WHAT YOSI IS WHAT YOU GET


JUST SO YOU KNOW, last May 22, the International Day for Biological Diversity was celebrated in 11 countries around the world – from Algeria to the Philippines and from Ecuador to the United Kingdom. During the celebration, Ecuador opened its largest protected wildlife zone; Algeria reported the discovery of a new reptilian species, and the Philippines confirmed that koalas were no longer endemic to Australia.

Have you been following the investigation being conducted by the Lower House on the revelations of “koala boy” as regards the alleged poll fraud? Several defeated candidates from Luzon to Visayas and Mindanao divulged that unidentified men offered to rig the automated polls in their favor for a fee. But the candidates rejected the offer because the purported ‘koala boys’ wanted the payment to be made in Australian dollars.

This just in: Feisty senator Miriam Defensor Santiago has dared “koala boy” to reveal his identity. If not, the senator will reportedly unmask the political operator behind him. Malakas umano ang kutob ng senadora na si “koala boy” ay nagtatago ngayon sa isang “puno.”

Top 5 Revelations in “Koala Boy’s” New Video Allegedly Coming Out Soon

No. 5: That the original plan was for him to appear in a gecko suit but “it’s too hot in there”

No. 4: That homosexual voters actually voted in bloc but Comelec 2nd Division Commissioners Elias Yusoph, Nicodemo Ferrer, and Lucenito Tagle shaved off thousands of votes from ‘Ang Ladlad’ and Sen. Jamby Madrigal

No. 3: That an altered version of his video exposé will be released to discredit him. Wearing only black briefs and a red bandana tied around his head, the video shows ‘koala boy’ gyrating to Justin Bieber’s remake of ‘Careless Whisper’

No. 2: That he’s willing to reveal his true identity in Congress on condition that Makati City Rep. Teddyboy Locsin won’t call him “son of a bitch” on live TV

And the No. 1 revelation in “koala boy’s” new video allegedly coming out soon…

That Smartmatic’s Cesar Flores and Comelec Commissioner Gregorio Larrazabal are “partners in crime” adding that both men fondly call each other “papa bear” in private.

In Other News…
Defeated Davao City mayoral candidate, and outgoing House Speaker Prospero Nograles has filed an electoral protest citing conspiracy on the part of his rival Sara Duterte and local poll officials. Saying he’s not sourgraping, Nograles insists he’s just after the naked truth.

Not Quitting
Noynoy Aquino says he won’t quit smoking because doing so might affect his decisions. Did you know what happened the last time he tried to stop smoking? He decided to run for president!

President-apparent Noynoy Aquino said he would not quit smoking because doing so might affect his decisions. For instance, this morning, he tried NOT to smoke. As a result, he had to grasp for an answer when his maid asked him, ‘Ser, iskrambol po ba o sony side up?”

Noynoy Aquino says he is not going to quit smoking because doing so might affect his decisions. For instance, on the day that he decided NOT to quit smoking, he was trying to quit smoking!

Top 5 Things to Tell Noynoy Aquino To Make Him Quit

No. 5: Kapag ‘di ka tumigil sa paninigarilyo, ibubunyag nina Korina Sanchez, Diana Zubiri, Bernadette Sembrano, at Barbara Milano kung bakit sila nakipag-break sa ‘yo!

No. 4: Kapag ‘di ka tumitigil sa paninigarilyo, hindi kayo puwedeng mag-computer games ni Joshua.

No. 3: Kapag ‘di ka tumigil sa paninigarilyo, magagalit si Papa Jesus!

No. 2: Kapag ‘di ka tumigil sa paninigarilyo, ibabalik sa ‘yo ni Mar Roxas si Korina Sanchez!

And the No. 1 thing to tell Noynoy Aquino to make him quit…

Kapag ‘di ka tumigil sa paninigarilyo, ikaw ulit ang presidente from 2016 to 2022!

MVP and Meralco
Effective July 1, 2010, PLDT Chairman Manuel V. Pangilinan will become chief executive officer of the country’s largest power retailer Manila Electric Company. So don’t be surprised if you and your neighbors would have similar if not identical billing statements.

Effective July 1, 2010, PLDT Chairman Manuel V. Pangilinan will be the CEO of Meralco. Also on July 1, Meralco’s tagline, “May liwanag ang buhay” will be replaced with a new slogan, “Go, Meralco! One Big Light!”

Survey Says
Should President-apparent Noynoy Aquino appoint members of the Hyatt 10 or The Firm in key government posts?
SURE. They’re capable. 18.4%
NO! TAMA NA! They’ve had their time. 63.4%
Bahala siya sa buhay niya! 18.2%

We have a new survey. Please vote now.

Elsewhere
Newsbreak: Noynoy’s ‘little president’

A Manila Standard Today Lifestyle columnist came up with his own list of the most admired TV journalists

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Author: professionalheckler

See About the Heckler

128 thoughts on “WHAT YOSI IS WHAT YOU GET”

      1. @ dede: thanks

        @ john: thanks din… ahhm.. “ruin”? hahahaha

        @ kalokah: no thanks sa tour, i have worked there for 4 years.. pang negosyo showcase? no thanks din, at mukhang ibibitin pa nga ang bayad sa smartmatic dahil sa fraud allegations.

        @chiwee: im not the real “him” but close enough coz “him” is my boss. i’ll send you an email later.. thank you in advance

        @tk: ahh.. no comment =)

        Like

  1. Now for some serious comments..

    First, thanks PH for the new article.. pampa-unwind from work-related stress together with yosi, since our president-apparent is not quitting (gud luck na lang sa anti-smoking campaign ng DOH) =) by the way, I created a blog too, you may want to visit it minsan. just click on my username at nasa wordpress din sya.

    ‘koala boy’ gyrating to Justin Bieber’s remake of ‘Careless Whisper’ >> now this I have to see.. a koala “gyrating” ^_^

    Diana Zubiri??? naging sila pala.. “ibabalik sa ‘yo ni Mar Roxas si Korina Sanchez!”.. >> winner!!!

    Like

    1. kung hindi ngayon ang panahon na para sa iyo
      wag maiinip dahil ganyan ang buhay sa mundooooooo
      wag mawawalan ng pagasa darating din ang ligaya
      lala la la la lalala la la…
      ang kaylangan moy tibay ng loob kung myrong pagsubok man…

      diko na alam kasunod e,diko kabisado,sensya na po!

      Like

  2. mapapamura ka namang talaga sa mga politicians natin, Miriam Defensor and Erap divulged that ‘Koala Boys’ have approached them, with their infinite wisdom hindi man lang nila naisip na ipahuli ang mga ito? eh ang sabi may mga dala din silang documents? ngayon mag bababanat silang merong ngang mga Koala Boys?

    Am#$!@$ naman! NAMAN!

    Like

  3. Go MERALCO!!! ONE BIG LIGHT!!! =)

    I bet Jejemon Binay wont let Noynoy stop smoking. Sayang naman yung chances na mamatay agad si Noynoy at maging presidente si Jejemon.

    I strongly agree that this Koala boy resides at a strong “Puno”. Ikaw ba naman ang mabigyan ng millions just to tell a lie and cover your fucked-up face, di ka ba papayag? Eto naman mga talunan, obviously, nakiki-sakay sa puno. Palibhasa anlalaki ng pera na nalustay. Mga gunggong talaga.

    Like

    1. only shows what such bigots are for some of our kababayans.
      heck. if you want to stop smoking, then torch all the tobacco fields in the country.
      shut down all the tobacco plants as well.
      put to jail all the tagatak boys selling tingi tingi yosi sticks to our drivers and passengers at our roads.
      kill (?) all of our street vendors selling these tingi-tingi sticks, too.

      it was during soon-to-be-ex PGMA’s time when Philip Morris established a regional plant here for the whole of asia.

      ex president FVR had photos brandishing him with a cigar.

      Like

    2. FVR was a former smoker. When he was President, he quits BUT still carry around a cigar. He never lights it, inaamoy nya lang from time to time, cguro as part of his withdrawal from smoking.

      Im not sure about Erap, I never seen him smoke IN PUBLIC.

      PGMA HATES smoking, even the smell of tobacco and its smoke. Try lighting a cigarette sa isang closed venue kung saan darating sya.. biglang papaligiran ka ng PSG para ipa-put out sayo yung cigarette mo.

      Naging big issue kasi yang smoking kasi you have a DOH that has an anti-smoking campaign funded by tax payers money. Paano na lang kaya campaign nila kung yung President mismo eh naninigarilyo?

      Like

      1. sa maraming bansa ngayon pag napunta ka sa duty free ang mga pakete ng yosi,kung hindi nabubulok na baga o nangungulubot na mukha ng babae ang naka picture o kung anu anung kadiri ang naka picture.
        sa pinas kaya, maganda kayang idea na picture ni noynoy ang nakalagay?dina kelangang ielaborate yung epekto nung yosi sa kanya diba?
        (sabay ilag at tago,baka mabato ng mga maka noynoy)

        Like

      2. nasa process na ang proposed law na lagyan nga ng kadiring pics ang pack ng cigarettes dito sa atin, tulad ng sa ibang bansa

        kung naipropose yang suggestion mo dati na malayo pa ang end of term ni gma, malamang mapapansin pa. pero now na papasok na ang 2nd aquino admin, di na papansin yang suggestion mo

        (sabay tago din sa crossfire)

        Like

  4. Defeated Davao City mayoral candidate, and outgoing House Speaker Prospero Nograles has filed an electoral protest citing conspiracy on the part of his rival Sara Duterte and local poll officials. Saying he’s not sourgraping, Nograles insists he’s just after the naked truth.

    — duh! kahit kelan, nakakahiya talaga tong si nograles. Sore loser. Di talaga matanggap na wala syang naipanalo kahit isang presinto dito sa Davao, kahit pa sa distrito nya! Kung di lang talaga kasalanan sa Diyos ang “mangkulam ng butete”… hmmmmmmmppppppppppppp

    Like

    1. Mga hunghang sila!

      Huwag silang mamili ng boto upang kung hindi manalo ay walang dahilan para magreklamo. Parepareho lang namang pagpapayaman ang puntirya kaya gustong makarating sa konggreso, sa kapitolyo o sa munisipyo.

      Gayundin, bantayan ang mga taga Comollect na siyang naging pasimuno ng katiwalian tuwing eleksiyon. Ginagawa nilang negosyo ang kanila posisyon upang magkamal ng salapi tuwing ikatlong taon. Dapat sa kanila ay tanggalin lahat sa puwesto dahil sila ay mga latak ng kawalanghiyaan ng mga Arroyo.

      Like

  5. No. 5: Kapag ‘di ka tumigil sa paninigarilyo, ibubunyag nina Korina Sanchez, Diana Zubiri, Bernadette Sembrano, at Barbara Milano kung bakit sila nakipag-break sa ‘yo!

    makiki- tsika lang eh bakit nga ba PH :)…..

    Don’t be sad jaypee W. next post ni PH ikaw na 1st.

    Like

  6. chiwee

    kung gusto mong huminto sa paninigarilyo, you don’t
    have to do all those mentioned, just stop smoking,
    period…

    mister heckler

    may nakalimutan ka, si maricel morales din daw….

    at pasok sa banga ang lahat ng, top 5 things to tell noynoy…

    and truly mister heckler. your blog is an educational one,
    with a wide range of subject matters, clap clap clap…

    Like

    1. highly respectable senior60, it is easier said than done po. take it from me. 🙂

      why i was suggesting the extremes to stop smoking? because it worked for me. back at singapore, when to my horror, a marlboro lights menthol cost 11.60 SGD, and you just can’t puff a stick which has no SDPC marking in it without risking a 500 SGD fine, or throwing a butt anywhere and pay a 200 SGD fine once caught. The strict rules of that island state curbed my habit.

      but then vices are vices so are habits are habits. it’s a matter of choice. ika nga, do it at your own risk; to each his own.

      a smoking president? so what? i’d rather have him than a stealing one.

      Like

  7. “No. 5: Kapag ‘di ka tumigil sa paninigarilyo, ibubunyag nina Korina Sanchez, Diana Zubiri, Bernadette Sembrano, at Barbara Milano kung bakit sila nakipag-break sa ‘yo”

    Just a thought..Smoking affects end arteries that supply vital organs. And one, as in a straight, strong hard number 1, very “vital organ” is totally dependent on healthy arteries for its very vital function. Or it ceases to look the number 1. Baka ito ang secreto ng mga babae sa #5.

    Or maybe the size of the cigarette…Yeah, maybe the size. Or both?

    Noynoy is well-advised to stopped the habit. Or shahalani will be gone, too.

    Like

      1. ateng atchosera, si GMA ba nagaapoint?
        dipa man ako pinapatungan ng kanyang mapagpalang
        kamay e meron nakong naka ready na resignation paper,

        ” i hereby to resign my alledge moderating post to be here in PH blogsite for i cannot attend my duty as im not so intellectual to moderate those smart people involve in commenting here, may i propose chiwee or ateng etchosera to my alledge post instead”
        ta tum ta tum ta tum….
        in da name of loooove..
        before you break my hearrrrrrt!

        Like

    1. dede,

      alam mo, kahit malungkot dine sa disyerto, hindi ko inisip na maging magkasama tayo sapagkat kahit bagay tayo, sa aking pakiramdam ay magiging katawa tawa sa ibang tao.

      ipikit mo ang iyong mga mata. imadyinin mo ang hitsura natin kapag magkasama sa litrato.

      tarugong may dede! ‘ampangeeet!

      Like

  8. the decision to stop smoking is always a personal choice.
    if you want to have a shot at a long and healthy life vs a slow painful death (sometimes quick- but still painful exit).. the choice will always be a personal one
    that is the beauty of being human… the power to carve your own destiny

    Like

  9. highly respectable daw o, me ganuon?

    anyway, if meant sincerely, thank you,
    if not, kargo de konsensya mo na yan chiwee hahaha

    mabuti naman belisima at napigilan mo sarili mo, kasi,
    ayaw ko pa talaga matawag ng ganuon, itanong mo pa
    kay tomador hahaha ulit

    ikaw naman tarugong kulot, noong isang araw ka pa
    kakasunod kay dede, kasi lagi mong naalaala si dolly
    parton, ang problema lang, may mga sabit na pala kayo
    kaya iwasan ang biglang liko…

    serious naman…

    tungkol sa pag yoyosi ni noynoy, kasi his is not just a plain
    and simple smoking but already an addiction, yes, two packs
    a day is a lot kaya mahirap na talaga bitiwan, plus the fact
    na always stressful na ang kanyang life, mas lalo nyang
    kailangan, ang yosi, bow

    Like

  10. Pala, TO ALL “USELESS” commenters (useless daw o sa mga walang kaligayahan sa mundo), sa next week na naman ulit ang papremyong 100 pesos text load sa mauna.

    Every week lang ako magpa-premyo for the sake of art, dahil baka mamulubi ako at magpa-langoy langoy na lang sa dagat ng basura, haha. 🙂

    Congratulations again to ZaldS aka TGE Blog Admin. As of 4pm yesterday, he acknowledged receipt of his prize.

    Like

  11. for mr president apparent noynoy,
    sabi mo nga: bayan muna bago sarili.during the campaign, you asked the people to listen and we have given you our vote, this time the people are asking you to quit smoking for health reason.please listen.it a simple task, i know its hard but if there is a will there is a way. there are… bigger tasks ahead, how can we be sure you can handle bigger tasks when something so simple you cant handle.i know you can do it mr. president.

    Like

  12. for mr president apparent noynoy,
    sabi mo nga: bayan muna bago sarili.during the campaign, you asked the people to listen and we have given you our vote, this time the people are asking you to quit smoking for health reason.please listen.it a simple task, i know its hard but if there is a will there is a way. there are… bigger tasks ahead, how can we be sure you can handle bigger tasks when something so simple you cant handle.i know you can do it mr. president.

    Like

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