THE GOOD WIVES (?)


Mrs. Ligot
A very emotional Erlinda Yambao-Ligot showed up at the Senate hearing Thursday. Apparently, nobody told her she was there for a hearing, not for a shooting.

The wife of embattled Lt. Gen. Jacinto Ligot, Erlinda Yambao-Ligot, and her brother, Edgardo Yambao showed up at the Senate Blue Ribbon Committee hearing last Thursday. Mr. Yambao opened with a prepared statement while Mrs. Ligot opened with a prepared blood pressure.

Senators failed to grill Mrs. Erlinda Yambao-Ligot when she showed up Thursday at the Senate. The wife of former military comptroller Jacinto Ligot broke into tears even before senators could throw questions at her. According to the Senate physician, Mrs. Ligot registered at least 10 BP levels during her brief appearance, and her husband wasn’t aware of it.

Congressmen were supposed to invite the wife of former military comptroller Jacinto Ligot to a separate hearing next week. But the solons had an apparent change of mind when Mrs. Ligot threatened to buy the House of Representatives.


Korina vs. Binay
The camp of Vice President Jejomar Binay has filed a complaint before the KBP against news anchor Korina Sanchez for allegedly “omitting” his name at least thrice in her spiels on TV Patrol. Sought for comment on Binay’s complaint, Korina said, “Sino ‘yon?”

This just in: An anonymous source has intercepted private messages purportedly sent to each other by the newscaster and the vice president. [We’re still verifying the authenticity of the Twitter accounts). Here are excerpts from the heated and revealing exchange.

@BinayForever: sumusobra ka na iha.
@May_K: excuse me, do i know you?

@BinayForever: huwag kang magkunwaring ‘di mo ako kakilala!
@May_K: huwag kang magkunwaring friends tayo.
@BinayForever: were we not?
@May_K: never.
@BinayForever: owws? four letters: E-R-A-P.
@May_K: you lost me there. anong kinalaman ni erap sa identity mo? hindi nga kita kilala eh.

@BinayForever: huwag na tayong magpaka-plastic. we both supported the deposed president noong kasagsagan ng mga rally against him.
@May_K: that is absurd, preposterous, and ridiculous!
@BinayForever: just like you?
@May_K: anong problema mo, maliban sa kulay mo?
@BinayForever: namemersonal ka na naman eh.
@May_K: everything is personal. ‘yong makati city hall, inangkin mo na. ‘di ba mas namemersonal ka?
@BinayForever: i was elected by the people.
@May_K: you bought them. they had no choice.
@BinayForever: huwag mong idamay ang constituents ko sa pagiging bitter mo.
@May_K: bitter? ha-ha-ha! sinong bitter? ako? ha-ha-ha!
@BinayForever: oo, ikaw! halakhak mo pa lang, amoy ampalaya na. ilang Charantia ba ang nilunok mo kagabi?
@May_K: hindi ako pumapatol sa corrupt! t#2%$7^-i*@ mo!
@BinayForever: o, nagmumura ka na. relax!

@May_K: i can’t believe you won!
@BinayForever: ako rin. ha-ha-ha

@May_K: ano ba talagang gusto mo? gulo?
@BinayForever: anong palagay mo sa akin, ikaw?

@May_K: bakit? sino bang nagreklamo sa kbp? pati programa ko, idinadamay mo pa!
@BinayForever: aling programa? ‘yong “inalis” kay karen davila?
@May_K: hindi ko gusto ang tono ng pananalita mo.
@BinayForever: hindi ko gusto ang pag-aastang-reyna mo!

@May_K: ‘wag kang makialam sa pamamalakad ng bagong news and current affairs management!
@BinayForever: you first! este, sure!

@May_K: wala ka na sa lugar. kung gusto mong maglabasan ng baho, hindi kita uurungan. wala akong itinatago.
@BinayForever: ah, ganun!!!? puwes! ako meron! maghanap ka na lang ng ibang kaaway.
@May_K: ha-ha-ha duwag, walang bayag!
@BinayForever: ha-ha-ha! bakit? ‘yong asawa mo ba meron?
@May_K: huwag mong idamay si mar. tahimik na tao ‘yon.
@BinayForever: kahit naman siguro ako ang asawa mo, tatahimik din ako!

@May_K: kung makapagsalita ka, parang ang linis-linis mo ah! parang ‘di ka nagkaroon ng kabit!
@BinayForever: wow. nagsalita ang madrasta! just so you know, alam ni dr. elenita binay ang pangangaliwa ko!
@May_K: eh ang pandarambong na ikinaso sa ‘yo, alam din niya?
@BinayForever: tanga! pareho kaming kinasuhan ng plunder! ayusin mo nga ‘yang research mo!

@May_K: ‘wag mo ‘kong diktahan kung ayaw mong masaktan!
@BinayForever: hindi ako katulong, ‘wong mo kong bantaan!
@May_K: ang kapal ng mukha mo! dismissed na ‘yong kasong ‘yan!
@BinayForever: wala akong sinabing kaso… nagi-guilty ka na naman!

@May_K: by the way, ilang taon na nga ba ang pamilya n’yo sa city hall ng makati?
@BinayForever: beinte singko, bakit?
@May_K: ay, may tawag jan!
@BinayForever: lingkod-bayan?
@May_K: reptilian!
@BinayForever: ano ‘yon?
@May_K: tukô! gecko! bobo!
@BinayForever: kung maka-bobo ka naman, baka nakakalimutan mo, i am the vice president of the land.

@May_K: humahaba na ang usapang ‘to. paano natin ito wawakasan!?
@BinayForever: galit ka ba sa ‘kin?
@May_K: ako? galit? Hindi ah! love na love nga kita eh. dahil nga sa ‘yo hindi ako naging second lady di ba? dahil rin sa ‘yo, natengga nang isang taon si mar, right? at dahil sa ‘yo, katakut-takot na panlalait at kahihiyan ang tiniis ko nang matalo ang mister ko, alam mo ba ‘yon? ako? galit?? %#24^6* mo!
@BinayForever: hahaha may funny bone ka rin pala. ‘yong bone ba ni mar, funny din?

@May_K: hindi ka nakakatawa! tapusin na natin ‘to!
@BinayForever: paano nga?
@May_K: madali lang! bawiin mo ang complaint na isinampa mo laban sa akin sa KBP!
@BinayForever: oo ba! pero sa isang kondisyon…
@May_K: what?
@BinayForever: sumumpa kang magpapakabait ka na mula ngayon.
@May_K: ganun? sige, ituloy mo na lang ang complaint mo.

-End of conversation.-
——————————–
“The weak can never forgive. Forgiveness is the attribute of the strong.”
~Mahatma Gandhi

Survey Says
Sa balitaktakan ng mga anak ng dalawang dating pangulo ng bansa, kanino ka kampi?
– Team Bongbong Marcos 24.32%
– Team Noynoy Aquino 29.15%
– Wala! 46.54%

Elsewhere
Newsbreak: VP Binay’s rumor mill

Kamukha mo ba siya? The most typical face is on earth is… CLICK HERE.

Personal
“What am I gonna do
When the best part of me was always you
And what am I suppose to say
When I’m all choked up and you’re okay”

That’s from the hit song ‘Breakeven’ (a personal favorite) by the Irish band “The Script.” The trio will be performing live at the Araneta Coliseum on April 16. Tickets are now available at all Ticketnet outlets. For ticket information and reservations, please log on to http://www.ticketnet.com.ph or call Ticketnet at 911-5555. For sponsorship and preferred seating inquiries, please call 0916.688.8324 and 0921.207.2121.

Have a safe week ahead!

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Author: professionalheckler

See About the Heckler

45 thoughts on “THE GOOD WIVES (?)”

  1. mrs. ligot tand her brother were obviously prepped for the senate show. best actress goes to mrs. ligot and best supporting actor to mr. yambao.
    if the senators have the evidence, file the case in court already!!! next thing we know, yambao will have bp 10x his sister’s bp that day of the hearing and mrs. ligot will be declared insane. and they will come out with medical findings that she bought the properties during her lucid interval!!!!

    Like

  2. i somehow feared that ABS-CBN is becoming less transparent & less objective when former head, Ms. Maria Ressa, left them..tsk tsk.

    ewan ko ba, napaka-baseless talaga yung pagreplace kila Karen Davila, Julius Babao with Korina & Kabayan..mas gusto ko sila Karen & Julius!!

    palakasan system talaga..kawawa naman ang Pilipinas, kahit saang lugar lagi na lang may “pulituka,” seriously, can Filipinos all move ahead with our lives without corruption, using connections & power etc? nakakatakot naman ang future natin..

    Like

  3. napasubo kasi sya sa pagpapakasal kay mar roxas. akala nya kasi magiging first lady sya kaso di nangyari. ang masakit, di rin sya naging second lady.

    anyway, di naman sya lady-like kung umasta kaya wa-pakels na lang tayo. pero ang dinig ko, si mar daw ang feeling first lady ni noynoy.

    Like

  4. @May_K: i can’t believe you won! ; @BinayForever: ako rin. ha-ha-ha

    nga! binay himself admitted early that he too was incredulous! nga naman, his win was like a tiny bullet sneaking from behind; never expected; never imagined. this is what you could have called “never rest in peace, mar!”

    Like

  5. Korina: Libra (balance) – Ang specie na ito ay nag-iisang babae sa limang magkakapatid at ipinanganak sa Hongkong noong panahon na ang kanyang ama ay ang GM ng Ambassador Hotel. Napag-alaman din na ang babae na ito ay walang habas at preno sa pagmumura! Tignan mo nga naman ano.
    – Kakasuhan ka ng isang maitim na lalake dahil hindi mo binanggit ang pangalan nya sa report mo. Humanda ka. Wag ka muna pupunta sa Makati kung ayaw mong masaktan at hulihin ng MAPSA.

    VP Binay: Scorpio (Pandinus imperator, Centruroides sculpturatus, Androctonus crassicauda, maitimus malupetkumapitis) Ang specie na ito, sampu ng descendants nya ay billion years na! oo, billion years na sa trono ng Makati (malamang hanggang ngayon). Ang itsura ng specie na ito ay… maitim. period.
    – Wag makipag-away sa babaeng mahilig mag-mura, makakatikim ka lang ng masasakit na salita at baka hindi mo kayanin. Mag badminton ka na lang. Alam ko magaling ka dun (asa).

    Lucky enemies: Libra-Scorpio (last week lang nag start)
    Lucky colors: Black
    Lucky cake: Black Forrest
    Lucky numbers: 8-21(ATOM)

    Lagi natin tatandaan, hindi natin hawak ang mga bituin. Gabay lamang sila. Mayroon tayong free will, weather weather lang. =)

    (This comment is brought to you by the strong addiction and contagious effect of Professional Heckler) =)

    Like

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