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5M

27 10 2011

IT’S ALMOST NOVEMBER! It’s the season of bonuses! Have you received yours? The MILF just got theirs!

In case you missed my tweet this morning: The mystery behind Claudine Barretto’s missing bank deposit (P5M) has been solved. It was allegedly withdrawn by government peace panel chair Marvic Leonen and donated to the Moro Islamic Liberation Front!

Malacañang said the P5M given to the MILF was intended for the Bangsamoro Leadership and Management Institute (BLMI). The BLMI is where the MILF will train future Moro leaders who will fight the future government for a future substate.

Presidential spokesperson Edwin Lacierda says the government will ask the MILF to account for the amount it gave the rebel group last August. I’m sure it will be easy for the MILF to liquidate 5 milion pesos. It only took them minutes to liquidate 19 soldiers.

MILF vice chair for political affairs Ghadzali Jaafar insists the 5 million pesos “donated” by the government to the MILF is still intact. ‘k.

Libyan dictator Moammar Gadhafi and President Aquino now have something in common. They donated funds to the MILF rebels.

Gaddafi
Less than a week after his body was stored in a freezer, Libyan dictator Moammar Gadhafi was buried. Take that Ferdinand Marcos!

Colonel Moammar Gadhafi has been buried. But die-hard supporters couldn’t find his grave. Filipinos have a term for that: “Undas.”

Watch List
The Department of Justice has issued another watchlist order against former President Gloria Macapagal-Arroyo and former First Gentleman Jose Miguel Arroyo. The couple will not be allowed to leave the country sans the approval of the DOJ. Sources say the Arroyos are getting frustrated. They want some respect, consideration, and tolerance from the government. Hence, their plan to join the MILF.

State Visit
Vietnamese President Truong Tan Sang had a bilateral meeting with President Aquino in Malacañang Wednesday afternoon. Tan Sang is in the country for a three-day state visit. Now that explains why palace-based presidential speechwriter Mai Mislang is on a three-day leave of absence.

The President of Vietnam is in the country. Last night, he tweeted that the wine served by President Aquino didn’t suck and that “marami palang pogi dito.”

Clinton in Manila
US Secretary of State Hilary Rodham-Clinton will meet with President Aquino in Manila on November 15. This early, the President is being warned. Hillary hates cigars.

Pop Talk
The Philippines is the 12th most populous country in the world. Therefore, we are the 12th horniest people on earth. Congratulations!

According to the UN Population Fund, China has the biggest population at 1.3 billion, followed by India at 1.24 billion. In third place is Ramon Revilla Sr’s household.

Alcohol Poisoning
A British coroner ruled that Amy Winehouse drank herself to death. And Executive Secretary Paquito Ochoa was like, “Don’t worry. I know my limits.”

Anti- ‘Anti-Smoking Ban”
A Mandaluyong RTC judge has issued an injunction against the MMDA’s anti-smoking campaign. Critics say it was a victory for tobacco companies. Or as the judge would call it, “bonus!”

Sentenced
For illegally disbursing 21 million pesos in government funds, former ARMM Governor Zacaria Candao has been sentenced to 153 years in prison. If it’s any consolation, Candao will be locked up in a prison cell with a convict identified as Michael Scofield.

—————————————————————————————————
“A good leader is a person who takes a little more than his share of the blame and a little less than his share of the credit.”
~John C. Maxwell

Quotes of the Week
“I think ‘all-out justice’ are just words. The President is trying not the use ‘all-out war’ because it will definitely cause some furor among different sectors. But what does all-out justice really mean?”
~Sen. Francis Joseph Escudero

“The watchlist order which has the effect of a hold departure order is illegal. To me, the watchlist order that encroaches on the right of a person to travel is contrary to the Constitution.”
~Sen. Franklin Drilon on the watchlist order issued by the DOJ vs. CGMA et al.

Elsewhere
GMA News: MMDA sets up smoking areas on EDSA, Commonwealth

How big was the world when you were born? Find out here. This is fun and informative.

Phil. Daily Inquirer: Fast Facts: The World Population

You Have Spoken
The President has spoken. Ikaw, anong stand mo sa problema natin sa MILF?
-All-out war! All out justice! 64.47%
-Peace talks! All-out justice! 25%
-Thinking… 10.53%

Happy Holidays! Stay safe. Spread the love.

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I am on Twitter: @HecklerForever.

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27 responses

27 10 2011
gerrycho

papasagwa ng papasagwa ang nangyayari ah?
hindi ba nakikita ng gobyerno na pinagtatawanan sila ng MILF?!?

masama nyan baka maka-encourage pa yan bumuo ang iba pang armadong grupo na humingi ng kanya kanyang sh*t

Like

27 10 2011
Paul

Giving taxpayers’ money to a group who terrorized, robbed, bombed, maimed and killed the taxpayers is indeed incomprehensible. But i guess not even PNoy or anybody in his government comprehends his actions

Like

29 10 2011
senior60

noynoy is now in a unique situation wherein on one
hand, he may even be willing to kneel just to attain
peace, for his glory, on the other, will, by all means
send gloria to jail no matter if she is dying, for his glory..

now, who is the lesser evil, the murderers or the corrupt/
plunderer…

Like

2 11 2011
hikatalomato

in short, he ain’t got balls

Like

28 10 2011
raul

@gerrycho, please read the article of randy david in PDI 10/27/2011 issue, para naman kahit papano may maintidihan ka sa usapin ng moro rebelyon, bago ka magsalita. I am a christian leaving with the muslims here in mindanao…

Like

27 10 2011
barok94

I like the idea of prepaid government officials…no accomplishment, no pay!

Like

29 10 2011
senior60

barok, in 1k words, please expound…

Like

27 10 2011
kalokah

gumigimik si claudine. flop kasi yung teleserye nya.
kelangan daw mapagusapan.

sino ba yung showbiz reporter na nakasunod sa kanya habang nagwi-withdraw?

Like

28 10 2011
Khym D (@KhymaLey)

nelson canlas from GMA-7 chika minute… that was kinda awkward and here’s Claudine, very angry and trying to compose herself…

Like

28 10 2011
senior60

kalokah ka naman kalokah sa hakahaka mo,

bakit, sa tingin ba ni claudine mag top rate na

kanyang show dahil doon?

Like

28 10 2011
kalokah

not fr me. fr comments on showbiz sites. check her history. she has a new controversy every time she has a new show or movie.

anyway, tingnan natin after ilang months kung totoong hiwalay na sila.
pag hindi, then tama ang comments.

Like

30 10 2011
senior60

lahat naman ng mga posts natin dito ay galing sa
mga nababasa natin kalokah, hinimayhimay na natin
at we will stand by it na….

whatever is the outcome pagdating ng panahon, hindi
yun dahil sa gumigimik si claudine, in this situation ha…

Like

27 10 2011
5M « The Professional Heckler | Pnoy Talks

[…] Read the rest here: 5M « The Professional Heckler […]

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27 10 2011
libertas

Google hypoparathyroidism and not only is there a worldwide association but it also identifies the worlds experts and centres of excellence – US, UK, and hong kong.
Not surprisingly arroyo is visiting countries known more for its banks than its doctors and with no extradition treaties.

Like

27 10 2011
Lynda Jumilla

panalo! hi loi!

Like

27 10 2011
professionalheckler

hahaha Hi Madam Ombudsman!

Like

27 10 2011
siri

Happy Holidays! Stay safe. Spread the love.

Akala ko spread the legs… hehe

Like

28 10 2011
senior60

wrong ka mister heckler, the milf didn’t ‘just got’ theirs,

sa katunayan, sabi pa nga ni libertas na naipagbili na

raw ng mga armas na syang pumatay sa 19 soldiers…

Like

28 10 2011
senior60

ano ba talaga doj/de lima, kailangan ba talaga i terrorize

ang mga arroyo? siempre alam nila ang dapat nilang gawin,..

itong si de lima masyadong feeling, feeling powerful, nag

pa power-tripping palagi…

gusto mo magiging senador?

Like

28 10 2011
senior60

ito namang si drilon, ang tagaltagal na ng watchlist

na iyan, ngayon pa naka tsika, ano ba..

Like

28 10 2011
libertas

Lacierda said Deles and government peace panel
chair Marvic Leonen still have the trust and
confidence of President Aquino.

the problem is none of them have the trust and confidence of the AFP and the people.

about time we had more than one carefully massaged opinion poll in the country. with technology easy to do to get the real feelings and figures, rather than SWS just spending 10 mi.utes at the makati business club for a free lunch

Like

28 10 2011
senior60

if we are looking for a good leader based on the definition

of jc maxwell, will we ever find one?

Like

28 10 2011
libertas

The ligots have escaped and soon the arroyos.
Can de lima do nothing right, or do they prefer to have no court case which could implicate and embarrass current thieves, and then claim a victory in the media only.
Games children and politicians play.

Like

28 10 2011
Anonymous

Your heckling is so funny. But it hurts. Truth hurts. How can we continue discussing peace with people whose definition of peace is waging war? How can you deal with a group who refuses to recognize the sovereignty of the people or even call themselves Filipino? These are treasonous actions and we give them money still? Deles and Leonen are either naive or stupid? Either way, we, the sovereign Filipino people, have to suffer for their mistakes.

Like

29 10 2011
painuminmoko

lol.. if I have 5M in my bank account I will make this earth a better place lol.. joking…

Like

2 11 2011
hikatalomato

present!

Like

3 11 2011
anong.gusto.mong.inumin

Just make a better you.

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