ilagay nyo yung pix ng politikong epal sa pix ni sec jesse… at ilagay ang mga salitang…thank you, goodbye, paalam…. para mamaalam na sila sa mga constituents nila…please lang!

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30 08 2012
yangiwei

Like

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29 08 2012
mcfitch

Slow-clap. Looking forward to Epal Quiz III

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29 08 2012
senior60

agree ako kay julio, wala pa naman talaga, maybe kung hindi pa siya kinuha ni Lord kaagad malamang magkakaroon siguro

siguro na konsensya si noynoy dahil the late robredo went to cebu in lieu of him kaya todo kanyang pagbigay pugay

sa kabaitan, no doubt, makikita naman

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30 08 2012
bata06

senior, dun mo sabihin yan sa constituents ng naga. sa dami ng nakipag libing at nag attended ng wake nya hindi ka mahihirapang mag tanong hahahaha. Ang tanong ko sayo, kaya mo ba pangatawanan yang opinyon mo sa harap nila, o kaya mo lang pumuna?

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3 09 2012
senior60

ah bata at telly, ang pinaguusapan natin dito ay buong pilipinas ha at hindi naga lang, at tsaka “major” accomplishments, at sige nga, one major accomplishment lang for the entire philippines at baka nga hindi ko nabasa dahil wala talaga kaming dyaryo, am relying only sa computer, news sa 7 at tsaka dito kay mister heckler

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31 08 2012
telly bernardo

senior60 – Di ka ba nagbabasa ng dyaryo? Sangkatutak na ang binanggit na mga “accomplishments” ng yumaong DILG Sec. Jesse Robredo, di mo pa rin alam?

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29 08 2012
senior60

iyang mga kaepalan na iyan can be seen nationwide

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29 08 2012
senior60

hahaha buong akala ko talaga babae si winnie castelo

si precious hipolito ba ay isang dating artista

Like

3 09 2012
mba (@marielliba)

Yup! Taga-That’s Entertainment dati si Precious Hipolito. According to Wikipedia, Wednesday group siya, kasama nina Romnick Sarmienta, Sheryl and Sunshine Cruz, Rachel Alejandro, and Jojo Alejar.

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29 08 2012
Bituing marikit

I didn’t realize Lucy Torres Gomez learns fast to be epal….oh well,have to lower my expectations.politics becomes lucrative to fading stars eg the hubby

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31 08 2012
telly bernardo

Very disappointing. I thought she’s be different.

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31 08 2012
telly bernardo

Correction: it should be “I thought she’d be different.”

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29 08 2012
Bituing marikit

Thanks for the follow up on epals and please make it a continuing feature till elections…that’s only in print but they also abound on tv….and pamilya pamilya,wala ng hiya hiya….wow they have discovered how to screw the Filipino people and dry up the coffers.

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29 08 2012
m

uy! walang makati. may favoritism. hahaha!

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29 08 2012
Bituing marikit

Tito sotto’s speech decrying himself a victim of cyber bullying misses the point.technically he/villacorta plagiarized,wag nang magpalusot,sa wanbol university Lang uubra ang ganyang reasoning.the right thing to do is apologize to the blog owner and hope she accepts.if you cannot be honest with small things I dread what you can be capable of.

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29 08 2012
NoToEpal

Posteng Yawa!!!
hahaha! FTW!

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29 08 2012
aiken

In fairness to trisha bonoan, matipid naman sya sa pic, 10 years na nya gamit yang grad pc nya

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30 08 2012
yangiwei

Like!

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30 08 2012
Anonymous

“The truth is, attention seekers are looking for validation. They want to know that they are worthy.”
~Tito Sotto

#imacyberbully

Like

30 08 2012
BAROK

d best question number 10!

Like

30 08 2012
icebernice

free mercury drug?! W-O-W! ano ba requirements? no planking/owling at i-limit ang pwet sa 14 inches lang kapag sasakay sa jip?! pwede pwede! haha

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30 08 2012
timow

Sagutin ko na lang with side comments, as usual:
1. C [P-Noy: NO PORK BARRELS FOR YOU! (Seinfeld reference)]
2. B [Libreng Mercury Drug, ah? Malulugi na ba si Mariano Que?]
3. A [Bureaucracy from a solon, *rolls eyes*, oh, please!]
4. B [Lord, sana patawarin si Sec. Joel, hindi niya alam ang ginagawa niya.]
5. C [Kung maliit ang pangalan ng alkalde, siguro, kakaunti lang ang takbo ng trak. Mwahaha!]
6. A [Ang alternative rice, approved by DOST and Department of Agriculture… NOT.]
7. C [In your FACE, no further explanation necessary.]
8. B [Uh, kailangan i-explain ko ulit?]
9. C [Corny motto, hindi crunchy ang solusyon.]
10. C [Please quit fooling and get back to work, ika nga, magiging kang commercial ng semento pagkatapos ng termino ninyo.]

* * * * * * * * * *

Send the epals to Mars and bury in the hole created by the Curiosity rover!
(Libertas can kill my comment, brrrrr!!!)

* * * * * * * * * *

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30 08 2012
Libertas

Sotto
no brain, no backbone, no intellectual property.
just a sad old man who likes to play with young boys on tv! weird.

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30 08 2012
abimopectore

I fervently wish or even hope that *Atty Leni* would run as Congresswoman or Governor in CamSur (where Naga is one of its major cities) so that those shady Villafuerte clan would be now easily eliminated; remember it was the old Villafuerte who keeps on blocking J. Robredo (fr. the lower Congress) from its confirmation. And his son, Elray is the one whos pursuing (& obviously promising something financially rewarding) to former matinee idol & now jobhunting Manila-born actor Aga Muhlach to run as Congressman in CamSur – imagine that?! Likewise w/ this Julio boy… his twit/s were stupidly clueless & w/ malice.

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30 08 2012
Anonymous

to be fair to cong. bonoan-david, she does have a lot of project in manila. i think these politicians just have to find other ways for people to know it is them working behind the scenes.

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30 08 2012
jeproks2002

these politicians do anything and everything just to be known and get voted. since they seem to be everywhere including wakes and they sponsor costs of caskets, they might as well put their faces and names on tombstones too.

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30 08 2012
yangiwei

Sorry, but what exactly does epal mean? Riding the bandwagon?

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30 08 2012
Anonymous

Kapal muks talaga!

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30 08 2012
yangiwei

loved the Belo part

Like

31 08 2012
my

di ko kinaya yung number 7, malala! o.O. at dahil gusto ko manalo ng happiness, I’ll pay more attention sa mga nakapaskil sa mga dinadaanan ko. I’m sure may epal din akong pede i-expose 😀

but in fairness, tinanggal na yung pangalan ng congressman ng Makati sa service vehicle ng nanay ko ha…

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31 08 2012
obert

sana mi part 2, part 3 and more pa sa EPAL QUIZ…

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31 08 2012
Libertas

Next it will be a poster and media blitz for bam aquino for 2013. Keep the brand going.

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31 08 2012
jphilipg

Toy Story, The Godfather, and Epal Quiz. Rare instances where sequels are way much better. Bravo Heckler!

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31 08 2012
art

10. B: Here lies… Councilor Vincent Belmonte
hahahaha, pati poste pinatulan.

Like

1 09 2012
Anonymous

In fairness kay Joel Villanueva, ‘di niya nilagay ang mukha n’ya sa tarp. Natural lang naman nandun ang pangalan niya as head ng TESDA.

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3 09 2012
mba (@marielliba)

Please keep these Epal Quizzes going to keep people informed. And anyway, love the humor, too. 🙂 I’m sure that there would be no problem finding new material and examples (sadly) for an ongoing series of Epal Quizzes. Para at least, kung ayaw ang mga politiko na sumunod sa batas, daanin na lang natin sa pagpapakita na alam natin na mali ang ginagawa nila (at na hindi tayo tatahimik na lang kahit na mali ang ginagawa nila).
Sabi nga ni Edmund Burke, “All that is necessary for evil to triumph in this
world is for good men to do nothing.”

FYI, Mayor Lim has ordered to have posters with his pictures removed (http://www.abs-cbnnews.com/nation/metro-manila/09/02/12/lim-orders-removal-banners-bearing-his-face). At least, kahit papaano, tumatalab, di ba?

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3 09 2012
Anonymous

You missed the point. Ano kinalaman ng TESDA kay Robredo? Kailangan ba magwaldas ng pera galing sa kaban ng bayan para sa tarpaulin na iyon?

Like

24 10 2012
joyce

AT….pwede naman sabihin in person sa pamilya ang pagpapaalam…hindi gagamit pa ng tarp…

Like

3 09 2012
Anonymous

Sa Binan at Sta. Rosa – Ma E-pal ang mga mayors at ang actor-turned-congressman na si Dan Fernandez. Biruin mo, sa pagpapagawa ng isang parke, may “DF” na markings sa bakod ng parke – aakalain mo na may ibinurol doon at initial niya iyon, hahaha! Meron pa, sa mga takip ng imburnal (how appropriate) doon sa Balibago, Binan, at kung saan-saan pa, diyan sa 1st district ng Laguna, halos lahat ng mga bagong takip may initial na “DF”.

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3 09 2012
Ako to walang kokontra

Naalala ko yang si Bonoan-david ang epal na pulitikong nagpanukala na singiling ng US$50 ang mga papaalis na OFW. Nung may clamor sa Facebook na nananawagan na wag siyan iboto, nagpass bigla ng email na binabawi niya yung batas.

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4 09 2012
Naga: What happens now? « Cerebral Insights

[…] The Epal Quiz II (professionalheckler.wordpress.com) […]

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9 09 2012
CJ Bonito

Reblogged this on Diary of a ShuperWoman.

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14 11 2012
aren_jimenez@yahoo.com

U did it again heckler!!!! I love it! You are getting all into their nervessssss….

Sent from my iPhone

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13 12 2012
bonjovax

yung background image sa #3 parang pang patay. hahaha

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