NEWS/CASH


STARTING MONDAY, November 8, a former vice president, a former congressman, and a former senator’s wife will anchor ‘TV Patrol.’ Apparently, there was ‘politics’ in the drastic change.

TV5 is unfazed by the changes on ‘TV Patrol.’ On ‘Willing Willie,’ it will field an ex-future First Lady.

Valenzuela City Councilor Shalani Soledad said she was persuaded to accept the co-hosting offer of TV5 because she’ll be doing “public service.” When NBN4 executives heard this, they said, “Sayang! Had we known, inoffer sana namin sa kanya ang ‘Damayan!’”

Shalani Soledad has joined TV5 as co-host of Willie Revillame’s game show. This confirms her break up with the president.

In an interview, Willie Revillame said Shalani Soledad reminded him of the late Princess Diana. Shalani returned the compliment by telling Willie he reminded her of Princess Punzalan.

Radical changes are being implemented by ‘TV Patrol’ and ‘Willing Willie.’ Meanwhile, GMA 7 is monitoring both stations, beinte-kwatro oras.

‘TV Patrol’ has two new anchors; ‘Willing Willie’ has a new co-host… and ’24Oras’ has a new plug.

Meanwhile…
Sources say Karen Davila has yet to decide on her next move after being annihilated from ‘TV Patrol.’ Karen dismissed rumors she’s joining ‘Pilipinas, Win na Win.’

To give way to Julius Babao, Henry Omaga Diaz was removed from the late-night newscast ‘Bandila.’ He has since been given a ‘morning’ assignment.

Ces Drilon, the significant other of a Presidential Communications Group secretary will remain on ‘Bandila.’ This info was leaked to the press even before an official announcement was made.

The popular children’s show ‘Batibot’ is also making a TV comeback via TV5. Remember Big Bird on ‘Sesame Street?’ Rumors say ‘Batibot’ will have a similar female character. To give you an idea of how she would look like, right click here.

Light Bites
Elizabeth Barrett Browning:
“How do I love thee? Let me count the ways.”

President Aquino to Mar Roxas:
“How do I love thee? Let me count the null votes.”

President Aquino to Interior Undersecretary Rico E. Puno:
“How do I love thee? Let me count the guns.”

Vice President Jejomar Binay to “brod:”
“How do I love thee? Let me count the defense lawyers.”

Supreme Court to UP Law:
“How do I love thee? Let me copy some ways.”

Mai Mislang to Vietnam:
“How do I love thee? Let me count the pogi.”

Gabby Lopez to Noli De Castro:
“How do I love thee? Let me count the cash.”

Congressman Kapalmuks to pork barrel:
“How do I loot thee? Let me count the ways.”

CBCP to LBTG Rights advocates:
“How do I loathe thee? Let me count the gays.”

Exec. Secretary Paquito ‘Jojo’ Ochoa to Vina Morales:
“How do I love thee? Let me drink to that!”

ABS-CBN to Willie Revillame:
“How do I loathe thee? Let me count the suits.”

First Philippine Industrial Corp. (FPIC) to West Tower Condominium residents:
“How do I ‘leak’ thee? Let me count the pipes.”

Karen Davila to ABS-CBN:
“How do I leave thee? Let me count the offers.”

Hayden Kho to Vicki Belo:
“How do I love thee? Let me count the surgeries.”

Councilor Shalani Soledad to President Aquino:
“How do I spite thee? Let me count on Willie.”
——————————————
“When television is good, nothing is better. When it’s bad, nothing is worse.”
~Newton N. Minow

Survey Says
Sinibak ka sa TV Patrol, ano ang gagawin mo kung ikaw si Karen Davila?
– Wala lang. Deadma. Tanggapin ang Bandila. 22.65%
– Masakit. Baka sundan ko ang aking mister sa TV5. 51.22%
– Mag-iisip muna ako. Relax lang. 26.13%

We have a new survey. Please vote now.

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Author: professionalheckler

See About the Heckler

100 thoughts on “NEWS/CASH”

  1. equating a tv game show (that “sucks” especially its main host) to public service is something that is beyond my comprehension. isn’t being councilor enough? sobra sobra na ba ang na-serbisyo nya sa mga constitutuents ng valenzuela kaya kelangan nya rin ipamahagi ang powers nya for public service to the 8% audience share ng TV5 sa show na ‘to?

    never expected shalani, with all her reservedness and exuding simple beauty can stoop this low.

    she’s a disappointment. opinion ko lang.

    makapag farmville na lang nga at retired na ako sa mafia wars. 🙂

    Like

    1. feel ko rin yan, on second thought! biruin mo, of all people in this part of the world. siya pa?! and of all “public service” fares, in disguise, yun pa?! t’was unthinkable. but then, naisip na nila! it really is the top of all mismatched! unless one is transformed… sino kaya sa kanila. he he he.

      Like

      1. she can enjoy, discover all what needs to be discovered in life, for all i care. i have nothing against her. it is the show she’s in i am not comfortable with. ewan ko ba.

        kalaking kababalaghan kasi that the show is teeming with almost-nude gyrating dancers plus this walang ka modo modo na host exuding all the kayabangan kahit sa tono ng pananalita nya and then here she enters, nag iisang disenteng mukha sa gitna ng basura.

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      1. eh? who used who?
        in my x years of existence, i never had a major major memory who shalani is. noynoy, of course, since the days of ninoy’s assassination, is aware na ang karamihan sino sya. but shalani, although i have nothing against her, is zino bah?

        i voted for noynoy not because he used somebody as his front or whatever. i voted for him because of the trust i have for him.

        so who used who, again?

        Like

      2. “i voted for him because of the trust i have for him.”

        and what was the basis of your trust IN him? his non-performance in the 9 years he served as congressman and 3 years as senator? his bumbling on the job since day one? his choosing classmates and kabarkada inc over integtrity and competence? etc, etc?

        pray please tell us- what has he accomplished to earn your trust?

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  2. Aksyon will start earlier at 5:45pm…. Who cares? Puro naman mali-mali doon, technically and otherwise. hahahahaha…

    Mas inaabangan ko ang mas socially-relevant na pagbabalik ng Biyaheng Totoo sa 24 Oras. 😀

    Whatever happened to the notebook sa unang pasada ng Biyaheng Totoo? Naibigay na ba kay Noynoy?

    Like

      1. narehistro naman kaya sa utak? for all we know, baka kung saan lang naipatong yung notebook. he he. cargo ngayon ng 24 oras to follow it up! parang pumipila sa rasyon; kailangan i-check kung yung coupon mo, naka-file maayos at di natatabunan ng iba o di nalilipad ng hangin. c’mon mga kapusong totoo, sundan kung maaaksiyunan. aba’y pinaghirapan ninyong akyatin ang mga malalayong bundok at malalawak na dagat ng kahirapan sa Pinas mailatag lang todo larga kay PPnoy, huh! aber!!!

        Like

  3. Since when did co-hosting the most obnoxious host in a trashy show become public service? Choosing Willie at this time speaks volumes about her…we used to admire her low-key and simple ways until we watched her mom’s interview.it started to reveal a different facet of her personality.sayang sya…

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    1. bkit sayang? sayang bang kumita ng pera sa pagiging host? ano ang mapala mo sa pagiging low-key at simple? WALA!!! tapakan ka lang ng mga kapatid ni PNoy na puro pangit ang ugali…sabagay pangit din ang mga mukha ng mga kapatid ni PNoy!!!

      kung meron man na “different facet of her presonality” si Shalani…avah, congratulations to Shalani…Normal na Tao Lang Siya!!!

      Like

    2. At hindi siya sayang noong nagpapagamit lang siya kay Pnoy? Noong nagpapaapi lang siya sa evil sister? Noong nabuburo siya dahil hotdog ang hanap ni Pnoy?

      I think after all that’s done to her, she has nothing to lose but everything to gain from hereon. It’s payback time!

      Like

    3. i used to respect her and then had sympathy but i think she has lost all credibility and like all narcissistic politicians want the limelight and the easy money.
      she was so busy as councillor she had no time to see pnoy.
      suddenly she has a spare 10 hours a day for tv and to hell with her constituents who voted for her and pay her
      a warped sense of public service
      and maybe not ” butter wouldnt melt in my mouth” girl she likes to portray
      politics and showbiz is all too incestuous and those imvolved are not good at either. simply family connections.
      and good for business, girls,and drugs
      they wouldnt last 1 week in a real job but as they know no reputable company would employ them

      Like

      1. ano kamo si shalani walang tym kay PNoy? lola, si PNoy ang walang tym kay Shalani dhil busy sya kay Rico Puno at Mar Roxas…eh noong umuwi nga si PNoy galing U.S.A. eh wala nga siyang pasalubong kay Shalani, khit maliit na hotdog…

        ska magkano lang ang sweldo ng councilor at marami pa ang humingi ng tulong…avah yung kikitain nya sa show ni Wilie malaking bagay din yun…

        kung yung mga artista gusto maging politician, avah karapatan din ng politician na maging artista…

        khit wala ka sa showbiz or pulitika, kung korap ka…korap ka talaga!!!

        Like

      2. naku @chiwee ndi kailangan ni Shalani kung lyk mo sya o hindi! ang mahalaga enjoy sya ngayon at kumikita…

        bahala ka kung apektado ka sa pagpasok ni shalani sa show ni wili…in the 1st place ang mukha mo lang magkaroon ng maraming wrinkles dhil sa kunsumi…

        go, Shalana…hayaan mo ang mga ayaw sa iyo… 😀

        Like

    1. agree. I switched channels last night – my regular early evening news to this trash show – out of curiosity lang. i guess a lot of people did it too. but sadly, after the part na yung pinakilala sha at nagsalita sha ng reasons why she is hosting now, i felt it was a waste of time to continue watching her.

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      1. what’s your prob eddibumangon? stiff neck, bed sores? lika, mey de saksak akong massager. 220 V. tanggal lahat yan. 🙂

        so how can you expect me to give the same trust or benefit of doubt to someone i didn’t vote in the first place? it’s my opinion. cares ko kung cares mo. same goes here sa blog ni PH. cares nya kung tamman ka or matawa ka na lang kung ikaw ay tinatamaan sa satire nya or hindi.

        apektado ka ng comments ko? ewwww. kababaw mo.

        thanks anyway, am flattered. 😀

        Like

      2. @chiwee: sabi mo kilala mo na si PNoy since the days of Ninoy’s assasinations. At alam mo rin na sa ilang taon na naging kongresman at senador itong si PNoy ay wala itong ginawa except mag-butas ng silya at tumanggap ng pork barrel, and yet binoto mo sya maging Pres…dhil sabi mo bigyan ng chance…

        tapos itong si Shalani na ndi mo kilala gaya ng sabi mo ay nag-husga ka kaagad dhil pumasok lang ito sa show ni Wili…at sabi mo kaagad walang karapatan mag-host, at nawalan ka ng respeto sa kanya…

        OO ginamit ni PNoy si Shalani para pagtakpan ang kanyang “pagkatao”, para ipalabas sa publiko na siya ay Macho… echosera!!!!

        Like

      3. eddi OA naman reaction mo.

        Shalani isnt running the country, PNoy is. It’s not hypocrisy na mas mahaba ang pisi mo para sa isang tao kaysa dun sa isa.

        Showbiz needs a certain kind of personality. You either have it or you don’t. Shalani doesn’t have it. Period. She’s only there because of the breakup and Willie ever the opportunist strikes.

        Anyway, yung mga Shalani defenders dyan, make sure you spend more than an hour of your precious time daily to watch Shalani and Willie do “public service”. Otherwise sino kaya ang hypocrites.

        Like

    2. sus, kaka-umpisa pa lang noong tao, reklamo ka kaagad. si PNoy nga binoto mo na kahit nag-butas lang ng silya sa kongreso at senado…

      si Kris nga ilang beses na pumatol sa may asawa ay ndi pa rin nadala…ilang taon na ba si Kris A sa showbiz pero hanggang ngayon BANO pa rin umarte sa kamera….

      bigyan mo ng panahon si Shalani….

      Like

      1. avah, wala na yatang umamin na may bomoto kay PNoy ah!!! 😀

        ay naku, Brixter kahit kakain pa ng ilang libong sakong asin si Shalani at least may pag-asa pa siyang gagaling maging host. basta ang mahalaga na umpisahan na niya ngayon at kumikita sya….and she is enjoying it…

        si Kris A nga naging “other woman”, nagkatulo, bumili ng batang lalake para maging asawa, hiniwalayan ang batang asawa, naghahabol kay Jun2 Binay ay hanggang ngayon BANO pa rin umarte sa harap ng kamera…

        Like

      1. JUICEMIO! Anong kaguluhan ito?

        MAGSITAHIMIK KAYO! MAGSASALITA AKO!

        Bwahahahahaha!

        Kidding aside, whatever it is that prompted Shalani to accept the hosting job, aba eh sa kanya na lang yun!

        My googles! Give the lady a chance at life!

        Di na nga magiging First Lady, di pa rin pwedeng maging host ng TV show?

        Dapat bang magmukmok na lang siya dahil break na sila ni Pnoy? Kyusme, no?

        @chiwee: If I know, kung sayo in-offer ni Willie ang chance, I’m sure grab mo rin kaagad! And if ever, I’m shore, pareho din kayo ni Shalani bano sa hosting on the first few outings sa show! Ahihihihihi!
        Oh, wag na kasing magde-deny … sige ka, magiging kamukha mo si Mai Missedlang at ipi-feature kayo ni Gus Abelgas sa SOCO, keri mo yun?

        Pagbigyan na natin si Shalani… at tama si Lola Nila, malay mo malaki ang maitutulong nung talent fee nya sa mga proyekto niya sa kanyang distrito.

        Like

      2. 🙂
        nice try on the horoscope ni tomas attempt echos. if i were a prof or judge in this category, i’d give you a flat 1.0 or a perfect 10 out of of 10 for the effort.

        sadly though, you’re a failure on being sure about me on that. 🙂

        thers’s more to life for me than hosting for the sake of money or fame. am too young, pretty, smart and over-qualified for the job. ehehehe.

        peace and have a happy holidays to you and your family in advance. sincerely.

        Like

    1. okey, okey, cge na, hayaan na natin si shalani sa kanyang bagong defense portal. ke magcomplement sya kay willie o magkalat sya, bigyan natin ng espacio, benefit of the doubt, wachamakolit… give her the privilege; all the laxity, the patience, the tolerance, the sympathy, the willingness, take note, the willing-williness… hindi dahil magaling siya o kaya niya ang work.. kundi dahil siya! siya! at wala nang iba! si shalani… bow! and the rest… let’s watch out for history!!!

      Like

      1. Amen to that @promdi. I am really ambivalent on this latest move of Shalani mainly because she appears to be as very regal and decent. And Willie is the exact opposite. But as you very well said it, hayaan na lang muna natin. The reasons are a-plenty…. a woman scorned by a rich elitist man and his kin, her (submissive girlfriend) family wanting to get back at the man and his family’s shabby treatment of the submissive and scorned girlfriend…etc., many things we are not yet privy to (because P-Noy has told sis Kris not to mention anything in her tweets). One day, pieces will be put together….so let’s just pray that Shalani comes out of this well.

        Like

  4. i2ng c prof ang galing sumagap ng mga reliable na balita. biruin mo e 22o ngang bumalik c kabayan at c ate koring.

    kawawa nman ung mag-asawang tin2 at julius. nagbanat ng buto s paggising s UKG tpos sinibak pareho. c julius bcoz of work napag-initan p ni gloria. tpos e2 inalis dn siya s tv patrol. remember tita mel? d b idinemanda niya ang abs dahil s pagsibak dn s kaniya?

    tanong ko lng, ganiyan ba ang kapamilya hindi magkaka-sundo?

    weder2 lng tlga ang buhay.

    Like

    1. history na yan, dan darleng; ang abs open secret na snake pit. kaya pag napunta ka dyan, dapat matatag buto mo, as in mala-bruce willis na die hard; matira matibay; otherwise, escapo or twilight zone aabutin mo! galing mg-pirate yan ng mga shining armor ng ibang network, hindi dahil magaling yung talent, kundi para mapilay yung kalaban. tapos, you’re gonna be dumped unceremoniously later, depending on your skin tone and muscle strength. he he he..

      Like

  5. Kara David of GMA 24-Oras draws flak for controversial tweets last Nov.7 “News programs should be watched for the content and credibility of its news, not the looks and ‘sex appeal’ of its presenters”. A minute later, she added, “Bato-bato sa langit tamaan huwag magalit.” (Manila Bulletin)

    Many branded her tweet as “cheap,” her sentiments “bitter” or “threatened.”

    Obviously!!!!!!

    Like

      1. You’re wrong barok. I’m not a fan of Shalani.

        Di ko lang maintindihan kung bakit kailangang bastusin siya, just because she decided to accept the hosting job with willie.

        We can always attack her hosting skills or should I say, the lack of it pero yung sobrang bastusan, I think foul na yun.

        It’s heckling at its worst!

        Like

  6. i have banned my housekeepers and staff from watching willing willie. what trash. it is just endless noise and endless product endorsements. rice and videoke for the masses. it keeps them from thinking and as the most popular tv programme says a lot about filipinos. but nothing good as usual. does nobody have interest in art culture and self improvement. 3rd world tv. and greed. and no desire to improve.

    Like

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