THE GOVERNMENT will spend an additional 72 billion pesos this year for key programs like poverty alleviation & housing, and infrastructure projects to boost the economy. President Aquino calls the 72-billion peso budget a “stimulus package” – or as contractors would say, “Merry Christmas!”
President Aquino has approved the release of a 72-billion peso stimulus package. Of the total figure, some 5.5 billion pesos will be spent by the DPWH for roads, bridges, flood control, and Photoshop seminars.
Unfortunately, the police and the military will not benefit from the stimulus package. To augment its arsenal of weapons though, the President has referred them to Ronald Llamas.
President Aquino has unveiled the needed stimulus for the economy. His next target is to find the needed stimulus for his own package.
On Wednesday, a ‘candid’ President Aquino gamely answered questions from the members of the Foreign Correspondents Association of the Philippines or Focap. When asked about his love life, the President replied, “That is not my priority at this point in time.” To which ‘love life’ replied, “The feeling is mutual.”
President Aquino has spoken. He has rejected a hero’s burial for the late dictator Ferdinand Marcos. Consider that a dead issue.
President Aquino will not allow a hero’s burial for the late dictator Ferdinand Marcos. Aquino just reminded everyone that he’s the country’s president, not Jejomar Binay.
Rumors say when Imelda Marcos heard about Aquinos’ decision, she rushed to the Marcos mausoleum. In front of her husband’s body, she cried and waxed poetic.
True Marcos Loyalist Movement chairperson Cherry Cobarrubias said, “Marcos is the true icon of democracy for declaring martial law.” She also believes that Snooki Polizzi is the most beautiful woman alive.
Mar & Korina
DOTC Secretary Mar Roxas admitted that he and wife Korina Sanchez “are trying very hard” to have a baby. He refused to elaborate on his stimulus plan.
Before his appointment was finally confirmed Wednesday, DOTC Sec. Mar Roxas was asked by Sen. Panfilo Lacson, “Totoo bang nagdadalang-tao si Korina?” Mar was about to answer when Lacson yelled, “Sasagutin natin ‘yan sa pagbabalik ng ‘The Buzz!’”
Four men tried but failed to rob the Masuerte Rural Bank of Bacoor in Cavite Thursday afternoon. The suspects peacefully surrendered to the police after taking hostage the bank’s eight employees and depositors. Moral of the story: Huwag manloloob ng bangkong masuwerte. Mamalasin kayo.
During the hostage crisis, one of the suspects, Johnny Gonzales negotiated their surrender through dzRH’ Deo Macalma. When the hostage crisis was over, Gonzales was thankful and felt extremely lucky that they talked to Deo and not to Erwin Tulfo.
Piolo & KC
Piolo Pascual and KC Concepcion have allegedly called it quits. OMG! Did anyone see that coming! Totally unexpected.
“The trouble with a budget is that it’s hard to fill up one hole without digging another.”
Quote of the Week
“If you just do a little checking, you will see that there is no basis for such an allegation and I’m sorry, I’m also human. I feel kind of insulted when I’m asked to disprove a non-event. And I think any of us given the same situation would also feel that way, why do I have to prove something that did not happen.”
~President Aquino’s response to a journalist who asked if there’s truth to persistent rumors he was playing video games during the Manila hostage crisis last year
You Have Spoken
Sa kontrobersyang kinasangkutan ni Presidential Political Adviser Ronald Llamas:
-‘Wag nang palakihin. Parusahan kung nagkamali ang security aides. Move on. 41.51%
– Dapat siyang mag-resign. 50.94%
– Wala akong pakialam. 7.55%
Enjoy the rest of the week! Ingat!
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