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HOLY WEAK, TOO

2 04 2010


The Professional Heckler continues to receive reports of Holy Week ‘sightings’ of political figures.

Reports say President Arroyo has never left the bedside of the First Gentleman. She cannot afford to miss Mike Arroyo’s seven last words. (If ever.)

Do you know the powerful Garcia clan of Cebu? The senakulo that they organized was one of the most controversial in recent years. A faction of the Garcia family wanted to betray Jesus but another faction stayed loyal and supported him.

In Lubao, Pampanga, Mikey Arroyo was so impressed with the performance of the guys who portrayed the role of Roman centurions that he vowed to represent them in the next Congress.

And did you hear about the reenactment of the Last Supper organized by Partido Lakas-CMD-Kampi? The 12 apostles got the shock of their lives when Gilbert Teodoro who played the role of Jesus suddenly resigned from the play.

Rumors have it the First Gentleman wanted someone else to replace Gilbert Teodoro in the senakulo. Worse, Mrs. Arroyo who personally picked Teodoro for the lead role knew about it.

But did you know what happened next when news came out that Manny Villar was the presidential bet of Mike Arroyo? Villar denied the First Gentleman three times before the cock crowed!

Sen. Loren Legarda declined an invitation to participate in a senakulo after getting word that it will be shown live in ANC and ABS-CBN.

This just in! Partido Lakas-CMD-Kampi has decided to cancel its scheduled Easter Egg Hunt Party. Instead, party leaders will be hunting for its missing members.

In a related development, Easter Egg Hunt activities in remote provinces were also canceled. This, after the CPP-NPA increased its ‘permit-to-hunt’ fees.

Albay Governor Joey Salceda volunteered to play Jesus in a senakulo in Bicol. Salceda’s favorite part of the play was when Roman soldiers placed a crown on his head.

And finally, two representatives from the Social Weather Stations and Pulse Asia were chosen to play the role of apostles in the reenactment of the Last Supper. However, they were sacked from the play when they insisted that Jesus Christ’s prediction of an apostle betraying him had a margin of error of plus or minus 2.

In the News
In San Pedro Cutud village in the City of San Fernando, Pampanga, 49-year-old sign painter Ruben Enaje, was crucified for the 24th consecutive year. Psychologists refer to that as the “Jejomar Binay Syndrome.”

In San Pedro Cutud village, sign painter Ruben Enaje, was crucified for the 24th consecutive year. If ever he’d retire, he wanted his son (or his wife) to continue what he started.
——————————
“Every country gets the circus it deserves. Spain gets bullfights. America gets Hollywood. Italy gets the Catholic Church.”
~Erika Jong

Survey Says
Are you going out of town this Holy Week break?
Definitely. Excited na nga eh. 15%
Nope. Sa bahay na lang. 76%
Not sure. Bahala na. 9%

We have a new survey. Please vote now.

Wohoo!
Congratulations to GMA7’s I-Witness (Ambulansyang De Paa) for winning in the prestigious 69th Annual Peabody Awards. Here’s the complete list of winners.

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17 responses

2 04 2010
toni

hahaha! wala ka talagang patawad PH! nice one!

Like

2 04 2010
Thel

Thanks again for good laugh! Bless your heart always for having creative mind.

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2 04 2010
chumliit

mas matanda pa pala sken na nagpapapako si ruben enaje..tibay naman nya..

we live near cutud..wala na masyadong tao ngayon na nanonood dun..

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2 04 2010
kalokah

did you watched the ‘7 last words’ on ch 2? i thought villar has “no family” that ‘can endorse’ or will endorse him on national television.

i think he found a “brother” in fr. bel san luis after father san luis “thanked family villar” on national tv.

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3 04 2010
BAROK

Too bad Gibo was the last to know that everything was just a stage play or senakulo.

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3 04 2010
senior60

i don’t think so that there is astage play or sinakulo,

the lps were the ones who concocted the term ‘villarroyo’

so that the ‘kiss of death’ will transfer to villa to the lps

advantage, now, if the members of the lakas are now jumping

ship, it’s because they think that villar has more chances at

winning and of course, moneyed…

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3 04 2010
Broking

“she cannot afford to miss mike arroyo’s seven last words. (if ever)” HA HA HA HA I COULD DIE LAUGHING!!!!

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3 04 2010
mae23md

ang galing ni villar, dami nyang support – administration, cpp-npa, kbl, bro mike, INC (?), masa crowd, cebu one….. winner!

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3 04 2010
Vina Pelaez

Thank for another good laugh! You are so amazing!

Like

3 04 2010
garju101

“Reports say President Arroyo has never left the bedside of the First Gentleman. She cannot afford to miss Mike Arroyo’s seven last words. (If ever.)”

That’s probably the best punchline on this post! LOL Can’t stop laughing Mr.PH! Good work! And although I’m pro-GIBO this one is a close second:

“But did you know what happened next when news came out that Manny Villar was the presidential bet of Mike Arroyo? Villar denied the First Gentleman three times before the cock crowed!”

Again with your permission, please allow me to post this video. More power to you Mr.PH!

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4 04 2010
Mrivera

Nanghihingalo na ba si Mike? Sigurado kaya si goyang na kasama siya sa seven last will? Hindi kaya iTOH maging masakit sa kanya kung marinig niyang wala siyang kahit konting balaTOH?

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4 04 2010
Mrivera

“Salceda’s favorite part of the play was when Roman soldiers placed a crown on his head.”

Crown para saan? Anong byuti padyant nanalo si Jolina Salceda?

Inaaaannnnnnggggg!!!!!!!

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4 04 2010
Anonymous

hahaha

“Salceda’s favorite part of the play was when Roman soldiers placed a crown on his head.”

Crown para saan? Anong byuti padyant nanalo si Jolina Salceda?
ha. ——when the roman soldiers were putting the crown on salceda’s head, hindi sa head napunta and thorn kundi sa mukha nya!!!!!

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4 04 2010
mbw

Happy, Happy Easter, PH! Thanks for helping me rise laughing out of these Calvarious political scene here!

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4 04 2010
jianne

two thumbs up. galing!

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5 04 2010
TOMADOR

poor Gibo…maganda yung jump off party nila ng Lakas-Kampi-CMD..they looked very formidable considering they had the biggest political machinery in the country tapos in the end he’ll end up being junked tsk tsk…do I hear sacrificial lamb??? galing lang ako sa probinsya namin and talked to some local polticians who were members of Lakas-Kampi-CMD..NO SUPPORT WHATSOEVER! usually mga ganitong panahon buhos ang tulong so they had to fend for themselves if not jump ship…kunsabagay yung VP bet nga nila di kayang suportahan local members pa kaya from the provinces!!! tsk tsk tsk.

I recall mentioing “exercise in futility” for Gibo…..it seems to be coming to fruition tsk tsk tsk sorry Senior60 but your “manok” won’t cut it this May 10 (unless a miracle happens), maswerte pa sya if he gets more votes than Erap 😉 Forget about accomplishments, being masipag or being matalino….let’s just face the reality.

Si FG masamang damo talaga ano? Di mamatay-matay eh LOL I know its bad to wish someone dead but I personally have to give FG the exception 😉

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5 04 2010
TOMADOR

Ayan, reiterated …GMA will not campaign for Gibo!

http://abs-cbnnews.com/nation/04/05/10/arroyo-wont-campaign-gibo

Karma na ba ito ng pag junk ni Gibo sa NPC…time will tell tsk tsk tsk

Malamang si D Boss naka ngisi na LOL

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