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LINTANG

19 07 2011

“Hello! Kumusta kayong lahat?”
– The (only) words uttered by former Maguindanao elections supervisor Lintang Bedol in the press conference held Tuesday morning at the Commission on Elections

AFTER HIDING from law for more than four years, former Maguindanao election supervisor Lintang Bedol – Comelec officials claim, “surrendered voluntarily.” Or as one game show contestant would say, “Deal!”

Local Government Secretary Jesse Robredo admitted that he “facilitated” the surrender of Lintang Bedol. Take that Zaldy Ampatuan!

Ex-Maguindanao election supervisor Lintang Bedol finally surfaced Tuesday. Wearing a bulletproof vest, he attended the Comelec-sponsored “Batian Portion.”

“Hello! Kumusta kayong lahat!” Bedol greeted the media. And I was like, “Ano ka, si David Archuleta?”

Former election official Lintang Bedol has surfaced! He refused to talk to the press but his lawyer confirmed Bedol has learned to cook adobo, afritada, sinigang, embotido, and empanada with the help of Google while in hiding

Lawyer Lintang Bedol was a fugitive who ran away from the law. He’ll probably write a book in which he’d reveal, “kung saan ako nagtago.”

On Friday, Lintang Bedol will appear on ‘Umagang Kay Ganda’ to demonstrate his cooking skills with Anthony Taberna.

Now detained in Camp Crame, former Maguindanao election supervisor Lintang Bedol has begun serving his six-month prison sentence… or as Hubert Webb would say, “One week.”

Posthumous Declaration?
Sen. Francis Escudero said Fernando Poe Jr. could be posthumously declared winner of the 2004 presidential elections if it is proven that Gloria Macapagal-Arroyo rigged the results of the polls. But Escudero won’t say if Susan Roces could use the title, “former First Lady.”

Comelec Chairman Sixto Brillantes Jr. says the poll body can no longer undo the proclamation of President Gloria Macapagal Arroyo even if it is proven she manipulated the election results. Mike Arroyo can now heave a sigh of relief. He’s still the former First Gentleman!

Sara’s At Fault
A fact-finding committee formed by the DILG has found Davao City Mayor Sara Duterte guilty of “conduct unbecoming of a public official” for attacking a court sheriff last July 1. Meanwhile, a separate committee has also found Vice Mayor Rudy Duterte’s middle finger guilty of “gesture unbecoming of a body part” for offending people’s sensitivities.

The fact-finding committee formed by Interior and Local Government Secretary Jesse Robredo has found Davao City Mayor Sara Duterte guilty of “conduct unbecoming of a public official.” The committee recommends the filing of administrative charges against the mayor. It also recommends that Robredo avoid visiting Davao City ever.

Gecko News
The illegal trade of tukô or gecko in the Philippines via the Internet has been exposed, and authorities have warned against the sale of the reptile without government permit. In totally unrelated news, the Ombudsman has suspended Kalookan City Mayor Recom Echeverri for his failure to remit over P37 million in city employees’ contributions to the GSIS. At press time though, he continues to cling to his post.

Amanda Coling
Interviewed on live TV, controversial model Amanda Coling referred to herself as the “alleged victim.” See? Even she is doubting herself!

Initial reports say Amanda Coling is an applied physics graduate from UP. But the University of the Philippines quickly denied the report. It turned out that Coling was a graduate of another UP: University of Papansin.

Amanda Coling was interviewed on GMA 7’s ‘Showbiz Central’ last Sunday. Almost everyone agreed: it was a BAD decision. The only thing WORSE was Pia Guanio’s skills as interviewer.

————————————————————————————-
“It’s not the voting that’s democracy; it’s the counting.”
~Tom Stoppard, Jumpers

Elsewhere
GMA News: Boracay is 4th best island in the world

I’m hooked on “The Walking Dead.” Here’s a first look at Season 2.

GMA News: Amanda Coling’s official statement re: “Rape rumors”

Briefly Noted
From the people who brought us City Lite 88.3 and Joey@92.3 comes Mega Manila’s newest music hub: Radio High 105.9FM. Not for everyone.

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I am on Twitter: @HecklerForever.

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30 responses

19 07 2011
anon

At Amanda Coling- yeah! i hate her when she said “ako na nga ung alleged victim, ako pa ung naaargabyado”… alam nya kaya ibig sabihin ng “alleged”???

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20 07 2011
hikatalomato

we have an impersonator here

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21 07 2011
phreddox

wahahaha! ang taray mo anon! apir!!!

Like

19 07 2011
rojan88

hahaha. si bedol na daw magiging new endorser ng Nido. hehehe
ang kulit ng pic ni coling dito ah, parang bangang pa.hehehe..

nice one again idol. 🙂

http:/rojan88.wordpress.com

Like

20 07 2011
shirley

hahaha…mao ron! luoy-ya oy! basig batuha na sia ug durian kung moadto sia didto!

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20 07 2011
LINTANG « The Professional Heckler | Pnoy Talks

[…] LINTANG « The Professional Heckler This entry was posted in Gloria, Gloria Macapagal Arroyo and tagged fernando, francis-escudero, […]

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20 07 2011
assilem

I’m so excited to txt my tweeties to read ur blog.
kht hnd ko p sya tapos basahin..
Uber fanatic kc sila ni David ARchuleta..
Ako fan lang..
#AyLabYuNa

Like

20 07 2011
Matt

There is a saying in the West “you couldn’t have made it up if you tried”. I think the politics in the Philippines fits into that category, I could imagine submitting it as a story to Hollywood as a film and having it rejected as “unrealistic” and that these things could’t happen in real life. Yet here we are every week some of the strangest world events going on inside these isles!

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20 07 2011
jeproks2002

Bedol’s and the Ampatuan’s actions are understandable and completely in accordance with the Bishops’ teachings. These people did what they had to do even it meant dealing with the devil for their utmost intent was to use whatever financial gain received to help the poor particularly their poor relatives.

Like

20 07 2011
bostonceltics

Hindi ko ma-imagine kung ano nangyari sa Pinas kung si FPJ ang naging Pangulo lalo na noong panahon ng economic meltdown. Mabuting tao siguro si FPJ pero minsan hindi naman sapat ang pagiging mabuti para mapatakbo mo ng maayos ang isang organisasyon.

Tignan na lang si ERAP, kulang sa kaalaman, kaya nahuli.

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20 07 2011
clueless

Hindi lang si Erap, kahit yung current president na clueless din.

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20 07 2011
danny

@bostonceltics:

…would u still rather prefer GMA after having learned all these massive corruptions and widespread cheating?

…evidently, proscrastination plays a big part in filipino’s decision-making. ang pinoy masyadong maraming pero, baka, hindi kaya, ano, etc. etc.

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20 07 2011
hikatalomato

economic meltdown? me ganon teh?

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22 07 2011
mara

ang ekonomiyang natutunaw pababa

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21 07 2011
phreddox

at least he would have been the legal and undisputed President… good leader or not, that is the essence of our democratic way of government…

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21 07 2011
eddibumangon

yes! this is really important. so let’s investigate the 1992 presidential elections too. even if maid mirriam would have changed the capital of the philippines to mandaluyong, at least she would have been the legal and undisputed President…:-)

Like

22 07 2011
hikatalomato

dodoble kita ng mga printing business pagnakataon. instead kasi na isang poster lang ng mga failippine presidents ang ididikit sa mga classrooms, eh magiging dalawa na. isa para sa mga “bogus presidents” at isa para sa mga “should be the legitimate presidents” of the republic. lulz

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20 07 2011
rev22

another good article. sana gumawa si ping, bidol, at yung iba pang tumatago ng cook book. 🙂

Like

20 07 2011
amateur heckler

sige magbullet proof ka. ang mga bisaya may “piya-it must die”… ano nga ba yan sa tagalog? “Bintang Dedbol”?.

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20 07 2011
hikatalomato

hindi po tagalog si bedol. isa po siyang moklo.

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20 07 2011
timpaul

prof, yung joke ko lumabas sa column ni boo. sarap pala…

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20 07 2011
professionalheckler

great! i think he does print submissions. 🙂

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20 07 2011
amateur heckler

oops napasobra ata sa sarap si hayden at nakalimutan ang pangalan!

Like

20 07 2011
danny

…ang kakapal talaga ng mukha ng mga pulitikong ito e pare-pareho nman silang mga nanloloko at manloloko pa ng taong bayan.

…ang politics tlga daig pa ang showbiz. prang malaking reality show. captive audience ang mga mamamayang pinoy. sad thing is, we have to pay… the HUGE price.

Like

20 07 2011
senior60

oa naman yung nakasuot pa ng bullet proof vest,
sino naman kaya interesado sa kanyang buhay…

at ano naman gamit ng vest, pwede naman tirahin
sa, sa mukha kaya…

Like

22 07 2011
hikatalomato

actually ñor, sa sobrang kapal ng mukha ni bedol, walang ordinaryong bala ang tatalab diyan. kailangan mo pang ipahid muna sa lubot ng baboy ang bala para tumalab sa kanya.

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20 07 2011
senior60

4 years ago, 6 months imprisonment ang hatol,

4 years after, ganuon pa rin? wala man lang tubo?

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20 07 2011
danny

“Hello! Kumusta kayong lahat!” Bedol greeted the media. And I was like, “Ano ka, si David Archuleta?”

…hahahaha!!

Like

20 07 2011
shang

kelangan talaga magtago para matuto magluto e.. heheh..

Like

22 07 2011
Anonymous

hehe. natawa din ako sa…The only thing WORSE was Pia Guanio’s skills as interviewer….truelala!

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