BELO THE BELT

arroyobeauty Beauty 101
If you want to look like Boy Abunda, go to Calayan. If you want to look like Dingdong or Piolo, go to Belo. But if you want to look for Bolante or Mike Arroyo, go to St. Luke’s.

If you want to look like Boy Abunda, go to Calayan. If you want to look like Dingdong or Piolo, go to Belo. But if you want to look like the Alabang Boys, wear shades.

If you want to look like Boy Abunda, go to Calayan. If you want to look like Dingdong or Piolo, go to Belo. But if you want to look like Manny Villar… that’ll be two Manny Villars? Double na naman?!?

If you want to look like Boy Abunda, go to Calayan. If you want to look like Dingdong or Piolo, go to Belo. But if you want to look like Bino De La Paz, play golf with the Pangandamans.

If you want to look like Boy Abunda, go to Calayan. If you want to look like Dingdong or Piolo, go to Belo. But if you want to look like Mar Roxas… p*tang-ina, seryoso ka? You wanna look like him?!?

If you want to look like Boy Abunda, go to Calayan. If you want to look like Dingdong or Piolo, go to Belo. But if you want to look like a tech-savvy Communist, go to the Netherlands and give orders to your army via the Internet.

If you want to look like Boy Abunda, go to Calayan. If you want to look like Dingdong or Piolo, go to Belo. But if you want to look like Jinggoy and Joseph Estrada, go to Ateneo.

If you want to look like Boy Abunda, go to Calayan. If you want to look like Dingdong or Piolo, go to Belo. But if you want to look like Mike Enriquez, go to La Salle.

If you want to look like Boy Abunda, go to Calayan. If you want to look like Dingdong or Piolo, go to Belo. But if you want to look invincible despite allegations of massive corruption? Go to hell!

boy-abunda-king-of-talk-01 Vicki vs. Boy
Interviewed on Showbiz Central last Sunday, Dr. Vicki Belo quipped, “If you want to look like Boy Abunda, go to Calayan. But if you want to look like Dingdong or Piolo, go to Belo.” Boy Abunda felt insulted, and was hurt and shocked… mainly because the remark came from the same person who started his deterioration.

Vicki vs. Boy II
A (self-serving) survey conducted by ABS-CBN’s Showbiz News Ngayon on Tuesday night asked, “Amid the rivalry between Drs. Vicki Belo and Manny Calayan, kanino ka pupunta? (A) Belo (B) Calayan (C) None. The economy is so bad, the voters actually picked Ellen Lising. (‘Sing chaka pero ‘di ‘sing mahal!)

calayan Vicki vs. Boy III
In response to Dr. Vicki Belo’s controversial remark, Dr. Manny Calayan said, “There’s a simple reason to our ‘To C is to believe’ campaign and that’s more about inner beauty that’s from a good and sincere heart like Boy Abunda which transcends outward a person’s life and touches other’s people’s lives. And through that inner beauty, we see and believe in the beauty of other people and we believe in their goodness.”
For that statement alone, Dr. Manny Calayan automatically earned a Top 10 spot in next week’s Bb. Pilipinas pageant!

Vicki vs. Boy IV
Addressing Dr. Vicki Belo’s “insulting” remark, TV host Boy Abunda said, “We had more good times than bad. This is not the Vicki I know.” That was the same sentiment echoed by Vicki Belo’s… mirrors.
—————–
Survey Says…
Did you play the Super Lotto last week?
Results:
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Others: 1%

We have a new survey. Please vote now.
__________________
“People say I’m extravagant because I want to be surrounded by beauty. But tell me, who wants to be surrounded by garbage?”
~Imelda Marcos

Author: professionalheckler

See About the Heckler

41 thoughts on “BELO THE BELT”

  1. Seriously this issue was like exposing their dirty laundry to the public. Both of them have smeared beauty in and out. Come on, Boy Abunda being the under dog??? He said “Narating ko ang kinalalagyam ko ng wala akong tinatapakan” PLEASE!!! That’s why you’re in that sticky situation now…marami kang na-agrabyado and you as a PR man promoted some acts and people the wrong way. Look at yourself in the mirror….remember your mirror from your interviews?

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  2. BOY ABUNDA SUCKS!

    VICKY BELO RULES!

    “Vicki vs. Boy III
    In response to Dr. Vicki Belo’s controversial remark, Dr. Manny Calayan said, “There’s a simple reason to our ‘To C is to believe’ campaign and that’s more about inner beauty that’s from a good and sincere heart like Boy Abunda which transcends outward a person’s life and touches other’s people’s lives. And through that inner beauty, we see and believe in the beauty of other people and we believe in their goodness.”
    For that statement alone, Dr. Manny Calayan automatically earned a Top 10 spot in next week’s Bb. Pilipinas pageant!”

    – PANALO TO! HAHAHA!

    Like

  3. HIYA Mr Professional Heckler here’s 5 semi-witty jokes that will kick you off your seat:

    A heckler in a forum was asking the late bishop Sheen of USA this question?

    “Did God save Jonah from the whale?”

    the bishop replied:”When I Get to Heaven,I will ask!”

    “What if He is not there?”

    “THEN YOU ASK HIM!!!” was his retort.

    A elderly priest invited an agnostic to come to his parish church

    “There are sinful hypocrites there,I am tired of them!” was the agnostic’s answer

    “there is always room for one more!” was all the elderly priest said.

    A restaurant owner,who is also an agnostic approached a catholic lay minister with these words:

    “Brother I know some dishonest people in my business,who are go to your church on Sunday!!”

    “Why my child not all Christians are like that,although they are not perfect ” said the lay minister

    “But brother,aren’t Catholics supposed to be special?”

    Yes they are,Yes they are” was the lay minister’s sad reply

    A Dying man was telling the priest who was exorcising him: “Father I will not repent until I know where I am going!” was his reply to the priest words:”REPENT OF YOUR SINS NOW!”

    A nun seeing a drunk man praying the stations of the cross in the monastery church told him:

    “MISTER YOU’RE DOING IT BACKWARDS!!!”

    “Ha! no wonder Jesus Christ gets stronger after every station!”(end of jokes)

    Nice blog learned about it from billy esposo!

    Enjoy!! 🙂

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  4. I really don’t get Boy Abunda, what Belo said was a joke! People nowadays can’t take jokes anymore??!!! Boy Abunda’s supposed success has gone way over his Freakin head that a simple joke such as that would merit someone to cry on F**@in National TV, that is so pathetic!

    Abunda acts as if his “dangal” was tarnished, comon…you aint that good looking naman talaga eh, I mean Calayan is endorsing beauty…EXTERNAL beauty to be exact, getting Abunda as an endorser makes me and most people think otherwise. Then Calayan says “Abunda exhudes Inner Beauty!” or something to that effect…. wow! since when does cosmetic surgery improve someone’s inner beauty aber? Again another pathetic statement.

    oh I have an entry on your “if you want to look…” thing.
    “If you want to look like Boy Abunda, go to Calayan. If you want to look like Dingdong or Piolo, go to Belo. But if you like to look like a Million bucks go to Belo and be his new boyfriend”

    Like

  5. What’s the big deal? its just a joke.

    Filipinos are so “onion-skinned”. Everytime someone makes a joke about something or someone, they tend to over react.

    E kung sina Leno, Letterman, Colbert at iba pang late night shows at stand-up comedian kung tumira sa mga popular figures ng US parang wala lang. Dito sa atin makakalaban mo ang buong industriya.

    That is why I like Mo Twister’s syle, dahil siya lang sa lahat ng host ang may balls na mang-gago ng sino man.

    Remember when desperate housewives made a comment about medical degrees in our country, yung ibang grupo kuno humihingi pa ng apology sa station na nag-broadcast ng series na yun. Ayaw tignan ang sarili, napaka self-righteous ng mga p*tang-ina nila (according to Mar Roxas)

    Napaka-aarte mo BOy Abunda para kang napakabait na tao. Ito naman si Calayan sumasakay pa sa issue para lang ma-promote ang “C is to believe” niyang slogan. These people are bunch of crap.

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  6. Hindi dapat magalit si Boy Abunda dahil nasabi lang niya iyon dahil si Dr Calayag ang
    nagretoke rin ng mukha ni Dr Belo. Hindi niya kayang gawin sa sarili niya ang pagretoke kaya tinawagan din niya si Dr Calayag. Kaya tingnan ninyo para silang kambal ni Boy Abunda.
    Kaya relaxs lang…..

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  7. Professional Heckler is witty, gritty, satirical– and adorable. Maabilidad na, gwapo pa. I understand PH said he doesn’t buy the concept of after life but if heavens were real, he caught a lot of blessings when he’s still a baby.

    Galing ng heckling mo lalo na sa issue about Vicky-Boy. Crush na kita kuya PH 🙂

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  8. i don’t think belo’s statement is derogatory. it even pushed calayan to a different level. imagine, if you want to look ‘more human’ go to calayan! let’s face it abunda looked like the behind of a hippo before he went to calayan… now he looks more like dr joven cuanang of st luke’s hospital. don’t you think, or do you think?

    Like

  9. Ricky F. Lo, in one of his columns said:

    “If you don’t mind looking like Belo, go to her clinic, but if you want to look gorgeous like Ruffa Guttierrez or Ruffa Mae Quinto then by all means go to Mikaela!”

    Belo’s comment was really offensive. There is a thin line between a harmless joke and a joke coupled with malice…and hers was definitely malicious…

    Like

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