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KRIS AND NOY

17 01 2010

http://t3.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn:6MYP7DK2w8UXWM%3Ahttp://midfield.files.wordpress.com/2009/03/cerge-remonde.jpg BREAKING NEWS: The Cerge is over. May he rest in peace.

PRESIDENTIAL CANDIDATES had a really busy schedule last week. Gilbert Teodoro, Richard Gordon, and Manny Villar debated on foreign policies. Noynoy Aquino dealt with some domestic issues.


The Kris Aquino-James Yap Saga
Last Wednesday, Kris Aquino reportedly stormed the residence of a certain Mayen Austria who’s been linked to the TV host’s husband, James Yap. Even from afar, witnesses knew it was Kris Aquino mainly because she was carrying a torch and was accompanied by Boy Abunda, Dingdong Dantes, Ogie Alcasid, Marian Rivera, Regine Velasquez, Anne Curtis, and Ai-ai De Las Alas.

Kris Aquino spoke on “The Buzz” about the Valleverde 2 incident involving her and Mayen Austria. Kris denied that she hurled invectives and insults at Mayen and her mother last Wednesday. The TV host also defended her brother, presidential candidate Noynoy Aquino whose name has been dragged into the controversy. This just in! AGB Nielsen’s ratings for Sunday: The Buzz (ABS-CBN):18%; Showbiz Central (GMA7):10%, and Noynoy Aquino (LP): 44%!

Kris Aquino spoke at length about the state of her marriage on nationwide TV. She said “I’ve tried. God knows I’ve tried” to which God said, “Idinamay na naman ako!”

Addressing her husband James live on “The Buzz,” TV host Kris Aquino said, “If you wanted this marriage to work, fix yourself first.” When James Yap heard this, he took a quick shower, shaved his beard, and sprayed perfume all over his body.

Sen. Noynoy Aquino told reporters that he had not given Kris any advice yet. He’s still consulting with his advisers on what advice to give her.

Kris Aquino reveals that 35-year-old Mayen Austria has been sending cakes and chocolates to James Yap. When Sen. Noynoy Aquino heard this, he advised his brother-in-law to return the goodies. But he promised James, “Ibibili na lang kita sa Quiapo.”

Conrado De Quiros is writing about the Kris Aquino-Mayen Austria controversy. De Quiros believes the issue is a battle between good and evil.

Top 5 Reactions of Presidential Candidates to the Kris-James-Mayen Controversy

No. 5: Jamby Madrigal: “Sexy ba ‘yung Mayen?”

No. 4: Gilbert Teodoro: “Judge her as her; not as a loyal supporter of Purefoods TJ Giants.”

No. 3: Joseph Estrada: “Let the people decide kung pwede pa ulit mambabae si James. Vox populi, vox Dei, the voice of the people is the voice of God.”

No. 2: Richard Gordon: “It’s not Mayen’s face that matters here. It’s the true account of the incident that matters. Pero ito ang tandaan n’yo: sa Subic, bawal ang tamad. Sa Subic, bawal ang kabit. Sa Subic, bawal ang taksil.”

And the No. 1 reaction of a presidential candidate to the Kris-James-Mayen controversy…

Manny Villar: “Bago tayo humusga, tingnan muna natin ang track record ni James Yap. Ano na ba’ng mga ginawa niya?”

Sugod Kris, Sugod!
To be interpreted by Sen. Noynoy Aquino to the tune of “Sugod,” a monster hit from rock group Sandwich
[Note: I highly recommend that you right click here first for the official video of this very catchy tune to fully enjoy singing the song.]

Sugod aking kapatid
Sa kabit ng ‘yong asawa
Ikumpronta’t ipahiya pa
Talakan hanggang umaga!

I-text mo na sina Boy at Jobert
Lagyan ng wax
Ang buhok para mukhang galit
Ilabas mo na
Hermes bag at LV
Hanep pumorma
Papuntang guerra!

Isang linggong pinag-isipan
Isang buwan mong inabangan
Surveillance sa ‘yong asawa
Ngayon pa ba, uurong ka? (Hala bira!)

Sugod aking kapatid
Sa kabit ng ‘yong asawa
Para que ‘pat ika’y taklesa
Lektyuran mo hanggang umaga!

In Other News…
Heard about Cong. Jules Ledesma? Reports say the husband of sexy star Assunta De Rossi is the most notorious chronic absentee of the House of Representatives. For the entire 2009, Ledesma only showed up twice in Batasan – first, during President Arroyo’s State of the Nation Address in June, and second, when he collected his salary in December. Sorry I forgot, he actually showed up thrice. The third one was when he received the “Ghost Employee of the Year” award.

Reports say Negros Occidental Rep. Jules Ledesma, a chronic absentee, showed up at the House of Representatives just twice for the entire 2009… to which sexy star Assunta De Rossi said, ‘Well, Batasan is much luckier. In 2009, he showed up in our bedroom only once!”

Pacquiao Update
Manny Pacquiao has been tested negative for performance-enhancing drugs. The result is not surprising since we all know that Pacquiao doesn’t need drugs to perform well. If there’s someone who needs it more, it’s Jules Ledesma!
________
“Her mouth is a honey-blossom, No doubt, as the poet sings; But within her lips, the petals, Lurks a cruel bee that stings.”
~ William D. Howells

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Enjoy the rest of the week!

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70 responses

17 01 2010
jumpinggene

Gusto ko lang sabihin…I love Kris…actually gusto ko lang sabihin na ako ang nauna dito sa comment page hehehehe

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17 01 2010
marsheemarsh

darn kala ko pa naman ako na ang nauna. haahha

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17 01 2010
marsheemarsh

“Even from afar, witnesses knew it was Kris Aquino mainly because she was carrying a torch and was accompanied by Boy Abunda, Dingdong Dantes, Ogie Alcasid, Marian Rivera, Regine Velasquez, Anne Curtis, and Ai-ai De Las Alas.”

– haha syet hindi ko kinaya to! the thought! ahaha ang sakit sa ulo!!

and there you go again PH, ang ganda ng sugod! wooh! hahaha panis aylovet. “para que pa’t ika’y taklesa, lecturan mo hanggang umaga!” hahaah i sweaaar iloveeet popost ko sa blog ko ha? hahaaha.

sakit sa ulo neto ni jules ledesma ano ba yan.

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18 01 2010
eufems

… sabi nila kay Kris, HINDI KA NAG-IISA, sa pag-okray ng ganda, kami’y kasama…

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17 01 2010
eufems

Haha, dapat sabihan na lang nila ulit si Kris to shut up. Sabi pa naman nya, siya daw ang ‘female Ninoy’. Sabagay, talak rin ng talak si Ninoy, may dahilan nga lang.

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17 01 2010
marsheemarsh

talak din ng talay si noy, period. hahaha

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18 01 2010
eufems

…with record speed (ref: Isang tanong)

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17 01 2010
chino

Funny stuff. Good job, PH. Kaya pala kaunti pa lang ads ni noynoy, unlike ads ni manny v. busy kasi si kris manugod. si manny, dami nang ads kasi ready na yung pondo. bilyones.

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17 01 2010
Alberto

PBA!!!
(PULITIKA BAKSETBALL BALITA BOKSING ARTISTA)

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13 07 2010
Anonymous

hahaha
korek

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17 01 2010
chamie miranda

ang galing nung sugod..LOL :))
with the hermes and LV,plus the torch..

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17 01 2010
mae23md

wow bilis ng pick up ng balita. nauna pa sa PEP.

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17 01 2010
elmer

lagyan mo na lng ng konting glitters itong asawa ni Kris..parang Avatar na! ang ilong. hahaha!

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17 01 2010
melo

Jamby: Sexy ba yung Mayen?…LOL

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17 01 2010
melba

Panalo! POst ko link ha? hehehhe nakakawala ng kalashingan ito!

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17 01 2010
Jules Led

PH,

Mamatay ka sa inggit!

Ha ha ha ha ha

JL

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17 01 2010
senior60

excellent mister heckler, kuhang-kuha mo si kris,
hala bira! hahaha…

and i love your “quote” for today….

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17 01 2010
johnken

the best! :))

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17 01 2010
Lady Gaga in Pink

I knew it. I knew it! you’ll be heckling this issue…

“Kris Aquino spoke at length about the state of her marriage on nationwide TV. She said “I’ve tried. God knows I’ve tried” to which God said, “Idinamay na naman ako!”

Like

18 01 2010
derdo

Why was Jules absent from COngress kaya? what reason did he give?

Like

18 01 2010
The Final 6: Istorya 2010 Presidential Survey: VOTE HERE - Page 389 - iSTORYA.NET

[…] KRIS AND NOY 17 01 2010 PRESIDENTIAL CANDIDATES had a really busy schedule last week. Gilbert Teodoro, Richard […]

Like

18 01 2010
topdog

Kris is known to self-destruct to pressures, kahit ma-dump pa nya si Noy!
Lol… Ang gulo siguro ng administration ni Noy kung sya ay mananalo with Kris around!

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18 01 2010
ScoobyDog

Ooowwwsss….Talaga?

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19 01 2010
TOMADOR

“Lol… Ang gulo siguro ng administration ni Noy kung sya ay mananalo with Kris around!”

LOL ang babaw mo naman chong! Pero I have to give it to you, your funny LOL

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19 01 2010
Lady Gaga in Pink

dont think so

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18 01 2010
Matteo

panalo ang interpretation ni Noynoy ng “Sugod!” at yung comment ni Jamby kay Mayen. haha! pati na rin ang reaksyon ni Villar.

On other note, is Jules Ledesma gay?

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18 01 2010
HP

On other note, is Jules Ledesma gay?

Asus! kunwari ka pa! It takes one to know one, teh.

Like

18 01 2010
Rob aka Tito Boy

And the No. 1 reaction of a presidential candidate to the Kris-James-Mayen controversy…

Manny Villar: “Bakit naligo na ba si Mayen sa kalat ng basura? Nag pasko na ba si James sa gitna ng kalsada?”

Suggestion: Heckler, defend your site with “copyscape” anti-plagiarism banner, just like mine. Here is the site:

http://www.copyscape.com/banners.php?o=f

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18 01 2010
eufems

Showbiz Central: ‘Yan ang tanong namin’

Jinkee: ‘Tunay ka bang isa sa amin?’

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19 01 2010
lakambini

now, that IS funny. 😛

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18 01 2010
js

oh, kris! drama queen forever. cguro if napanood ni james yap ung interview, he was like “not again” sabay roll ng eyes.

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18 01 2010
i'm no angel

frankly, i am quite tired of kris’ antics.
the world doesn’t have to know everything that goes on in her life.

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18 01 2010
ScoobyDog

Even from the start the marriage was doomed to fail…ikaw ba naman ang mag-asawa na talakera. Kesehodang sosyalerang talakera pa yan at kumikita ng milyones, di ako magtatagal sa pakikisama sa Kris na yan.

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19 01 2010
chamie miranda

money cannot buy happiness..

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18 01 2010
Mclight

Is there anything new with Cris? I think wala so dapat pa bang pag-usapan? Another subject pls PH.

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18 01 2010
layeta

hello loi! not really sure, but what the heck … belated happy birthday 😉

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19 01 2010
professionalheckler

hi lallie! thank u so much! i turned a year younger last january 16. benjamin buttonish ito. haha

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19 01 2010
layeta

even in high school, when benjamin button was totally alien to my sphere of knowledge, i’ve always known, you’ll get definitely younger through time! hahaha

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18 01 2010
suskupo

Akala kasi ni Kris, espesyal siya, at siya lang ang anak ng Diyos. Sinabi pa sa Nanay ni Mayen na mali daw ang pagpapalaki nito kay Mayen. Eh mas mali yata si Tita Cory sa pagpapalaki kay Kris kasi kumabit si Kris kay Joey Marquez at Philip Salvador!!! Kawawang James Yap! Saan pa ba magmamana yang ugaling ganyan ni Kris eh masamang damo ang pinanggalingan. Mga masasamang damo na nagbabait-baitan! Madaldal si Kris parang si Ninoy! Si Ninoy naman crook din siya noon!!!! If Ninoy was not assasinated and he became president, he most probably would have ruined the country like Marcos did! Ninoy’s father was a MAKAPILI during the Japanese Occupation of the Philippines. A traitor to the country. A lot of Filipinos died because of Ninoy’s father during the War. Ninoy is not a saint! Ninoy just was not given a chance to ruin the Philippines! Pinoys tama na! Itigil na ang papapa-uto sa mga Aquinos!

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19 01 2010
phreddox

Inutangan ka ba ng mga Aquino? Heheh

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19 01 2010
ScoobyDog

@phreddox -hahaha!

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16 11 2010
!!!

hui. di tong kumabit c kris sa mga yun no!
Sadya lang napaka ganda ni kris

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18 01 2010
luv ko si Kris!

ayaw daw nung iba jan kay Kris pero lagi naman updated sa mga nangyayari kay kris!

iritang irita kay kristeta pero tutok na tutok naman sa d buzz nung linggo! anubayan?!

magpakatotoo nga kayo! mga echuserang palaka!

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18 01 2010
melo

Wehh…si Jules Ledesma..nagbabasa ng blog mo,PH…Kaya pala,laging wala sa trabaho niya….
@Kris Aquino….hoy gising!!! Ginawa mo rin yan sa mga asawa ni Robin Padilla,Alvin Patrimonio,Joey Marquez etc etc…o di nakakarma ka!

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19 01 2010
chamie miranda

my ex said that if kris aquino will be appointed as presidential spokesperson if ever noynoy wins,every meeting with the press will be like the buzz and snn..

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19 01 2010
Worried Pinoy

Nakakasuka na ang mga antics ni kris. Iba naman please?

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19 01 2010
danny

Excellent song!

Again, PH rocks the house 😉

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19 01 2010
eufems

Condolences sa pamilya ni Press Sec Remonde

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19 01 2010
Lady Gaga in Pink

Philippine Star has sent me a wrong info about the death of the late Press Sec.

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19 01 2010
Jane

Up to now, people still dont see the real Kris; the Kris who craves for attention and who loves to broadcast even the supposedly most private parts of her life. For what? Just to get attention! Do we need to know them? They are all over the media! Look at the way she answered when interviewed. It sounded so contrived; rehearsed.

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19 01 2010
senior60

now, that was interesting, the post of suskupo, bakit
kaya ngayon ko lang ito nadinig….

but if only for the fact that we were liberated from marcos
because of ninoy’s death, then, we must be thankful to him….

but we have already paid what is due ninoy, we have already
placed cory to the presidency and noynoy to the senate, but
to elect noynoy as president of the philippines is, sobra na,
tama na, parang inilagay na natin sa kamay ng mga aquino
ang kapalaran ng ating bayan, eh mabuti sana kung karapat
dapat, hindi naman…

at si kris, ah si kris, kaya siguro ginaganyan ni james ay
dahil sa matapobre kasi, akala lang ng milyones nyang fans
mabait si kris pero balewala sa kanya ang mga pobreng
parents ni james na i’m sure the persons that matters to
james most aside from baby james maybe….

my condolence to the bereaved family of cerge…..

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20 01 2010
jasper

pag nanalo si noy2, may bodyguard na PSG segurado naka detail kay james na panakot sa mga alam mo na at mag report kay kris kanya tapos na kanyang masasayang escapades. i won’t be surprised if james yap years 4 his bro-in-law to loose so if i were villar, i’ll get james yap as an endorser.

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20 01 2010
TOMADOR

wow! just heard on dzmm, Enrile calls Villar a COWARD for his failure to attend the senate session and defend himself regarding the C5 controversy!!

“If you want to be the President of the Philippines, be MAN ENOUGH to face the senate session regarding the C5 anomaly”

tsk tsk tsk….nakalangoy ka na ba sa ilog na basura? fo shizzle!

Like

20 01 2010
thetruth

That’s Villar and Loren for you. They will do whatever is politically convenient for them. As long as it advances their political interests. Villar cannot face the music. Nalaman na din yung source nya ng kayamanan nya. ginamit ang kanyang posisyon para tumaas ang value ng kanyang mga lupain.

He is doing a GMA. being silent over the issue and hoping it blows over. hindi dapat to maging pangulo. I can’t stand another 6 years of GMA.

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21 01 2010
KRing

Re Kris…
As of now, we cannot get away with Kris Aquino mania. She’s like corruption (sa Pilipinas)- isa na siyang reality. reality at hindi problem since wala ng solusyon o in a milder version – remedy. Kris is Kris. at habang buhay si Kris…magtiis.

Para lang tayong ung prof ko wayback in college. (Considering na isa syang PI100 legend-description of subject: BUHAY NI RIZAL) Walang ginawa kundi punahin si Kris at spiels nito sa deal or no deal (was airing in primetime then) pati mga birada sa the buzz at maging WARDROBE nito…pero magkakasakit pag hindi nasubaybayan si Kris sa inaraw-araw hehehe. peace ha. but you know, most often than not, she’s worth a fun.

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28 06 2010
trisha monte

over na over na tlaga

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28 06 2010
Azil

Sa mga kababaihan , Kung sa tingin nyo ay nakakasisira na kayo ng pamilya sana tumigil na kayo. Kawawa po ang mga anak na maaapektohan ng paghihiwalay ng mag asawa.

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13 07 2010
dear

kris please decide wisely, hard to be separated with the one you really love. if you think you dont love him anymore and work out the thats the time to decide.

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13 07 2010
morris pablo

huwag na tayo mag-comment kay kris at yap,buhay nila yun at buhay na lang natin ang intindihin natin,ang mahalaga na dapat ay disiplina sa sarili at sa lipunan ay gawin upang maging halimbawa tayo sa mga batang lumalaki at nagkakaisip ok?

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13 07 2010
precious_ganda

..to all viewers hayaan na nating c kris ang magdesisyon ng buhay nila..
malalaki n cla at matitigas n ang mga buto..
kung ipipilit ni james n isurvive ang marriage nila..? y not??
pano kung di na hapi c kris..? pano kung di na cla hapi sa isat-isa??
mabuti ng maghiwalay diba? at idaan sa legal process…
kaya lang kawawa naman ang mga bata naapektuhan…
sa bagay weather2 lang yan…hayaan mo kris makakakakita ka rin ng lalaking para sau..at mamahalin ka ng tapat..ng buong buo…
initindihin mo nalang ang mga anak mo yan ang mas importante…
kay james…ang masasabi ko kung gus2 mo ng matinong pamilya pwes magpakatino ka..kala mo naman kung cno kang gwapo para pag-awayan xcuse me….

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13 07 2010
precious_ganda

…alam mo james ang cnayang mo lang lahat…
ngaun magmamakaawa ka para balikan ka ni kris..?
kung ako pa c kris di na kita babalikan pa…
pinatawad ka ni kris at binigyan ng chance nung nagkasala ka dati..
pero ngaun inulit mo ulit di ata tama yan..
dapat sau bigyan n ng leksyon…
oh ano…di ka kasama sa states noh…
kawawa naman…………………….

Like

13 07 2010
DOLLY

True k jan cno b nman c james kumpara ky james. milya 2 ang agwat ng layo nila tapos mambababae pa sya. Sobra naman bilib ni james sa sarili e kapangit naman ballag na pangit pa ng ilong. Kay kris iwanan mo ng tuluyan c james para makabangon k nanma n sa kahi2yan sa pagpili mo ng pangit na asawa tapos babaero pa. Nadagdagan lang ng pogi points yan ng maging asawa mo. kaya iwanan mo na talaga yan FOREVER

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13 07 2010
precious_ganda

..go kris…kaya mo yan ikaw pa…
para sakin ikaw ang babaeng di sumusuko…
kaya mo yan maraming smusuporta sau…
wag mo ng balikan c james kris para di ka na ulit masaktan…

Like

13 07 2010
precious_ganda

..to baby james at josh…
dont worry kahit wala kaung daddy..
nandyan naman c mommy mahal na mahal kau..
at di kau pababayaan….
god bless to all of u…

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13 07 2010
precious_ganda

…mabuhay c kris……….

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13 07 2010
precious_ganda

…go to hell james yap!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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13 07 2010
precious_ganda

…sa lahat ng makakabasa ni2…
ingat nalang..at god bless,,,,…

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13 07 2010
bratzeeh

it’s kris’s nature to express herself and her emotions..
she’s very strong and bold to me coz wala xang pakialam if people would judge her for what’s happening in her life..
she’s not hypocrite like the other stars na wala ng ginawa kundi mgpretend that they’re some kind of perfect people with a perfect life..
i love kris..
and i know that she knows what she’s doing…
i bet she thought about this decision over a thousand times

sa mga lalaking babaero, may the hell be with you

Like

13 07 2010
olve

sinong nagsasabing matapobre c kris d naman ha wala lahat ng mga kasama nila sa bahay sa baryo namin galing yon ngang kumare paula ko mahigit ng 20 years sa kanila di umaalis kasi mabait daw talaga cla

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13 07 2010
olive

kung wala kayong masabi wag na lang kayong manira ng tao.kung meron mang problema c kris at james hayaan natin cla wag na tayong makisawsaw pa sa problema,siguradong kayo meron ding problema d ba? nakikialam ba c kris sa mga problema natin.manalamin nga kayo para kayo ay matauhan,payo lang po sa akin ang tamaan wag magalit.

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