LAST WORDS

BEFORE HE TOOK his last breath, Theodore Roosevelt uttered, “Put out the light.” George Bernard Shaw murmured, “I want to sleep.” And shortly before his fatal car crash, James Dean was quoted to have said, “My fun days are over.” Locally, how could showbiz writers forget the infamous suicide note of ‘80s bold star Stella Strada? Her final words? “This is a crazy planets!” Here’s an updated version of my blog post last year titled…

Top 12 Last Words and Deathbed Statements of Local Celebrities

12: Bro. Mike Velarde: “Gagaleeeeng! Lalakas! Gagaleng! Lalak… uk…uk…ugh!”

11: Sen. Francis Pangilinan: “Hiwalay kung hiwalay!”

10: John Lapus: “Doc, totoo bang mamamatay na ako? Yes or No? Don’t Lie to Me!

9: Nora Aunor: (Hallucinating) “Ding ang bato! Ihagis mo sa akin ang bato!”

8: Sen. Manuel Villar: “Cynthia… sa araw ng aking libing, gusto ko idaan n’yo ang aking funeral procession… sa C5!”

7: Sen. Alan Peter Cayetano: “Arf! Arf! Arf!”

6: Sen. Jamby Madrigal: (While gasping for her last breath) “A-a-attorney, pppa-pakibago ng la-la-last will and tetes-testament ko. I have me-me-made a de-de-decision a-a-attorney. Nobody de-dedeserves to inherit my ma-ma-money except – for myself! Akin lahat ang mana!”

5: Joseph Estrada: “Hik!”

4: Ret. PNP comptroller Eliseo De La Paz: “Sweetheart, ‘yong makukulektang abuloy, paki-convert sa euro huh.”

3: Jocjoc Bolante: “I am prepared to face death… in the proper forum.”

2: Cong. Jose De Venecia: “I swear! This is it na talaga! I’m now ready to tell the truth no matter who gets hurt! May oras pa ba?” (And then he dies)

And the No. 1 last words and deathbed statement of local celebrities…

1: President Arroyo: (in her deathbed, when doctors asked how she felt) “My respiratory fundamentals are very strong. I have become more resilient amid the global health crisis. I will survive this.”

See also: Deathbed Declarations of Contemporary Politicians and Celebrities

Here Comes the Bribe, er Bride

Reports say Luli Arroyo will wed her banker boyfriend next year.

__________
Never take life too seriously; after all, no one gets out of it alive.
— Elbert Hubbard

Author: professionalheckler

See About the Heckler

18 thoughts on “LAST WORDS”

  1. Sana Gawin na Nating 20….

    13. MERALCO Chairman Manolo Lopez – O Yan,Magliliwanag na siguro ang Buhay niyo!

    14. GSIS Chairman Winston Garcia – Ayoko munang mamatay!!! Paano na Yung premiums?….Yung Di pa nabayarang Pensions….Yung mga…Yung mga…Painting ni Juan Luna?

    15. Allyssa Alano – Thiz is deh Keys op Deth…I say Gud-Buy….

    16. Lolit Solis – Pakiusap,Pag namatay ako,Gusto kong Burol sa Sofitel…Sina Sam at Piolo ang kakanta ha?

    17. DOJ Secretary Raul Gonzales – Why? why should I die? Di pwede, Humanda ka LORD,Kakasuhan kita!!!

    18. Willie Revillame – Paano pag Mamatay ako,Sino pa ang Magpapasaya sa Mundo [Then Cries withOUT tears.]

    19. Cristy Fermin and Jobert Sucaldito – NAGMULAAAA SA LUPAAAA,MAGBABALIIIIK SA LUPAAAA…

    20. Sen.Miriam Defensor Santiago – This is outside the Konstituushieeen of the Repaaablik,Your Hoooonor,I won’t be eeyyybel to Do tmy Purpooowz for this Country!!!I Derfooor rejeekt my Deaaaath!!!!

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