COMPROMISE


CPP Turns 42
The Communist Party of the Philippines marks its 42nd year today, December 26. To celebrate its anniversary, CPP founding chair Jose Maria Sison will blow 42 candles while the CPP’s armed wing, the New People’s Army will blow up 42 cell sites.

Batch ‘71
The more prominent members of the Philippine Military Academy Batch ’71 reportedly enjoyed their Christmas shopping last week. Sen. Gringo Honasan bought jewelry for his wife; Senator Panfilo Lacson bought toys for his grandson, and ex-General Carlos Garcia bought temporary liberty for himself.

Ex-General Carlos Garcia who is facing plunder charges is out on bail! Rumors say the Sandiganbayan granted him liberty because they believed his alibi that he was in the United States when the crime took place and that he didn’t personally know Jessica Alfaro.


Cabinet Revamp
Last Friday, Presidential Communications Strategy Secretary Ricky Carandang confirmed that President Benigno Aquino would revamp his Cabinet next year. Quoting the President, Carandang said three cabinet officials would be affected by the reshuffle. He did not reveal their names although one thing’s for sure, those guys have no interest whatsoever in guns or target shooting. #sorrynalang

BIR’s Wrong List
Earlier this month, the Bureau of Internal Revenue released an erroneous list of the Top Individual Taxpayers for 2009. BIR Commissioner Kim Henares was quick to deny that the list was made by Executive Secretary Jojo Ochoa.

Len Lopez
Last December 16 President Aquino reportedly brought along his latest date, stockbroker Maria Elena “Len” Lopez to a sit down dinner with Cabinet officials and their spouses. Two words: (click here).

Annoying
For the second straight year, “whatever” was voted the most annoying word or phrase by Americans according to The Marist Poll. Meanwhile, in the Philippines, for the third straight year, voted the most annoying was Kris Aquino.


Pacman On Top
CNN’s Sports Illustrated has chosen Manny Pacquiao and his 2010 bouts as the year’s biggest boxing story. In close second was the Balay vs. Samar fight.

Solon Loses Cool
Alliance of Volunteer Educators (AVE) party list Rep. Eulogio Magsaysay reportedly berated a PAL ground attendant when he and his sons could not be seated together in the business class section of a PAL flight to Los Angeles recently. When told that all seats were taken, Magsaysay allegedly told the attendant “Shut up you bitch! You menopausal bitch. Ipapasisante kita.” Apparently, this educator was a terror teacher.

An incensed AVE party list Rep. Eulogio Magsaysay reportedly told a ground attendant, “Shut up bitch! You menopausal bitch!” Dahil d’yaaan, may nagtxxxxxxt! “Dear Congressman, saan ka ba nagpunta? Hinahanap ka na ng iyong amo. Bumalik ka na raw sa iyong kural.”

Flight Attendants Win
Favoring the Flight Attendants’ and Stewards’ Association of the Philippines in their dispute against Philippine Airlines, the Department of Labor and Employment has increased the mandatory retirement age of all flight attendants to 60 years old. The decision was slammed by PAL… and AVE party list Rep. Eulogio Magsaysay.

Crotch Me if You Can
Airport authorities nabbed a 38-year-old passenger headed for Cotabato City Airport on Christmas day after a packet of suspected shabu, or methamphetamine hydrochloride, was found in his underwear. Airport cops were definite about the substance saying, “Kapag shabu kasi, ‘di ka makakatulog. ‘Yong kuwan niya gising na gising!”
———————————————-
“Once you consent to some concession, you can never cancel it and put things back the way they are.”
~ Howard Hughes

Survey Says
Sa isyu ng errors sa new Philippine peso bills, your take:
– Importanteng maitama ang mali. Maliit man ang error, error pa rin. 49.76%
– Sus! Masyadong pinapalaki ang isyu. Lahat na lang pinansin. 40.67%
– Wala akong pakialam. 9.57%

Elsewhere
Palace releases list of holidays for 2011

CNN Sports Illustrated: Top Boxing Stories: Pacquiao is No. 1

CNN Sports Illustrated: Azkals made it on the list of the Top 10 Football Stories

Personal
The Los Angeles Lakers lost to the Miami Heat in today’s Christmas battle. Sa mga fans ni LeBron at ng Miami Heat, heto ang sa inyo: [Click here.]

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Author: professionalheckler

See About the Heckler

42 thoughts on “COMPROMISE”

  1. kudos to the CPP for being one of the longest running communist themed organizations in the world, and the cold war has been over for 20 years and so..hahaha… This is somehow a vindication or an insult to Francis Fukuyama’s End of History

    Lord,kelan ba matatapos ang pilit na pagudyok sa
    taong bayan na may syota si PNOY, too much showbiz, just go out of the closet and do your job…

    merry xmas sir PH..

    Like

  2. 2011 predictions

    p-noy will reach number 25 fantasy girlfriend, open 50 burger joints and have a hair transplant.

    kris aquino will endorse another 25 products which she doesnt use, if the price is right.

    vicki belo will od on surgery and become the bride of frankenstein

    boy abunda will explode as his ego gets too big for his head

    puno will go back to arms dealing

    ricky calamitydung will confirm again and again that newsreaders do not make politicians

    de castro will confirm that politicians do not make newsreaders or politicians

    ochoa will be more discreet where his takes his girlfriends

    singson will be seen sniffing white line road markings

    the philippines will be rebranded ad ‘ the basket case of asia’

    tv programmes will be replaced by adverts

    pacman will try to learn to speak english

    ph will get another award

    happy new year

    Like

  3. To me, the Most irritating word is “you know” but in tagalog. It is often spoken by showbiz personalities when interviewed. I don’t understand why when they are asked, they end their statements with “DI BA?”.
    To the Diba Queens Vice Ganda, Kris Aquino et al., eto sagot ko….EWAN! (read: WHATEVER!!!!)

    Like

    1. LeBron did beat the Lakers last Christmas 2009. His team got clobbered by the Celts where he ‘gave up’ on Game 5 of the ECF.
      He joined the Heat so he can have two players to bail his sorry as* when he ‘gives up’ again.
      Heat beating Lakers on Christmas Day means nothing.Just one to the W column,that’s all.

      Like

  4. I am quoting from a blog which is essentially true and until now hasn’t been investigated:

    MEDIA, backed and financed by the political elite – the real political kingmaker. Case scenario points to Erap, he didn’t need the media for publicity, he didn’t need the surveys to get a historic landslide victory in our recent presidential elections. But, it took the media to expose his misdemeanor and project him as… the dolt President, and deposed him.

    MEDIA, again backed and financed by the political elite highly responsible for projecting Noynoy as “Pag-asa ng Bayan”. Until when can they hide the truth that he is a dolt buffoon PCOS President? Now, what do we have? Your anwer is as good as mine. It is pretty apparent that he is something NOT even worthy of a legislative function.

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    1. Senior, ung cno b talaga ang nanalo? There was a source who said that B…. paid 3B (?) to PCOS officials to maneuver the results of the election and when asked who he wanted to be prez, he chose Noy2? Election in the Philippines is still pera pera lang. Witnesses were liquidated, drug money were used..etc..etc…
      Media were made to shut up or be shot… that is also why all news about this admin cover only the mababaw news about noy2, the never ending gimmicks kris a. make and of course the all-time saviour of the admin whenever they are in trouble: the SWS and Pulse Asia surveys.
      All media outfits are under this admin so there is no use for any grievances to be heard. Will just have to wait and see til this admin self- destruct and the poor people suffer more…
      Ikaw, Senior, what is ur stand?

      Like

    2. sorry, senior60, di pinost ni PH reply ko sayo yesterday..better luck next time.
      PCOS Presidency? Haven’t u heard about that?
      As what was said, media was made to shut up or be shot…kaya manigas na lang tayo…this is Martial Law Aquino Style..to manipulate media, to feed people of cheap gimmicks of his family, to publish surveys whenever his admin is on the brick of falling down, to castigate GMA to cover up his mistakes..etc..will just have to wait and see this admin self-destruct and see poor people suffer more..

      Like

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