UNDENIABLY, the most talked about subject of conversations during the past week was the new president, Benigno Simeon ‘Noynoy’ Aquino III. In close second was the ‘wang-wang.’

The schedule of Benigno Simeon ‘Noynoy’ Aquino III on his first three days as president was really hectic. He swore into office 200 local executives, convened his cabinet for their first meeting, hosted a reception for foreign dignitaries, got stuck in heavy metro traffic, and performed two numbers in a variety show.

Arguably, the third most popular subject of the past week was the James Yap-Kris Aquino separation. Last Thursday, the basketball star released a statement saying he’ll do everything to fix his marriage, or as palace spokesman Edwin Lacierda would call it, “fine tuning.”

Presidential spokesman Edwin Lacierda couldn’t say whether President Noynoy Aquino took a rest or not on his first weekend in office. Lacierda said he didn’t know Aquino’s weekend schedule. He doesn’t seem to know anything at this moment. In fact, Lacierda’s not even sure if he’s still Aquino’s spokesman.

Memo Circular No. 1
This is embarrassing. Released on President Aquino’s first day in office, Memorandum Circular No. 1 declaring all positions of non-career executive service officials (Non-Ceso) vacant was withdrawn and reissued. I just hope they’d be successful this time because that’s exactly the same thing the Liberal Party did to Mar Roxas’ candidacy.

Mar’s Protest
Former senator Mar Roxas announced he would file an electoral protest against Vice President Jejomar Binay. Roxas loyalists believe the electoral protest will prove that he won the vice presidency and that he’s got lots and lots of spare money.

The Senate Presidency
Liberal Party’s Francis Pangilinan is confident of winning the senate presidency. He claims he has the support of Franklin Drilon, Ralph Recto, Francis Joseph Escudero, Vicente Sotto III, Teofisto Guingona III, Sergio Osmeña III, Antonio Trillanes III, Jinggoy Estrada, Juan Ponce Enrile, and Kris Aquino.

Sen. Francis Pangilinan and Sen. Manny Villar are on a collision course over the Senate presidency. Despite the backing of at least nine senators though, Pangilinan is not taking Villar lightly. As a matter of fact, Pangilinan regards Villar as the fiercest fighter he’d seen… after Sharon Cuneta.

Villar’s Bid
Reports say Sen. Manny Villar is determined to reclaim the presidency of the Senate. Aimed at helping Villar realize his dream, a rabid supporter is planning to release Sen. Francis Pangilinan’s alleged psychological and psychiatric evaluation reports next week.

Sen. Manny Villar is keen on winning the Senate presidency. In fact, Nanay Curing has been advised to prepare for a press conference.

Kris & James: A Postscript
James Yap has spoken. Addressing his wife Kris, the basketball star said, “Sa tulong ng Diyos, alam kong malalampasan natin ang pagsubok na ito!” to which God said, “Nandamay na naman!”
“Never interrupt your enemy when he is making a mistake.”
~Napoleon Bonaparte

The Who?
Gold and Silver have called it quits. And Gold has been having sleepless nights these days. A source said, “Natatakot siyang mawalan ng trabaho. Magkasama kasi sila ni Silver sa isang programa.” History shows that everyone who got involved with Silver were either compelled to resign or terminated. The list includes Krypton, Cobalt, Calcium, and Copper. Unfortunately, the relationship is beyond repair.

Again, I hate it! PNoy, P-Noy, P’Noy or P.Noy, whatever! Tigilan na ang mga pautot na ‘yan. He’s got a name. Use it.

Survey Says
Your take on the soon-to-be officially established ‘Truth Commission:’
BILIB ako diyan. Sige, habulin si Gloria! 46%
I DOUBT kung may magagawa ‘yan. 43%
No comment. 11%

We have a new survey. Please vote now.

Newsbreak: Lani Mercado’s pet bill

Newsbreak: Justices, dinner, and the Palawan cases

Have a productive week ahead!


Author: professionalheckler

See About the Heckler

65 thoughts on “REPAIRS”

      1. @Anonymous & phreddox:

        How does it feel like that your preferred President is now at the receiving end of criticisms? Surely both of you should get used to it, considering that both of you perhaps, were rabid critics of the previous administration.

        Oh c’mon guys both of you are being apologist for BS Aquino. Thing is if no substantive result is delivered after his first 100 days expect more criticism to be hurled at your preferred President. To be honest I’m far from being bitter here as I was merely pointing a fact. Either way you look at it his first three days in office were far from sterling. His intentions is unquestionable it’s his ability to lead that’s still remains to be proven. I’m actually looking forward to his first 100 days and whilst expectations were unreasonably raised by his spin doctors during the campaign I still do hope that he delivers on his promises.


      1. Correction, from Ricky Lo (who incidentally is also reporting the same thing in his paper – as in, down to the details about Pia going to Ruffa’s birthday and making paramdam efek): Vic has a child with Angela Luz, not Christine Jacob. According to Wikipedia, though, Christine did have “a short-lived affair” with Vic while she was hosting Eat Bulaga… and then moved to ABS-CBN as soon as her contract expired. OUCH.

        So I’m trying to wrap my head around the identity of the others…


  1. Hi P.H.! Please join me and my friends in promoting good citizenship through the newly formed facebook group, “What Have You Done for the Philippines Today?” It’s a venue for everyday Pinoys to inspire one another to do their share in working toward a better Philippines, day by day, one small action/idea at a time.

    ‘Hope you can join the group and invite others as well. Thanks!


    1. hi PH. long-time reader, first time to comment. i didn’t vote for noynoy but i found the above comment(s) a bit nakakapantaas-kilay lang.

      ang diyos nga nagpahinga, tao pa kaya? the presidency may be a demanding job that merits higher expectations, but it is a job all the same and the president is still human.

      sa tingin ko, we should dial down the hostility and as-of-now unfounded criticism. ok lang maging vigilant, pero wag maging fault-finder. and temper it with support. he won fair and square, after all. i mean, pati itatawag sa kanya, ang dami pang issue? anober.


      1. mea culpa! i agree with you guys na nga. BS Aquino does need a lot of breaks since he has to absorb, decipher, discern, and sift through all the advice, (unsolicited or not) he is getting from all sides. his brain can’t handle all of them for sure (which i know he knew when he decided to run for the highest position in the land). yes, let’s give the guy all the breaks he needs!


  2. Ang lupit mo naman. Puro nalang ba negative ang tingin mo sa bago nating presidente? Yung kay prof na heckling nga may kunting respeto. e, yung sa yu parang for the sake nalang na may masabi kang masama.

    Anung masasabi mu na nagtitiis si PBA mag hintay mag green ang traffic light? Ginusto nyang tiisin ang tinitiis mu araw-araw para maipakita nya sa iyo kung anung klaseng tao sya. Ug makita nato tanan nga dili sya abosado.


    1. I think you mean Eugene and not Krusty. Krusty Krab is the name of the food chain where Spongebob works. the proprietor is Eugene Krabs. I think you either mistook Mr. Krabs’ name to Krusty The Clown of The Simpsons or the name of the food chain at Bikini Bottom.

      O di ba at talagang yun lang napainsin ko sorry naman XD

      P.S. I hate Pia, grabe mang-power trip si ateh.


    1. Krypton – Kris A.
      Cobalt – Christine J.
      Calcium – Connie R.
      Copper – Chiqui H.
      Kulang pa. Angela Luz.

      For the critics of P-noy for his birth pains — you have the right to criticize naman talaga ang sinumang pinuno natin lalo pa’t meron talagang konting kapalpakan ang kanyang ilang cabinets secs. But over all, you are all realizing (esp. those who didn’t vote for him) and seeing through the kind of person he is. Mabuti, may delicadesa, integridad, at may kahihiyan, di po ba? Breath of fresh air ika nga, na matagal na nating di naranasan sa majority ng ating naging presidente.

      E yung binoto ninyong si Binay? — nakupo! Bakit ba nanalo to? Abusado talaga! Anyway, buti nga at magself-destuct na siya ngayon pa lang para naman matauhan ang 13+million na bumoto sa kanya at baka iboto uli siya pagka presidente! Now I know why Chiz endorsed him. Smart move, Chiz.


  3. worried pinoy hindi naman siguro totoo yung kasabihan
    ni krusty the crab, ibig ba nyang sabihin dalawa sina
    tomador at religiousboy sa mga yon? imposible….

    sayang naman, may ipinagawa pa naman daw na bahay si
    vic para kay pia on a 300square-meter-lot sa isang
    pangmayamang subdivision…


  4. whatever, Noynoy is a duly elected president of the country.

    eh, si goyang? she’s not a former but a never president of the Philippines. at ‘yung sinasabi ninyong kasipagan niya ay hindi ‘yung pagtupad sa gawain ng presidente kundi kung paano laging magsisinungaling at ipagyabang gumaganda ang eeeeek kuno niya (sa halip na ekonomiya) ng bansa.


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