ALMOST EXACTLY a year ago, I parodied a Gloria Gaynor song when then outgoing President Gloria Macapagal-Arroyo filed her certificate of candidacy for representative of Pampanga. Here’s Version 2 of that blog post.

For accompaniment, right click here before you start reading (or singing). Enjoy!

Congresswoman GMA:
First I was afraid
Now, I’m petrified
Kept thinking I could never live
without SC by my side
But then I spent so many nights
thinking I did nothing wrong
I think I’m strong
I know I can carry on

With painful back
and lack of space
I did feel bad to see you there
with all that joy upon your face
My lawyer’s one stupid lot
I should have fired, oh that’s easy
If I had known for just one second
he would bet his balls for me!

The People:
Go on now go walk out the door
just disappear now
you don’t have power anymore
weren’t you the one who cheated for Team Unity
you’re in big trouble
you think we’ll just let you flee?

Congresswoman GMA:
Oh no, not I
I will survive
oh as long as Titong’s there for me
I know I will stay alive
I’ve got all my life to live
I’ve got all my cash to give
and I’ll survive
I will survive
Hey hey

It took all the clout I had
not to fall apart
kept trying hard to fight
PNoy, De Lima, and Mupas
and I spent oh so many nights
praying hard just for myself
I’ll never cry
I will hold my head up high

Soon you’ll see me
somebody new
Won’t be that neck-braced little person
looking frail in front of you
and so I fight that goddamn panel
And just expect me to be free
‘coz my lawyers have been saying
the High Court’s gonna favor me

The People:
Go on now go walk out the door
just disappear now
’cause you’re not feared here anymore
weren’t you the one who called and said “Hello Garci!”
you then said sorry
but that lacked sincerity!

Congresswoman GMA:
Oh no, not I
I will survive
oh as long as I have friend Rene
I know I will stay alive
I’ve got all my life to live
I’ve got all my wealth to give
and I’ll survive
I will survive
“Power tends to isolate those who hold too much of it. Eventually, they lose touch with reality and fall.”
~Frank Herbert

Warning: This is not Congresswoman Arroyo’s mug shot.

You Have Spoken
Dapat bang pagbigyan ng media ang hiling ng kampo ni dating Pangulong Arroyo na huwag isapubliko ang mga mug shots nito?
-Yes. Konting respeto naman. Konti lang. 31.96%
-NO! Dapat, walang kinikilingan. Walang pinuprotektahan. Ilabas ‘yan! 62.89%
-Pag-iisipan ko muna. 5.15%

Have a productive and safe week!

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Author: professionalheckler

See About the Heckler

24 thoughts on “SHE WILL SURVIVE II”

  1. The SC/arroyo court could well junk everything on tuesday/wednesday, and if so the country will go to hell in a handcart.

    In resonse to question whether GMA would keep her seat and perks, belmonte said yes, adding-

    “He pointed out that former Zamboanga del
    Norte Representative Romeo Jalosjos was re-
    elected twice even if he was convicted in court
    for raping an 11- year old girl in 1996.” – inquirer 20 nov 2011
    As though this was ok and matter of fact!

    I was not aware of this.

    If the electorate vote for people who rape children all should go to hell.

    No wonder everyone turns a blind eye to child trafficking and 14 year olds in ktv bars – especially around well frequented bars by politicos, and the western world sees the country as a mix of housemaids, hookers, hustlers and scam artists.
    Where is the pride in raping children.

    Belmonte has just confirmed what the world thinks. Idiot.


    1. there you go again with your litany about our beloved
      philippines, eternally comparing it to other countries, now,
      again, tell us which country, even first world countries,
      including yours, where? france maybe? who is as white as
      a bond paper, again, we are just second rate copycats..

      by the way, you know it that our present big problem is
      cybersex, and you know who are the criminals? foreigners
      like you, luring and victimizing our poor women with your
      money, raping them, the children with their innocence,
      is there any more sins bigger than this?.


  2. Todays medical bulletin from the lawyers!
    Poison dwarf now has colitis, and ‘lost her sparkle of beauty’ – lambino – is that a medical condition!
    call dr? belo
    And the spine disorder is spreading and will become life threatening (i.e unless she can leave the country).
    Strange that the doctors are so silent.

    But she must be smiling now that the govt must pay the 50,000 pesos a day for the presidential suite at st lukes and the accompanying doctors bills.

    She continues to screw the country


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