WHAAAPAC!

De La Hoya Pacquiao Boxing
The Dream Match
Manny Pacquiao was credited for landing 224 of 585 punches to just 83 of 402 for De La Hoya. Again, Pacquiao, 224 and De La Hoya, 83! Eighty-three! To give you an idea how lousy De La Hoya was… in a recent fight with Manny, Jinkee Pacquiao landed 85!

Odd makers predicted a De La Hoya victory yesterday. Some analysts say it was mismatch. But Manny Pacquiao defied the odds and proved them all wrong. Before the final bell sounded, the Golden Boy became the Swollen Boy.

De La Hoya Pacquiao Boxing Vice President Noli De Castro ran toward a euphoric Manny Pacquiao and hugged him as soon as the People’s Champ was officially declared the winner. Filipinos who were watching the delayed telecast were wonderin’ how in the world did Noli sneak past Chavit Singson to make it into the ring.

Post fight interviews – in English – revealed a more articulate Manny Pacquiao. In fact, he now speaks better English than the vice president.

Sports analysts say Manny Pacquiao continue to validate his status as the world’s top pound-for-pound fighter. When Vice President De Castro heard this, he said, “Teka, Pilipino siya, hindi British. Dapat peso-for-peso fighter!”

mpac_chavit2
After the bout, deputy national security adviser Luis “Chavit” Singson did not climb into the ring as he did during Manny’s previous fights. His conspicuous absence fueled rumors he actually placed a huge bet on Oscar De La Hoya.

Reports say two people suffered fatal heart attacks while watching the historic Pacquiao-De La Hoya bout. But sorry to disappoint you guys, both fatalities were neither named Jocelyn nor Jose Miguel.

Hours before yesterday’s fight, former Philippine Daily Inquirer sports editor Al S. Mendoza, now a jabloid columnist, spoke with certainty on radio that De La Hoya would demolish Pacquiao because the Golden Boy, he said was “bigger, stronger, and a better fighter.” The Professional Heckler tried to get his reaction after the fight around 1pm but I was told that Mr. Mendoza was still finishing his hefty meal. You know what he had for lunch? His words.

GMA 7’s actual telecast of the Pacquiao-De La Hoya bout ended shortly before 4 o’clock in the afternoon. So delayed was the telecast that before it could even finish, De La Hoya’s cuts and bruises have all healed.

mpac_dio Mrs. Dionisia Pacquiao vowed to keep praying from the opening bell until such time that Pacquiao was declared the winner. She started at 11:30 am and finished at around 4… because she mistakenly thought GMA7’s telecast was live.

Because of the huge crowd at the MGM Grand Arena in Las Vegas, Karylle Padilla Tatlonghari admitted feeling very nervous while singing the Philippine National Anthem. She felt even more nervous when she saw Wilma Galvante in the crowd exchanging dagger looks with Annabelle Rama.

Briefly Noted
DZMM’s morning commentators (yup, those high-profile hecklers) are taking potshots at Pacquiao’s historic win, even insinuating the fight was fixed. Guess who was interviewed by Korina and Ted to give credence to their suspicion? Al Mendoza! Well, birds of a feather…

__________
I never expect to lose. Even when I’m the underdog, I still prepare a victory speech.
~ H. Jackson Brown Jr.

marky4 In Memoriam
Condolences to the family of young actor Marky Cielo who reportedly died in his sleep Sunday morning. He’s such a nice kid, genuinely nice. Our show will miss you Marky. He was only 20. Sigh. What a waste. Saludo na talaga ako kay former senator Ramon Revilla Sr. Ang tatag! (Oops, sorry. You’ve just been heckled!)

Author: professionalheckler

See About the Heckler

21 thoughts on “WHAAAPAC!”

  1. hehe..i don’t think manny needs to buy votes. he has greater chance of winning in 2010 provided that he retire from boxing. otherwise, he might lose again in his election bid since his fans (myself included) would definitely prefer that he focus on boxing instead of politics.

    sans the politics, Pacquiao is The Man.

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  2. I would say that for those who says that Dela Hoya would win the match against Pacquiao, well, “it’s not the size of the dog in the fight, it’s the size of the fight in the dog. And no dog right now has more fight in him than Manny Pacquiao.” I’m proud of you Pac Man. My fellow workers (Americans) were proud of you too!

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  3. haha! good jab at al mendoza. his lack of confidence in philippine sports players is really irritating. he also exemplifies what annoying individuals who have delusional high regards for themselves do — be suspicious of other pinoy’s achievements. tsk tsk.

    sad to hear about marky cielo’s passing. he deserved a bigger break with his acting chops, but he was happy as he is (no ego from what i’ve heard).

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  4. wow galing talaga ng mga pinoy! that’s one of a great performance of “Money” este manny Pacquiao on the ring. The improvement of Pacquiao comes from the root word “Roach”-the predictions are right and accurate. Maraming salamat sa karangalan na binigay mo Manny.. We are proud of you.. Beat Ricky Hatton and Possibly the comeback of Floyd Mayweather Jr. Hehehehehe.GO MANNY

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  5. Funny as Heck, as usual! I hate to pull the plug on everyone’s boombox, though. (Okay. Here come the tsinelas.) I have lost ALL MY LOVE for Peck-yow since Solar Sports’ Sunday airing of the HBO docu about him and The Golden Boy. There. I said it!

    First of all, I was never a big boxing fan. (I mean, come on. Two people pounding on each other’s heads with all their might while the whole room cheers.) Then I saw footages of the two fighters contrasting lifestyles. And everything… icky that I find in us Pinoys I found in…well, the Pinoy. Not to mention all the langaws that followed his trail of fame and money to Vegas. Nevermind the gaudy displays of wealth. (Hey, Nanay Dioni has a right to wear her latest set of dyamantes with her favorite pambahay).

    It was a turn off to see Pacquiao surround himself with people who seem to attach themselves to him only because of his propensity to dole out giant sums of cash. Like his “team” (how many alalays does an athlete need anyway?) whom he offered 2000 dollars each for losing 10 pounds, then tempted with 200 dollars if they broke their diet during Thanksgiving dinner. (The heftiest challenger promptly stuffed his face with fistfuls of food before happily waving a fan of dollar bills at the camera. Pathetic.)

    It was a turn off to watch Pacquiao personally handing out food bags and money bills to kababayans at home (and bags of whole turkeys to kababayans abroad) like it wouldn’t be the same if he made quiet, anonymous donations, minus all the flashing cameras and grinning political entourage. He’s a generous guy. And he has a right to enjoy his popularity! But seeing him, like he needed to make sure everyone saw him give away his money, just made me feel…icky.

    And where were his kids on one of the most important nights of his life? De la Joya was shown spending lots of Dad-and-me time in between training sessions, which made him seem more genuine and warm. There was no mention of Pacquiao’s relationship with his kids, whom he could’ve easily flown in, in place of his sangkaterbang alipores.

    Maybe HBO was biased. Still, I think De La Joya’s Gold. Hindi gold-plated. 😛

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