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CHRISTMAS AND POLITICS, TOO

24 12 2009

FIRST, some bad news. Mayon Volcano has erupted. The explosion has endangered the lives of Albay residents… prompting President Arroyo to declare martial law in the province.

AGAIN, I would like to apologize for this delayed post. I promise to have regular updates after Christmas.

Speaking of Christmas, a number of political personalities emailed me and asked why their own re-creations/re-enactments of the Nativity Scene were not mentioned in the previous post. I told them I was running out of time when I uploaded that particular post last Sunday. Nonetheless, I promised to feature their own Yuletide anecdotes in the succeeding posts.

It’s the holiday season. It’s Christmas! The signs are all over: people flocking to Divisoria; Communist rebels declaring a truce with the government, and Satur Ocampo shaking hands with Bongbong Marcos!

Did you hear what happened when the First Gentleman dressed up like Santa at the palace? When he started talking, his grandchildren said, “You’re not Santa! You’re Santo Niño!”

A Yuletide trivia about the Defensor-Santiagos. Since 1992, Sen. Miriam Defensor-Santiago and her husband have refused to display Christmas trees in their house. Asked why, the couple replied, “Ganun katindi ang galit namin sa mga puno.”

Makati City Mayor Jejomar Binay is perhaps the most consistent local executive when it comes to playing Santa to his constituents. He’s been doing that for 23 consecutive years!

Instead of designating someone to buy stuff for him, Sen. Manny Villar himself did the shopping this year. The most expensive item he bought was Loren Legarda.

Atty. Gilbert Teodoro had a difficult time shopping. So he just let Ronaldo Puno do the work for him.

Something bad happened to the Nativity Scene created by Sen. Panfilo Lacson. The three kings who were traveling at night were mistaken for robbers and were ‘neutralized.’ Lacson accused Erap of masterminding it.

The Liberal Party’s re-enactment of the Nativity Scene was one of the most controversial. Serge Osmeña backed out from playing Jesus when he learned that Ralph and Vilma would play Joseph and Mary.

In Pampanga, the re-enactment of the Nativity Scene at the capitol was ordered stopped by Governor Ed Panlilio. The priest-on-leave canceled the event when Mr. and Mrs. Bong and Lilia Pineda insisted on playing the role of the infant Jesus’ “godparents.”

In fairness to Lakas-Kampi-CMD, they did try to re-enact the Nativity Scene. They just couldn’t really complete the cast.

The Roxas-Araneta family had a lavish Christmas party in which the Nativity Scene was reenacted. As expected, Mar Roxas played Joseph. Korina Sanchez was infant Jesus’ stepmother.

Former senator Jovito Salonga’s favorite Christmas carol is “The Christmas Song.” He particularly likes the line that goes, “And so I’m offering this simple phrase/ To kids from 1 to 92…”

Sen. Ramon “Bong” Revilla Jr. also loves “The Christmas Song.” He gets horny when he hears the line, “Chest nuts roasting on an open fire…”

Senatorial aspirant and retired Army Major Gen. Jovito Palparan doesn’t like people in Santa outfit. He refused to elaborate but said, “I just hate Reds.”

Inquirer columnist Conrado De Quiros is giving away Transformers toys this year. He purchased both sets of Autobots and Decepticons… because he believes in toys that depict the battle between good and evil.

Rumors say Korina was a no-show at the Christmas party of ABS-CBN News and Current Affairs… making it the group’s most enjoyable gathering in recent years.

The Kapuso Network’s party for the press was well thought of. However, network bosses were reportedly alarmed when ABS-CBN’s press party got a higher rating from the attendees!

In terms of variety though, ABC 5’s Yuletide parties top them all. Every year, they celebrate the Holidays with new owners, new bosses, and new officemates.

Finally, for the first time in history, the Philippine Daily Inquirer and the Philippine Star had a joint Christmas party. Thanks to their joint sponsor, Noynoy Aquino.
______
“If I were given the opportunity to present a gift to the next generation, it would be the ability for each individual to learn to laugh at himself.”
~Charles Schulz

Light Bites
Q: In Maguindanao, an unidentified person donned a Santa costume. He was really unrecognizable. But when he spoke three words, the kids around him yelled, “Andal Ampatuan Jr!” What three words did he utter?
A: Backhoe! Ho! Ho!

Survey Says…
After watching them in a couple of presidential fora, who do you think deserves your vote in 2010?
NOYNOY AQUINO 25%
JC DE LOS REYES 1%
JOSEPH ESTRADA 1%
DICK GORDON 26%
JAMBY MADRIGAL <1%
GILBERT TEODORO 36%
EDDIE VILLANUEVA 5%
MANNY VILLAR 6%

We have a new survey. Please vote now.

Personal
I’d like to thank Senator Chiz Escudero for the Holiday txt greets. Chiz’ thoughtfulness never fails to amaze me – despite the heckling.

And to everyone who made this year a remarkable and memorable one for The Professional Heckler, Merry Christmas!

To borrow Pacquiao’s line: Maraming salamat sa inyung supurta!

Have a safe vacation!

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55 responses

24 12 2009
bukopie28

Galeng talaga! kudos, Professional Heckler! Merry Christmas!

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24 12 2009
siobhan

thanks for the laughs sir! you’re the best talaga! Merry Christmas, PH at sa lahat ng readers. Cheers!

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24 12 2009
badong

Happy Holidays PH!

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24 12 2009
preciouswest1025

meri xmas prof!!!!

galing nman.. ng greet c Chiz.. idol ko din yun. umatras lang, sayang!

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24 12 2009
eufems

‘Personal
I’d like to thank Senator Chiz Escudero for the Holiday txt greets. Chiz’ thoughtfulness never fails to amaze me – despite the heckling.’

Iyan ay nangangahulugan ng pagiging hindi masyadong maramdamin ni Senador Francis Joseph ‘Chiz’ Escudero y Guevarra. Kaya ko siya gusto kahit masyado siyang masalita. Salita at hindi daldal ang ginagawa niya.

Salamat din sa iyo PH. Pinasaya mo ang taong ito. Maligayang Pasko at Manigong Bagong Taon.

O sa sabi nga ng Pamahalaang Panlungsod ng Lungsod Quezon,

Happy Holidays and a Joyful New Year’

[Pagbati mula kay Pangalawang Punong Lungsod Herbert Bautista at kay Joy Belmonte

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24 12 2009
atebeybs

ceasefire muna tayo sa kantyawan ha…..ehehhee.

mag grand EB na lang tayo……sa bahay ni PH.

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28 12 2009
Matteo

agree!!!

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24 12 2009
tybox

Thanks for a year of jeers!
Malipayong Pasko!

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24 12 2009
raul

mr. PH, you demoted my favorite general…

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24 12 2009
professionalheckler

sorry army major general pala

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24 12 2009
cris

hehe ayos… yari na naman si mr. de quiros. i’m sure may explanation na naman siya dahil talo si noynoy sa survey dito. peace!

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24 12 2009
marsheemarsh

ahaha i like the TV network xmas parties :p merry christmas PH! 🙂

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24 12 2009
rgf

I’d like to thank Senator Chiz Escudero for the Holiday txt greets. Chiz’ thoughtfulness never fails to amaze me – despite the heckling.

That only shows how humble and grounded this guy is. I would have voted for him.

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24 12 2009
Jeko

merry christmas mr. heckler! hoping for more heckles in 2010! 🙂

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24 12 2009
maries

Merry Christmas, Loi.

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24 12 2009
phreddox

Merry Christmas PH. You’re making a world of difference with your humor. Have an even bigger, and greater year ahead!

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24 12 2009
lynlyn

Merry Christmas PH! 🙂

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24 12 2009
Tito Boy

“I’d like to thank Senator Chiz Escudero for the Holiday txt greets. Chiz’ thoughtfulness never fails to amaze me – despite the heckling.”

Ilan text page inabot PH? haha

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24 12 2009
professionalheckler

hahahaha. quarter page lang

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24 12 2009
garju101

Mr.H let me greet you with the warmest of greetings this Christmas, may you have a wonderful year of heckling ahead!!! Keep it up and continue to spread the cheer!

Since 36% of the Poll respondents are voting for Gibo let me also extend my Greetings to the Green Team members who follow your blogs regularly. A link to Gibo’s Christmas message is also included:

Have a good Mr.H and always keep safe!

Sincerely,

Garju101

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24 12 2009
senior60

mister heckler, please make good your promise ha,

nakaka addict eh…

merry xmas everybody and a happy new year too….

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24 12 2009
elmer

‘wag ka mag-alala..supurtahan ta ka! ahahahaha!

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25 12 2009
reanne

merry christmas

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25 12 2009
hazel

never failed to make me laugh… 😀

now, can’t wait for the New year post… 😀

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25 12 2009
darkcheron

Hey Heckler,

Merry Christmas to you and your family! Thanks for making me laugh and curing my boredom for the whole of ’09 and looking forward to 2010 with more of your “heckling.”

PS: Could you add me up in your facebook?

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25 12 2009
professionalheckler

SURELY. andun lang ako. lahat ng nagpapa-add na readers ina-add ko.

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28 12 2009
darkcheron

Heckler,

What’s your ID on facebook?

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29 12 2009
darkcheron

Never mind. Found it, hehe.

Thanks!

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25 12 2009
Anonymous

Maraming salamat PH sa isang makabuluhang katatawanan na ibinigay mo sa aming lahat nitong 2009 at lalo pa sa 2010, siguradong mas nakakawindang ang mga post mo. Mabuhay ka! Ingat palagi….big hug!

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25 12 2009
juanaganda

Maraming salamat sa lahat ng makahulugan pero sobrang nakaka-aliw na mga posts mo this year PH at sa susunod pang mga taon. Mabuhay ka! Ingat palagi at syempre…Merry Christmas! Mwah! 🙂

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25 12 2009
nielboi

Merry Xmas PH! Idol tlga kita!

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25 12 2009
chuchumetoy

shalom! isang mapagpalang pasko! thanks for sharing ur wit and humors to us (less fortunate)

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25 12 2009
john villarin

tukayo
merry xmas and a prosperous new year to you and your family… may you have many more IDIOTS and TRAPOS to heckle in the future…

lovelots,

john and family

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25 12 2009
melo

Happy Christmas PH…Looking forward to more heckling this coming 2010…Stay happy!!!

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25 12 2009
khymley

Have a wonderful Holiday Season! Walang kupas ang inyong blog! Love it! And as always makes me laugh every time I visit your site, kahit nakatingin ang mga tao sa work place ko sa akin! 😀 …

ps: hopefully you’ll add me also sa FB din. Although I don’t know how to search your info. Perhaps you can just add me. thanks…

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27 12 2009
professionalheckler

my email add is in my profile (About the Heckler)

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26 12 2009
Jove Francisco

hello heckler! natawa naman ako dun sa TV5 xmas party hehehe.
Merry Christmas sa iyo and more power sa fave humor blog ng TEN/Sidetracked!

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27 12 2009
professionalheckler

hi jove. happy new year! looking forward to working with TV 5 people soon. hahaha! 🙂

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26 12 2009
nypd

see this!

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26 12 2009
johnonline

maligayang pasko!!!

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26 12 2009
aji6462

Happy holidays, P. Heckler!

You’ll definitely have more material in election year 2010! Happy heckling!

Like

27 12 2009
itsthebigpicture

happy christmas to you!

never fails to impress me with your humor and witty remarks.

kahit affected ka na din ng network war! haha!

have a blessed new year ahead!

Like

27 12 2009
eufems

hintayin po namin Year-Ender niyo, if any, sana meron

Blessed New Year to all!

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28 12 2009
smashingpinay

hay…

crush ko na talaga si chiz dahil sa PH.

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28 12 2009
Matteo

hahahaha! funniest post yet.

Gawd, I snorted loud here in the office when I read re Miriam Defensor-Santiago refusing to have a Christmas Tree in their house. hahahaha!!!

LOL @ ABS-CBN’s Christmas party w/o Korina.

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29 12 2009
TOMADOR

Merry Christmas sa Lahat! Happy New year na din

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7 01 2010
Lady Gaga in Pink

so astig! a text greeting from CHIZ!

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21 01 2010
del

Hi Loi,

your blog has been copied and printed as an Editorial in a local newspaper, up north.

You may want to check on it.

http://ilocostimes.com/pdf-issues/jan11-jan17-10.pdf

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21 01 2010
professionalheckler

hey del! thanks for informing me. i just read it. OMG! Sobrang OMG. these are legitimate journalists aren’t they? why are they doing this?

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21 01 2010
del

Yes, they are legitimate journalist. I came from their place and i’m saddened that they are copying articles and get the credit as their own.

I already emailed the publisher and I hope they will look into it and apologize to you.

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21 01 2010
professionalheckler

thanks del. i wonder, sino kaya ‘yung JOHNNY MERCADO? 🙂

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21 01 2010
del

Here’s the link:

http://www.ilocostimes.com/

The article is in PDF format. You can just click on the initial page’s of the site to expand the content. The editorial section is on the fourth page.

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21 01 2010
del

Nangisit kad met sikom lakay ta ammom met agilokano? 😀

I think he is also the Juan Mercado of “In Depth” column of the same newspaper.

His column is in Page 5.

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21 01 2010
professionalheckler

JUAN MERCADO? as in “the” JUAN L. MERCADO? really? but he’s a respected journalist! bakit naman nakalusot sa editors ‘yun? salamat ulit sa impormasyon del.

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21 01 2010
del

I am not really sure. I just thought that its him because of the name Juan, thye just translated it in English :). And he is just the one in the newspaper that has a surname of Mercado.

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