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SET UP

19 08 2010

Torture Video
ABS-CBN News aired Tuesday a footage of a suspected holdupper allegedly being tortured by Senior Insp. Joselito Binayug, a Manila police precinct commander. Of Binayug’s act, DOJ Secretary Leila De Lima said, “That’s ghastly!” Manila Mayor Alfredo Lim lamented, “That’s inhumane.” Retired Major General Jovito Palparan blurted out, “That’s my boy!”

Torture Video II
Have you seen the “torture video” shown first and exclusively by ABS-CBN News? It was so horrible, watching it repeatedly feels like watching Kris Aquino on “Pilipinas Win na Win” everyday!

Out on Bail
Moments after Ilocos Sur Rep. Ronald Singson was allowed to post bail of one million Hong Kong dollars (a month after he was arrested for drug possession), his father, Ilocos Sur Governor Luis ‘Chavit’ Singson said Ronald may have been “set up,” citing politics and business as possible motives. Set up?!? He’s 41, a congressman, and was set up? Either Chavit himself is on drugs or he is possessed. (Or both.)

New SSS President
President Aquino has appointed Emilio De Quiros Jr., brother of Inquirer columnist and rabid Noynoy supporter, Conrado De Quiros as SSS president. After signing De Quiros’ appointment papers, President Aquino explained, “His being the brother of Conrad de Quiros is not relevant to his appointment.” The President didn’t explain though the relevance of his being defensive.

Top 5 Text Messages Received By Inquirer Columnist Conrado De Quiros Following the Appointment of His Brother to the SSS

No. 5: “Hindi dapat maliitin ang iyong naging ambag sa aking tagumpay. Pangako… hindi ako magiging ganid. – Nagmamahal, ang iyong Kapatid”

No. 4: “O, masaya ka na?!? – Sincerely, Korina”

No. 3: “Let’s celebate brod. Inuman tayo! Isama mo ang iyong kapatid sa SSS. Isasama ko ang aking bayaw sa DOST. This is my new # nga pala! – Executive Secretary Jojo Ochoa.”

No. 2: “So, pa’no? Love love love na tayo? – Dinky Soliman, the Hyatt 10 and the Liberal Party”

And the No. 1 text message received by Inquirer columnist Conrado De Quiros following the appointment of his brother to the SSS…

“Congratulations! May kapamilya ka na rin sa gobyerno. Kaya sana, tigilan mo na ang pamilya ko! – Yours truly, Butch Abad”

Light Bites: Noon at Ngayon
NOON: Kamag-anak, Incorporated
NGAYON: Kaklase, Incorporated

NOON: Paglaki ko, gusto kong maging doktor!
NGAYON: Paglaki ko, gusto kong maging SBMA administrator!

NOON: “Pangako, ipapamahagi namin ang lupain ng Hacienda Luisita!”
NGAYON: “Stock option na lang. Hala, pirma!”

NOON: Ang pag-torture ng mga pulis, nakatago!
NGAYON: Ang pag-torture ng mga pulis, naka-video!

NOON: Ang Executive Order ng Pangulo… isinasapubliko saka ‘pinapatupad.
NGAYON: Ang Executive Order ng Pangulo… isinasapubliko saka pina-fine-tune.

NOON: Ang press conference ng spokesman ng palasyo… sa palasyo!
NGAYON: Ang press conference ng spokesman ng palasyo… sa ANC Studio!

NOON: Ang Executive Secretary… maingay, naghahamon ng debate.
NGAYON: Ang Executive Secretary… tahimik, naghahamon ng inuman.

NOON: Ang NFA rice, isinasaing; kinakain ng taumbayan!
NGAYON: Ang NFA rice, isinasaing; ‘pinapakain sa babuyan!

NOON: Ang pulitiko, tumatakbo upang maging senador.
NGAYON: Ang senador… tumatakbo.

NOON: Ang gustong maging kongresista… tumatakbo sa eleksyon.
NGAYON: Ang nahalal na kongresista… tumatakbo palabas ng sesyon.

NOON: Ang kongresista, nagco-coffee.
NGAYON: Ang kongresista, nagco-Coke. [Oops, pasensya. Na-set up nga lang pala.]

NOON: Ang House Speaker… numero unong promotor ng pamamahagi ng pork barrel.
NGAYON: Gano’n pa rin.

NOON: “No new taxes if elected” (Habang nangangampanya)
NGAYON: “Hindi ito bagong tax. Sisihin n’yo si Gloria!
—————-
“The healthy man does not torture others – generally it is the tortured who turn into torturers.”
~Carl Jung

This just in!
Authorities in Orange, California nabbed 31-year-old Filipino Michael Lallana for allegedly ejaculating into an officemate’s water bottle on two separate occasions. Sought for comment, Lallana said he may have been set up because of business or ‘office politics.’

Breaking News!
Twitter now has 1.8M active ‘users’ in the Philippines. The previous record was held by Rufa Mae Quinto.

Corny Corner
Tanong: Sino ang anak ni Manuel L. Quezon?
Sino pa? Eh ‘di… ang Wikang Pambansa.
‘Di ba sabi nila si Manuel L. Quezon ang Ama ng Wikang Pambansa!
[Aarrgh! Ang corny nga!]

What’s UP?
The UP Fighting Maroons lost its ninth straight game in the UAAP cage wars. And they lost badly. Their 0-9 slate is unnerving. I appeal to Chairman Etta Rosales of the Commission on Human Rights to please intervene. This continuing massacre of the premiere State University’s basketball team is disturbing. Have mercy!

Enjoy the rest of the week!

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75 responses

19 08 2010
Rowell Santiago

ayos!

Like

19 08 2010
DEL

Panalo na naman yung kay kris, hahaha.

Noon: kinukwestiyon ang appointment ng mga kaibigan at kamag-anak sa gobyerno
Ngayon: Dinedepensahan (ng mga kumukuwestion noon)

Like

21 08 2010
mommy

agree! Plus ang kamag-anak incorporated ngayon extended sa mga kaklase, kaibigan pati na rin mga kaibigan ni Kris. (Boy abunda’s hubby)

Like

19 08 2010
Rowell Santiago

ph, nagsulat ka na lang ng blog kaysa manood ng laro ng UP?

Like

19 08 2010
Worried Pinoy

Corny nga! hehehe

Like

19 08 2010
chard lazaro

panalo lahat ng blog entries mo sir.. =) sobrang nakakatuwa na may kaakibat ding mga realidad tungkol sa mga nangyayari sa ating bansa.. =)

Like

18 05 2013
Wilfredo Baguio

Well Said… Mr. Rotary President ng San Carlos, PangasinaN… Sana, tapusin u na ang pag hiding nyo ng Teacher mo na may 3 anak. total, may anak na rin lang kayo. at alam ng buong CYBER SPACE- Comment naman dyan Mr. Richard “CAHRD” Lomibao Lazaro nang Anlavo Coliling San Carlos…

Like

19 08 2010
etchosera

Hehehehehe! In furnace PH, natawa ako sa pagka super mais talaga ng Corny Corner mo ….. alam mong pilit na pilit, no?

Naalala ko tuloy ito:

“Kung ang nanay mo ang ilaw ng tahanan….. eh asan ang switch?”

Like

19 08 2010
eddibumangon

ROFL! Hahaha! Joker ka talaga etchos!

Agree Mr. PH, mais na mais nga ang Corny Corner. But as usual, kwela yung tungkol kay Kris.

Like

19 08 2010
shaoie

NOON: Paglaki ko, gusto kong maging doktor!
NGAYON: Paglaki ko, gusto kong maging SBMA administrator

kung alam ko lng ito noon.. di sanay pinangarap ko maging SBMA administrator at super yaman ko sana ngayon hmp!!

Like

19 08 2010
Sylar

Yun yun e! Mais!

Like

19 08 2010
Sean

hahaha.. galing… hindi na ako updated sa TV news.. pero dito, updated na updated ako, pero kakatawa nga lang…

Like

19 08 2010
cecille

lol, i like torture video no. 2. go PH!!! rock on 🙂

Like

19 08 2010
jde0218

naset up lang po ako na magcoment dito. lol

Like

19 08 2010
professionalheckler

now that is funny! 🙂

Like

19 08 2010
promdi

haay, noted mo rin pala ph ang ingay sa wawawee, este, win na win… dine sa bayan namin, ang tawag sa nangyayari sa amin pag watch kami ng win na win: natutuligg! as in nabibingi’t nababaliw sa inis combined! kakalokah ang mga squeaks ni ate krissy. bakit kaya laging hi-wang boses nya, and the rest of the gang dun? super aksaya battery, sa truth lang!?

naalala ko tuloy yung isa pang mais na mais na ngayong joke right after Pnoy’s SONA. di ba wala nun si Ate Krissy nagvakasyon grand sa Tate. Sa isang maagang press conference nun na super-hot pa ang wang-wang issue.
Tanong daw ng isang reporter kay Pnoy: Mr. Prex, mukha po yatang tahimik ang bunso nyo ngayon, di ko yata naririnig man lang?
Pnoy: Ano ka ba, di ba sinabi ko na sa bayan, walang wang-wang!?”…

Like

19 08 2010
esa

promdi (17:20:53) : …”kakalokah ang mga squeaks ni ate krissy. bakit kaya laging hi-wang boses nya, and the rest of the gang dun? super aksaya battery, sa truth lang!?”

Promdi, you hit the nail right on its head here. Ha-ha! But she was ausente today in PWNW. Sick daw yata? My wild guess is that she felt kind of low…because of the low rating of PWNW (w/her on the show) vs. Eat Bulaga…And bossy, bossy pati kay Robin. Lalo pa sa ibang kasamahan. Hayun nagleave si Robin, followed by Mariel even if PWNW is relatively new (the program’s name, that is…since PWNW is recycled Wowowee). This Kristeta is really getting into the nerves of so many people lately, self-centered as she is and getting grabe by the day. Blah-blah-blah nang blah-blah-blah….Hindi yata nakikinig sa mga pangaral at pakiusap ng mga kapatid niya.

Like

20 08 2010
promdi

amen, i say to you, esa! sa saying na weather-weather lang! think, the weather for her is come… with phillip & joey all far behind us now, and lately , ruffa, james, and win na win , plus all the pains and discomfort of having her as neighbor where she lives now slowly creeping in the open… mukhang nag-lie low na ang rating nya. are we guys tired and pissed? hay, buti yata magcool off na talaga sya! squeakingly affected na kaya ang madlang people dahil consistent at sunod-sunod ang mga nega diskarte niya….

Like

22 08 2010
sam

to esa: tama ka dyan. bakit cya natatanging ganun sa magkakapatid? was she shugged as a child???!!!! sobrang kulang sa pansin>

to promdi: i disagree about her cooling off…..WHY doesn’t she disappear nalang into thin air? FOR GOOD! hehehe

Like

19 08 2010
kaye

LOL @ torture watching Kris Aquino in her new show

sabi nga, weather weather lang yan…abads noon, de quiros ngayon…sino naman kayang susunod? mga kamag-anak ni dinky soliman? o kaanak ni mar roxas a.k.a. korina sanchez? 🙂

As for UP losing its 9th game…nakakalungkot pero sabi ko nga before, di na nakapagtataka. still, i will cheer for the Maroons, no matter what.

Like

19 08 2010
esa

Yes, expected naman always…pero you’re right, UP Maroons pa rin, CHEERS!!! Bawi na lang sa ibang bagay ang mga Iskolar ng Bayan. Ha-ha!

Like

19 08 2010
Tweets that mention SET UP « The Professional Heckler -- Topsy.com

[…] This post was mentioned on Twitter by inday espina varona and inday espina varona, Leo Lastimosa. Leo Lastimosa said: SET UP http://ping.fm/8G50D […]

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19 08 2010
maria makiling

Minamahal kong PH: Nais ko lang ipaabot sa iyo ang aking paghanga sa yaman at lawak ng paghipo mo sa iba’t ibang isyung panlipunan, pampulitika, pangshobiz, pangsports, pangglobal, at pangbuong kalawakan.

Hanga rin ako sa bilis ng iyong utak at panulat, kasama ang maaray na sundot sa bawat isyu, na pinapakinis lang ng tinatawag na humor o katatawanan. Totoong kahala-halakhak ang bawat linya, ngunit sa totoo lang, lubhang masakit at malungkot ang mga eksena, kung hindi lang sa kiliti na maagap mong ikinakana sa bawat isa.

Biling-bili ang mga tagasubaybay mo na sa malas ay mula sa halos lahat ng antas ng pamumuhay sa iba’t ibang panig ng mundo; sa iyong mga tagasunod na halatang dumarami at kumakapal ang pila sa bawat labas ng blag mo, kasama na ako dun… Tama ang sinabi ng isa mong tagasunod na nauna sa akin sa pahinang ito; para kang nagbabasa na rin ng diyaryo na sinusuyod ang lahat ng bahagi nito habang may bonus, na wala naman sa mga dyaryo… ito nga ay ang kiliti at halakhak na lubhang kailangan ng bawa’t Pilipino, sa harap ng mga nakakasiphayong eksenang, pauli-ulit lamang naman, sa iba-ibang tauhan, bersiyon, at panahon.

Salamat sa walang hintong LOL. Sana’y tumawa tayo nang tumawa, ngunit sa paraang di namamanhid at nananatiling mulat at gising para sa ikabubuti ng ating bayang magiliw at mahal!

Mabuhay PH; mabuhay mga kapanalig at mga kalahing hekler!

Like

19 08 2010
professionalheckler

ako ay nangingiti habang binabasa ang iyong kumento. akmang-akma ang iyong pananalita sa buwan ng wika. maraming salamat sa paghimpil sa aking maliit na puwang sa cyberspace. mabuhay ka rin!

Like

19 08 2010
eddibumangon

It’s unfair! Hindi wika ni Balagtas ang gamit sa baryong pinagmulan ko. Subalit akin pong pilitpitin at pag nagkamali paumanhin niyo ay pauna ko nang hinihingi.

‘Halina na kayo’t tayoy tumahak sa matwid na landas’, yakag ng ating pang-gulo. Sagot ko naman: Mahal na pang-gulo, bago mo hikayatin kaming milyon-milyong boss mo, nagiisa mong sistah, pakitulak sa tuwid na landas. 🙂

Like

20 08 2010
Worried Pinoy

hindi ko ma-arok ang kaibuturan ng kailalim-laliman ng iyong pananaw katoto. Anak ng wika talaga oh! =)

Like

20 08 2010
kaye

lol @ pang-gulo. that’s one way of putting it… o kaya Noynoy bilang Pangulo at Kris bilang Pang-gulo. i think even the president’s supporters here won’t be able to refute that. 😉

Like

21 08 2010
eddibumangon

Worried Pinoy,

It’s simple. Before Pnoy starts leading the more than 90 million Filipinos to the straight path, he should start with his sister.

Got it now? Duh!

Like

22 08 2010
amateur heckler

sounds like PNoy’s speechwriter.

Like

19 08 2010
stalker

puge ni Tongressman sa picture ah! kagulang gulang talaga! lintek ka bakit ka pa nakapag bail! mabulok ka na sana jan sa Hangkang!

Like

19 08 2010
jasper

hamon kay chavit.

pa drug test mo ang 41 years old na anak mong na “set up” kuno. pag drug free resulta maniniwala ako sa sinabi mo na “set up.”

Like

19 08 2010
jasper

mag tago na kayo mga taga naia nag escort kay cong ronald singson, pati na rin kayo mga taga immigration, customs at PAL na may kinalaman sa pag process at paglipad ng anak ni chavit. na “set up” daw si ronald kanya may lilitaw na fall guy.

abangan……..

Like

20 08 2010
phreddox

ginagago tayo ni Chavit… kala siguro ang mga tao eh uto-uto heheh

Like

19 08 2010
Rowell Santiago

Set-up! – Tatay ni Cong. Singson Tama! – Nanay ni Jason Ivler & Ivan Padilla

Like

19 08 2010
roch

PH, pinagbibigyan lang natin ang ibang basketball teams kaya ganyan. Nung nagpaulan kasi ng kabaitan, sinalo na natin lahat. Ilang taon na rin tayong nagbibigay. Sana maging selfish naman ang UP kahit isang beses lang! wahahaha

Laban UP! :))

Like

19 08 2010
reviewer22

it was reported that a couple from hong kong placed the bail for congressman singson. I didn’t know that the Arroyos were from hong kong.

Gaya ng sabi mo PH, UP has been consistent. Consistently losing. Hayz, mabuti kung katulad ito ng NBA at PBA na may draft ng rookies. At least consuelo de bobo mo ang unang pumili dahil kulelat ka.

Like

19 08 2010
kriz

super duper torture siguro if while tino torture yung suspected holdupper e pinapanood pa ng pilipinas win na win hehehe

Like

19 08 2010
Rowell Santiago

ung pagpapalabas ng tv patrol ng “kris aquino news” gabi-gabi? form of torture un ha!

Like

20 08 2010
mbw

the court jester strikes again, PH! Thumbs up for seeing it in a searing way! Sorry, baluktot ang Tagalog ko…anak ako sa labas ni Manuel L. Quezon :-).

Like

23 08 2010
etchosera

anak sa labas? di ka man lang pinapasok?

Like

20 08 2010
topdog

Again and again, superlike Mr. PH!

Pero talo ka na lolo ko. Yoong lolo ko ay nag-bail kahit hindi nahuli o nakulong… (ay, mais!)

Like

20 08 2010
etchosera

sige lang topdog, try lang ng try….. malay mo, sa susunod, eh mas mais pa rin!

hahahahaha!

Like

20 08 2010
promdi

okay na sana si guv chavit sa kanyang first dof (declaration of feelings!) nung pumutok ang newsbomb kay cong. ronald na hijo nya. na-touch pa nga ako dun sa “mea culpa” stet nya at paghingi ng tawad lalo na sa Kailocohan na balwarte nila…. at sinabi hindi nya kukunsintihin at di sya makikialam… eh ngayon… pa’no yung set-up boom na pinapasabog nya? nakikiride na siya? at sa unahan pa! haay whatever… your son was caught red-handed… no ifs, no buts… sa kongreso, dapat automatic suspension yan for extreme misbehavior unbecoming of a mambabatas (kuno!), of all people. yan ay kung natatameme pa silang sipain nang todo yan1ngayon; but that will follow! it ought to!!

Like

20 08 2010
PANFILO LACSON

NOON: Ang pulitiko, tumatakbo upang maging senador.
NGAYON: Ang senador… tumatakbo

Aray..pinaparinggan mo na naman ako THP..

Like

20 08 2010
topdog

Nationwide, Business confidence to Noynoy is at 59%. Yoong mga tinanong na businessmen na taga Hacienda Luisita is even higher at 200%!

Like

20 08 2010
Rufa Mae Quinto

wat in da hell?

Like

20 08 2010
J

Professional Heckler,

Filipinas Shinbun (http://filipinasnews.com), a monthly tri-lingual newspaper that caters to Filipinos in Japan, published your blog post “Top 12 Things Kris Aquino Would (Not) Say In Her SONA If She Were President” in its August issue without attribution to you.

Here’s the link: http://filipinasnews.com/yahoo_site_admin/assets/docs/FS5.226175759.gif

The newspaper is a fledgling publication. I got my copy because they were persuading my company to advertise in their paper. But seeing that plagiarism is a big turn off.

For you information.

J

Like

20 08 2010
professionalheckler

that’s so sad. hayaan mo na sila. SIGH.

Like

20 08 2010
BAROK

tsk..tsk..tsk, pwede naman nila i-google para alamin ang source (assuming di nila alam or napulot lang sa email)

Like

20 08 2010
melo

To quote Mr.Jim Paredes’ comment in Twitter: “Utot mo.Chavit”….Gusto mo set-up ka kaya namin sa mga starlets ng Kapuso at Kapamilya….

Like

20 08 2010
DEL

Noon: Mga blogger(di pa nag-eexist), ang binabasa, mga article ng columnist
Ngayon: Ang mga columnist, nagbabasa na ng article ng mga blogger.

Astig ka PH, nakita ko yung blog ni Bong Austero, nakalista ka sa favorite blog niya, hahaha.

Like

20 08 2010
timpaul

who’s Bong Austero?

Like

22 08 2010
etchosera

ma at pa!

idagdag mo na rin ang …. KEBS!

Like

20 08 2010
senior60

sa wakas, may naani na si conrado…

Like

20 08 2010
Anonymous

syempre. alangan naman ibigay sa kapatid ni pedrosa.

Like

20 08 2010
juanaganda

..para bang palaging pinipisil ang kun__l ni Kris sa Pilipinas Win Na Win! parang mas tolerable pa ‘yung kasisigaw ‘nya sa Feng Shui…

Like

20 08 2010
marsheemarsh

iba ka talaga forever heckler!!! ahahaha!!

grabe yung kay conrado de quiros. ay dyusko PNoy gudlak talaga sa yo

panalo yung Noon at Ngayon di ka maubusan ng gimik! 😀

lastly: UP FIGGGGGGGGGGGHT!!!! hahahaha

Like

20 08 2010
BAROK

super like the 5 text messages and noon at ngayon 🙂

Like

20 08 2010
Juan

I hate Kris Aquino!

Like

22 08 2010
Krissy

The feeling is mutual! Gosh!

Like

20 08 2010
bella

hay kelan kaya mananalo ang UP… 😦

Like

21 08 2010
Noynoy

Ayan nabulgar na ang tunay na gawain ng Pinoy kay Michael Lallana! Proud to be PINOY!!

Like

22 08 2010
tim

singson begs for understanding.
ok then. i understand
you are a spoilt little boy who does not have the decency, cojones,
or integrity even to own up, but to get daddy to sort it out
and to make up more lies in your pathetic defence.
low life like you who, we all in showbiz ,know have played with drugs
for years has no place in congress or decent society.

Like

22 08 2010
Iloka

Bakit galit kayu kay Kris ? Dahil ba sa siya ay Boss-y ? Parepareho lang kayung mga Bossing. Bossing ni P-Noy ! Yan ang Demokrasya. Enjoy natin.

Matalinu din ba si James Yap, magaling ang gimmick. Pakumbaba parang santo. Baka na set-up din habang tulog. 🙂 Kawawa. Mga biktimang Pinoy. Sabit.

Like

22 08 2010
etchosera

Ano ba tinira mo ‘dre?…… lakas ng tama mo!

Pati ako, nahilo sayo!

Like

23 08 2010
kaye

panalo. tawa na naman ako ng tawa sayo ms. etchosera. hahahaha!

infernez, pareho tayo ng reaksyon. 😀

Like

22 08 2010
Paz H. Diaz

The Commission on Human Rights is right next door to the UP College of Human Kinetics Gym (covered court (?) where the basketball and other sports teams practice…quite easy for the CHR to investigate the matter!

Like

23 08 2010
kaye

wow. is this the Ma’am Paz Diaz of the College of Mass Comm, who was my thesis adviser? napunta na rin siya dito, PH. 😀

Like

23 08 2010
professionalheckler

hi ma’am. thanks for dropping by! 🙂

Like

22 08 2010
sam

sino hubby ni boy chaka abunda?

Like

22 08 2010
tim

when kris aquino is in her grave if she sees someone young, powerful , or rich
in the next one she will be in it in a heartbeat. no morals and no dignity.
and so vengeful. what on earth is she doing on a primetime teenagers show, except for lining up some
young meat to satisfy her insatiable ego and perversions

Like

23 08 2010
james toledo

this is how kris aquino deals with the contestants….

Like

23 08 2010
promdi

aray ko!! sakit naman nito… i wouldn’t exchange my life for that of the contestant… hu hu hu. how insulting naman. nakakahurt ng ego, ng pride, ng esteem, ng dignidad! sabagay, ganyan naman ang noontime show ng abs; kahit nun pang wowowyyy! when did they ever care about the so-called dignity of their poor poor victims, este, contestants!

Like

24 08 2010
etchosera

ayyyyyyyy! todo na ‘to! may beyju na!

poor ka na talaga PH! sagot nga saken ng telepono ko…..cannot be rich!

ahah ahah ahah!

Like

24 08 2010
banjo

bitay na c singson. bwelta mga taga HK dahil sa nangyari sa mga tourist hostages nila napatay d2.

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