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DEAR SANTA/LOVE, GLORIA

22 12 2011


FORMER PRESIDENT Gloria Macapagal-Arroyo will be spending Christmas at the hospital. It’s the closest she could get to a ‘white Christmas.’

The court has reportedly allowed Mrs. Arroyo access to television. When she heard this, Leah Navarro offered to donate a Black and White TV.

The Arroyo family vowed to make it ‘Christmas as usual’ for the detained former president. There will be a salu-salo, a short program, and games. I heard that the Arroyo grandchildren really wanted to play ‘Trip to Jerusalem’ but the DOJ reminded them of an existing watch list order.

And believe it or not, those kids also wanted to do palo sebo. The former First Gentleman will provide the sebo.

Top 10 Christmas Wishes/Messages Sent by Mrs. Arroyo to Santa Claus
(List forwarded to The Professional Heckler by Santa Claus himself)

No. 10:
Dear Santa,
Gusto kong makilala sina Valerie Concepcion at Francine Prieto. I want to personally thank them. Wala lang.
Little Gloria

No. 9:
Dear Santa,
Hindi ako makagalaw. Limitado ang aking kilos. Sa sitwasyon kong ito, nawa’y manatiling faithful ang asawa ko. Ilayo mo siya sa tukso.
Little Gloria

No. 8:
Dear Santa,
I hope maging stronger ang relasyon ni Secretary De Lima sa boyfriend niya. Kung pwede nga Santa, mag-asawa na siya para mabawasan ang pagiging moody niya na ako lagi ang biktima. Please.
Little Gloria

No. 7:
Dear Santa,
Makarma sana ang mga kongresistang isa-isang tumalikod sa akin. Mga oportunista! May araw din sila.
Little Gloria

No. 6:
Dear Santa,
Uy, Mareng Juliet Gopez-Cervantes, ‘musta ka na? Miss ko na kayo. Visit naman kayo rito sa VMMC. Wala akong cell kaya ‘di kita ma-text eh!
Little Gloria

(Sumagot si Santa: “Dear Little Gloria, Sa North Pole mo na-send ang iyong letter sa iyong doktora. Malayo kami sa St. Luke’s. Tanga! – Santa)

No. 5:
Dear Santa,
Pahabain mo pa ang buhay ni Father Joaquin Bernas. His insights have been very helpful.
Little Gloria

No. 4:
Dear Santa,
Patnubayan mo ang kalusugan ni Atty. Ferdie Topacio. Sa mga pagkakataong ako ay sad, napapatawa ako ng kanyang mga banat. Ilayo mo sa disgrasya ang kanyang mga bayag.
Little Gloria

No. 3:
Dear Santa,
Bahala ka na kay Rene Corona. Mabait na tao naman ‘yon. Maaasahan sa lahat ng oras. Paki-assist na lang sa impeachment.
Little Gloria

No. 2:
Dear Santa,
Hindi ko gusto ang inaasta ng Judge Mupas na ‘yon. I smell conviction. Kunin mo na s’ya.
Little Gloria

And the No. 1 Christmas wish/message sent by Mrs. Arroyo to Santa Claus…
Dear Santa,
Big favor naman. Nagpabili ako ng kahun-kahong pakete ng sigarilyo. Ito lang ang alam kong paraan para makaganti ako. Pakidala naman sa bahay ng pangulo. Thanks.
Little Gloria

CPP Anniversary
Founded on December 26, 1968, the Communist Party of the Philippines is celebrating its anniversary on Monday. Congratulations to the CPP for sustaining a 43-year-losing streak.

Palparan on the Run
The hunt is on for retired Major General Jovito Palparan Jr. Immigration personnel have been alerted for a possible passenger whose face will be partly covered by a camouflage scarf.

MMFF
Kris Aquino says her film fest entry ‘Segunda Mano’ will keep moviegoers on the edge of their seats; feeling nervous because of uncertainty. Apparently, the film was inspired by the Aquino government.

I intend to watch Kris Aquino’s movie ‘Segunda Mano.’ I wanna get scared and laugh at the same time.
—————————————————————————————————————-
“Revenge is a confession of pain.”
~Latin Proverb

MERRY CHRISTMAS!

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16 responses

22 12 2011
mdompy@gmail.com

“And believe it or not, those kids also wanted to do palo sebo. The former First Gentleman will provide the sebo.”

–> this is so wrong! LOL! 😛

Like

22 12 2011
libertas

“I intend to watch Kris Aquino’s movie
‘Segunda Mano.’ I wanna get scared
and laugh at the same time.”

Scary – governor of tarlac 2013
Laughable – ” i could have been senate president”

I’ll save my money and wait for the reality show.

enjoy

Like

22 12 2011
eddibumangon

Tragic – i’ll give bong a run for his vp money

Like

23 12 2011
ovalgirl

tarlac governor? seriously? Sana kunin na sya ni Lord before 2013.

Like

22 12 2011
senior60

naalaala ko tuloy mister heckler, once upon a time my
topic ka na sinabi mo na may boyfriend si de lima, nag
comment ako siempre, ako pa hehe

sabi ko, alam kaya ng boyfriend ni lima na mag boyfriend-
girlfriend sila ni lima?

believe it or not, 3 times ko itong ni repost but it never saw
print, bakit kaya mister heckler? takot kayo kay de lima?

Like

22 12 2011
eddibumangon

De Lima’s bf was her driver…past tense dahil ngayon iba na dinadrive nya. 🙂

Like

24 12 2011
senior60

true ka eddi? kung ganuon, totoo pala ang, basta

driver, sweet lover, pero ganuon pa rin ang question,

alam kaya ni driver na mag-ano sila ni de lima?

Like

22 12 2011
senior60

” Tanga!-Santa ” marunong na pala magmura si santa

Like

22 12 2011
senior60

43 years na ang CCP, sa lagay na yan losing streak pa?

Like

23 12 2011
ovalgirl

CPP po senior.

Like

22 12 2011
assilem

CPP po..

Like

24 12 2011
senior60

ah ok ty

Like

22 12 2011
DEAR SANTA/LOVE, GLORIA « The Professional Heckler | Pnoy Talks

[…] Originally posted here: DEAR SANTA/LOVE, GLORIA « The Professional Heckler […]

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22 12 2011
eedyah

every time you include kris in your article, nakakawalang gana

Like

23 12 2011
ovalgirl

bakit, big fan ka ni tetay?

Like

24 12 2011
train horns for trucks

It can be insane to believe Kobe Bean Bryant and Vanessa Bryant are getting a breakup. Let’s hope the la lakers will still have the capacity to win this year.

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