The Vizconde Massacre Case
The NBI announced they found at least six new witnesses in the Vizconde massacre case. If the NBI was this eager in locating Panfilo Lacson last year, they would have found him six times.

According to the new witnesses, Hubert Webb was in the country when the Vizconde massacre took place. And in another breakthrough, the NBI claims the new witnesses are willing to testify that Hubert Webb was also in the country when Ninoy Aquino was assassinated.

Justice Secretary Leila De Lima says the new witnesses have no reason or motive to fabricate their respective statements. For security reasons, she identified them as alias Pitong, alias George, alias Rey, alias Mario, alias Jerry and alias Jack… collectively known as alias NBI.

The NBI’s new batch of witnesses includes an electrician, a haircutter, a security guard, a shabu dealer, and two guys who played basketball with Hubert. Welcome to the new season of Survivor!

The National Bureau of Investigation said an alias Black Maria, and not state witness Jessica Alfaro might have been present when the Vizconde massacre took place. I wouldn’t be surprised if the NBI declares the massacre a hoax.

Word of the Day
Dry humor – noun: See “President Aquino”
Example: “… pagbaba ko po sa puwesto sa 2016, sana po’y nakapag-asawa na, babangon naman kayo sa isang Pilipinas na mas maunlad.

Presidential spokesperson Edwin Lacierda admits, “the President’s humor is dry.” Among other things.

Reports say President Aquino was smitten with Filipino-Korean TV/radio host Grace Lee. The President believes Lee is his Seoul mate.

Vice President Jejomar Binay was quoted to have said that he didn’t want to compare himself with President Aquino saying, “we’re not comparing apple to apple.” Sige, let’s say apple to duhat. Puwede na ba ‘yon?

Novaliches Bishop Emeritus Teodoro Bacani says same sex union is “kadiri.” Bacani believes marriage is sacred and should only be between a man and a woman. If she refuses, harass her!

Korina and Mar
Interviewed by entertainment editor Ricky Lo, broadcast journalist Korina Sanchez has denied persistent rumors that her marriage with incoming DOTC Secretary Mar Roxas is on the rocks. Let’s be fair people. Let’s get the side of Mar.

Davao Flooding
As of 3pm, Wednesday, 15 people have been reported dead while 10 others are still missing after flashfloods hit Davao City. Residents are blaming the heavy rains and the flooding for those deaths; which is rather uncommon. Usually, they blame the Davao Death Squad.

Sky Flakes
I love Sky Flakes. I can also act. Hey Rafael Santos, can I star in your next film?

Asked why he hired theater actors for his movies, short film director Rafael Santos said, “You can feed them Sky Flakes three meals a day, and I pay them in cat food basically.” Santos directed the 2011 Cinemalaya entry, ‘Samarito.’ He’s now working on his next project called ‘Ingrato.’

Short film director Rafael Santos says he prefers theater actors over mainstream artists because, “You can feed them Sky Flakes three meals a day, and I pay them in cat food basically.” If only for his brand of humor, I’d say Santos has a huge chance of becoming president someday.

Vicki Belo and Hayden Kho are reportedly engaged. In fact, Kho just gave Vicki a ring. Take that LeBron James!

Reports say Hayden Kho proposed to Vicki Belo last year. There was this awkwardly tense moment though when Hayden popped the question. Vicki Belo got so excited, her cheeks moved.

And how did Hayden Kho propose? He waxed poetic!
“Injustice anywhere is a threat to justice everywhere.”
~Martin Luther King Jr.

Quotes of the Weak
“Kaya pag inimbita ho ako sa Cebu, hindi ho talaga mahirap maimbita rito. Pati ang bisita nating si Miss Grace Lee, akala ko tuloy Pinay e. Hindi nga pala, Korean. Pero pati yung mga Korean na dumarating talagang gwapa lahat. Kailangan yatang buhayin ang Malacanang [sa] Sugbu. Baka dito na rin tayo magkatuluyan.”
~President Aquino during the KEPCO-SPC coal power plant inauguration in Cebu hosted by Grace Lee

“Sorry na lang, napapangitan ako talaga. Para sa akin kadiri! Lalaki sa lalaki, babae sa babae, mag-aasawa.”
~ Bishop Teodoro Bacani

“Excuse me, sweet kami ha. And the weirdest rumors pa, fight daw kami nang fight, nag-alsa balutan daw ako, may third party daw. None of the above. Wishful thinking lang ‘yan ng mga inggitera at kalaban ni Mar sa pulitika.”
~Broadcaster Korina Sanchez

“Personally, I find that theater actors are better to work with because they don’t complain. You can feed them Sky Flakes three meals a day, and I pay them in cat food basically. And they’re never late, and they cry when you want them to cry. Other actors kasi you have to hit them first.”
~ Short film director Rafael Santos on why he hires theater actors

[Theater actor Joel Trinidad reacts.]

Briefly Noted
Reporters, news anchors, government officials, and even lawyers must be told: “(Double) JEOPARDY” is not pronounced as ‘jaw-par-dee.’ It’s ‘je-pәr-dē’ or ‘je-pә(r)-dē’ (Merriam-Webster).

You Have Spoken
Ayon sa dating pangulong Gloria Macapagal-Arroyo, ‘leaderless’ daw ang gobyerno. Your take:
-Agree! 49.57%
-Shut up! 44.87%
-Wala akong pakialam. 5.56%

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Author: professionalheckler

See About the Heckler

44 thoughts on ““KADIRI””

  1. nice.
    like ‘ waxed poetic’ very appropriate.

    meanwhile p-noy gets less presidential by the day. personally i dont think it is right to say in an official speech that you fancy someone – or is this his take on a chat up line. its demeaning to the person concerned who cant say what she thinks!
    the young girl he should be concerned about is the one raped inside malacanang by his psg. thats gone conveniently quiet.

    also at wake of fvr’s daughter to defend smoking and not link it to cancer is simply irresponsible.

    all part of his dry humour. he is the joke not his humour, or lack of it.


    1. It’s about time that Pnoy should come out of his closet and defend his kabaros. The UN has already recognized the rights of gay people, most states in the US, NY just recently, approved same sex unions. Why is the Pinas which is being led by one has no official stand regarding this?


      1. senior,

        how can you say that you recognize their rights and in the same breath deny them such rights. it’s a long shot for the church to allow such unions, they’re too jurassic for that, but the state should grant legality and protection to both partners who willingly enter such unions.


  2. “note: d2 n lng ako message, malungkot ang environment don s kabila pra wl PH community”

    @ lovelife: sayang din ung promo mileage. pang-dagdag points din bk maungusan c binay next survey;

    @kadiri: have you noticed bacani’s eyebrows when he said “kadiri”?

    @DOJ Sec: madam hindi na po ba kyo magsasawa sa kasa-sawsaw sa mga issues na wala nmang pinatutunguhan? hindi ko makuha ang logic ng premise na “ns pinas c webb during the visconde massacre”. what’s the point? everything happened is a lie? the SC concurred to the lies?

    can someone enlighten me please?


  3. wrong, rafael santos, very wrong :/

    nakaka-stress yung kaso ni hubert webb. at napakainefficient ng justice system naten 😦 ang tagal na tas ngayon niyo pa uli papatunayan na hindi talaga umalis sa bansa. tas deadline na today. kawawa naman si lauro 😦

    namiss ko magcomment dito heheh 🙂


    1. figure of speech, idiomatic expression, am not sure
      ano tawag doon, what i am sure of ay, kaya na mention
      ni rafael ang skyflakes at cat food ay dahil sa, theater
      people are always lamenting na, walang pera sa teatro…

      as simple as that

      humanga na sana ako kay rafael pero, nang mag sorry
      siya dahil na bully ng mga theater people who reacted as
      if they are uneducated, who didn’t understood the simple
      message that rafael was trying to convey, ay, binawi ko
      ang hanga ko..


  4. VIZCONDE/NBI vs. WEBB FAMILY = tama na! even if I didn’t followed the hearings and just a snippet of the news in 90s, but from what NBI and WEBB has made their point these past couple of days, I will now have my side with the WEBB family! The evidence – hard evidence – doesn’t lie! I don’t know with the other co-defendants since I never seen nor heard them giving press conferences or even some kind of interview, ie: Pinky Deleon’s son, only once in December I think @ Karen Davila’s Headstart program. I just wish though that those who are the REAL KILLERS will be caught and brought to justice and bring back Jessica Alfaro to the county and give her jail time for Perjury or false testimonies… that bitch shouldn’t have been given special treatment no less send to another country at the expense of the gov’t (then) for LYING!


  5. Bishop Bacani saying “kadiri” to same-sex unions? Isn’t this the bishop who allegedly had an affair with his secretary at the Novaliches parish? When confronted about it, he came out in media with sunken cheeks and red, watery eyes. And I thought they are supposed to be celibate? Clarification: the secretary is female. The verb “came out” stands as it is. And yes, the good bishop has eyebrows that arch all the way to Wichita. Hello, Dorothy.


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